Posts tagged "Emmys"

A Child Has Shed Its Hayden Panettiere Cocoon

Fun Fact: This pic is from August. Four months ago August. She’s dead. She died.
In defiance of the laws of physics, Hayden Panettiere gave birth to a baby girl, Kaya Evdokia, last Tuesday, according to PEOPLE, who spoke very little about Hayden’s current state because housewives don’t want to read about a severed torso…

The Superficial / December 15, 2014

The 66th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards

Here’s the rest of The 66th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards where my comprehensive reporting will tell you Breaking Bad won fucking everything except for that one award for True Detective and Benedict Cumberbatch winning for Sherlock which slightly makes up for Rust Cohle losing to Walter White. More importantly, Laura Prepon demonstrated the misogynistic side…

The Superficial / August 26, 2014

Christina Hendricks Brought Her Monster Breasts #Emmys

As small children, most of us dreamed about Ronald McDonald having really huge tits. I’m talking so huge you don’t even know how he’s carrying them around, and maybe Grimace should talk to him about steroids. So now that I’ve explained how Christina Hendricks is so popular, here’s her breasts at the Emmys last night…

The Superficial / August 26, 2014

Hayden Panettiere Brought Her Monster Fetus #Emmys

Here’s a pregnant as fuck Hayden Panettiere at the Emmys last night where it was a goddamn miracle her unborn daughter didn’t burst out of her chest and terrorize Sigourney Weaver. Which isn’t so much a joke about the giant’s fetus inside of her (a justifiable curse for stealing his magic beans) as much it&#8217…

The Superficial / August 26, 2014

Jenny McCarthy’s Breasts And, I Dunno, Something About Creative Arts

The Creative Arts Emmys were yesterday and honored hard-working, dedicated individuals who diligently work behind-the-scenes to create all the shows we can’t shut up about. Except none of those people have huge, fake breasts, so here’s Jenny McCarthy. Which is a shame because she’s killed people. Kids are dead because of her, and yet her…

The Superficial / August 18, 2014

You Forgot Tatiana Maslany, You Idiots!

This has been our complete coverage of The 2014 Emmy Nominations.
“In-Depth Journalism: We Dip Our Balls In It” – THE SUPERFICIAL | AboutFacebookTwitter
Photo: BBC America

The Superficial / July 10, 2014

Kaley Cuoco’s Engaged Because F*ck You, Superman

For those of you don’t watch CBS sitcoms because you haven’t given up on life, Kaley Cuoco is probably best known for being the first chick Henry Cavill banged after Man of Steel hit theaters because he saw her on TV once and wondered what her vagina would be like. Which turned out to be…

The Superficial / September 27, 2013

The 65th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards

We’ve already spent way too much time on the Emmys, so here are the rest of the red carpet pics featuring such classics as Rapidly De-Aging Skylar White, an act of terrorism, Julianne Hough & The See-Through Butt, My Dick Is Huge I Can Laugh However I Want, Haha! Superman Dumped You, Bring Your Viral

The Superficial / September 23, 2013

The Breast of The Emmys: Sofia Vergara, Christina Hendricks & Sarah Silverman? Wait, What?

Now that I’m done geeking out about super alien man and the bald scientist he punches, let’s get back to what really matters at the Emmys: Rich lady boobs. So here’s Sofia Vergara, Christina Hendricks, and oddly enough Sarah Silverman who I sometimes forget is a woman that needs to be reduced to nothing more…

The Superficial / September 23, 2013

Hey, Warner Bros, Here’s Your Lex Luthor

With the rumors of Bryan Cranston playing Lex Luthor in Batman Vs. Superman being shot down by reports that his first post-Breaking Bad role will be Trumbo, fanboys hoping for a Walter White Lex are obviously disappointed. So allow me to suggest an even better alternative: Damian Lewis, baby. BOOM. Don’t get me wrong, I…

The Superficial / September 23, 2013

Tatiana Maslany Got Robbed

After io9 wouldn’t shut up about it, I finally gave Orphan Black a whirl a few weeks back. It takes a few episodes to find its pacing, but after that you’re completely sucked in and here’s where Tatiana Maslany comes in. At one point, and this happened to me around the 8th or 9th episode,…

The Superficial / July 18, 2013

The 64th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards

HIM: OhmygodjusttakethefuckingpictureIcantfeelmylegs.
Alright, let’s see, we posted Christina Hendricks’ breasts on the red carpet… Kat Dennings’s breasts on the red carpet and.. awesome, our work is done. Here’s the rest of the Emmys if anyone even gives a shit, but just in case, we tossed in Sofia Vergara and Heidi

The Superficial / September 24, 2012

Christina Hendricks & Kat Dennings Had Giant Breasts At The Emmys, Let’s Look At Them

Christina Hendricks and Kat Dennings were at the Emmys last night where, granted, they didn’t win any awards honoring their hard work and dedication to their craft, but this morning a bunch of dudes on the Internet went, “Damn, those tits are huge,” so I call that a win for modern feminism. Girl power!

The Superficial / September 24, 2012

Gwyneth Paltrow Goes To The Emmys:
A Profile in Courage

I sat this one on the back burner yesterday to focus on Arnold’s new book, but the latest issue of GOOP graced the Internet as it does every Thursday, and as a special treat to all you everyday moms out there, Gwyneth Paltrow shares her Emmys preparation process which literally starts in Paris and end…

The Superficial / September 23, 2011

The 63rd Annual Primetime Emmy Awards

Let’s be honest and admit to ourselves that this year’s Emmys coverage peaked with Peter Dinklage struttin’, so let’s bring this puppy in for a landing and always keep those tiny little struttin’ photos in our hearts. On that note, here’s the rest of last night’s red carpet photos featuring a whole bunch of people…

The Superficial / September 19, 2011

Olivia Munn Really Wants You To See Her Side Boob and Other News

Posted by Photo Boy
- Eliza Doolittle should have had Olivia Munn’s seat instead. [Hollywood Tuna]
- Michelle Williams dreams of quitting acting while promoting her latest acting projects. [Huffington Post]
- Sinead O’Connor is suicidal over her Single Seeking Anal classified ad. [Dlisted]
- Heidi Klum and Seal recycled their Emmy outfits from the…

Photo Boy / September 19, 2011

Charlie Sheen Gave Ashton Kutcher Advice At The Emmys

“Here’s my pitch boiled down to its purest essence: You hand me all the money in your wallet.”
A more remorseful and somber (Read: Broke and therefore deficient in porn stars/hookers.) Charlie Sheen has been kissing Two and a Half Men’s ass over the past week even going so far as to say he’d love…

The Superficial / September 19, 2011

Nina Dobrev Won The Emmys

In a sane and just world, a teen vampire drama riding the Sparkle-wiener coattails of Twilight would have no business being at the Emmys, but then again, they invited the gold-diggers from Real Housewives, so it’s really anyone’s game at that point. Anyway, here’s The Vampire Diaries star Nina Dobrev who if you locked me…

The Superficial / September 19, 2011

Gwyneth Paltrow Will Grace You With Her Stomach Now

After whatever governing body saw fit to grant her a Creative Arts Emmy for her Glee cameo, you know the one Lindsay Lohan tried to sue over, Gwyneth Paltrow decided to grace us, the little people, with a glimpse of her midriff, presumably glistened and moistened ever so softly from fairies she picked in her…

The Superficial / September 19, 2011

Peter Dinklage Should Win Every Award Show Every Time

He did not just strut. — SQUEEEEE!
Seriously, if you don’t want to snatch that up in a burlap bag and force it to mix you drinks from a tiny bar inside your fridge, you’ve lost all sense of child-like wonder. I don’t even want to know you.
Photos: Getty

The Superficial / September 18, 2011
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