Ellen DeGeneres

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Yo, What’d Y’All Do To #BBare? Jigga’s Gone SOFT!

Justin Bieber is sorry, y’all. He’s gonna be super-sensitive from here on out, boo. Totes for realsies. More »


Justin Bieber Can’t Get Laid Because He Looks Like Ellen Now

“Are you my mommy?”
“Shut up and smile, twinky. I eat twat-farts like you for breakfast.”

Posted by Photo Boy

Most of the time when I’m thinking about the world and why it’s awful, Justin Bieber comes up. Today must be the exception, because according to “onlookers,” who in no… More »


Selena Gomez Walks Around Her House Naked

After every awful post about child predators, or in this case the authors who defend them, I like to try and bring eveybody back to a happy place. So here’s Selena Gomez telling Ellen she likes to walk naked around her new, Justin Bieber-free house. As for what you’re supposed to do with that information,… More »



Shia LaBeouf Just Had An Existential Crisis, You Guys, He’s All Better

For roughly two years now, counting the Marilyn Manson and butterflies on his penis days, Shia LaBeouf has been a walking performance art twatwaffle who mostly was just plagiarizing anything he could get his hands on. Eventually all of that culminated in him being arrested at a Broadway performance of Cabaret for slapping people’s assesMore »


Gwyneth Paltrow’s Talking About Her Vagina Again

While promoting Iron Man 3, Gwyneth Paltrow got shitfaced drunk and called into an Australian radio show where she elaborated on her comments to Ellen about shaving her 70s bush to make her ass window red carpet look work. So here she is on Ellen talking about her shorn lady drapes again because Gwyneth Paltrow… More »


Gwyneth Paltrow Sacrificed Her 70’s Bush For You, The Ungrateful Masses

Posted by Photo Boy

Apparently getting crowned World’s Most Beautiful Woman comes at a terrible price as Gwyneth Paltrow recently found out just before unleashing her side-butt on the world at the LA premiere of Iron Man 3. Her vagina fro, while healthy and fortified by the natural compounds of her daily buckwheat… More »


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