Demi Moore


More Demi Moore stories

Demi Moore Gave Rumer Willis A Gun Cake

Apparently, everyone’s supposed to lose their shit over Demi Moore giving Rumer Willis a gun cake for her 26th birthday even though it’s supposedly a callback to her photo shoot with Tyler Shields. I’m a wiener-bitch liberal when it comes to guns, and even I don’t see the problem here. Not to mention, Demi’s one… More »

Demi Moore In A Bikini: A Cautionary Tale

There was a time when Demi Moore was the highest-paid actress in Hollywood, pulling in unheard amounts of money until she made Striptease and fell off the face of the planet with her mountains of cash. Mountains of cash that she spent on the best plastic surgery in Hollywood, yet still has a stomach that… More »

Demi Moore Wants Ashton Kutcher To Pay Alimony, Says They Weren’t Separated When He Cheated

After settlement talks over the past year apparently haven’t work out, Demi Moore has filed her own divorce papers from Ashton Kutcher and is suing him for child support along by claiming they were not separated when he cheated on her with Sara Leal in Vegas. Radar reports:

Moore cites the date of… More »

Lindsay Lohan’s Sucking Money Out of Ashton Kutcher, Too

“I wonder if this teleprompter’s rich…”

Because Ashton Kutcher needs more comparisons to Charlie Sheen in his life, the National Enquirer reports Lindsay Lohan has been using him like an ATM, too, because getting up on time and not doing drugs is hard. You wouldn’t understand:

Although their brief romance was… More »

Demi Moore’s Daughters Want A Restraining Order Against Her, Like Ashton Kutcher Better

Demi Moore’s daughters Rumer, Scout and Tallulah Willis are apparently considering getting a restraining order against her because Demi won’t stop leaving them crazy messages about them liking Ashton Kutcher better than her because he actually shows up to their special events and doesn’t just bolt without even talking to them when no one’s slipping… More »

Joe Manganiello Is Not Banging Demi Moore

Apparently there’s been a rumor going around that Joe Manganiello’s been hooking up with Demi Moore which he really wants people to know is not happening. Because, seriously, who does that? Not counting douches in trucker hats. Those aren’t people. Via E! News:

“There is 100 percent zero truth to that,” Manganiello told… More »

Kim Kardashian Dedicated ‘Whip It’ To Demi Moore At Elton John’s Oscar Party

Apparently Kim Kardashian is still salty about the time Demi Moore called her out for using the word pimp on Twitter which is surprising considering it got Kim’s name in the press, her entire reason for living. Anyway, Kim decided to be a bitch about it if you believe this report from Janet Charlton’s HollywoodMore »

Bruce Willis Told Demi Moore To Go To Rehab, She Chose Penis Cake And Whip-Its

Shortly before Demi Moore somehow found herself in the hospital after sucking back whip-its and K2 Spice on a stomach full of nothing but Red Bulls, Bruce Willis reportedly urged her to go to rehab. So just assume that conversation involved both of their daughters looking like the goddamn Elephant Man so they’ve been through… More »

Demi Moore Tried To Bang Zac Efron

More details continue to fly into our nostrils out of the whipped cream can that is Demi Moore’s life. This time around, we learn she’s been actively pursuing Zac Efron in a desperate attempt to see if his penis will reverse the effects of time which would make these sketches in my dream journal eerily… More »

Rumer Willis Is Already Partying Again

Rumer Willis just watched Demi Moore get taken away in an ambulance after going on a whip-it and K2 Spice bender because she’s too beautiful to buy real drugs, I have no fucking clue, so of course Rumer was already out hitting SAG parties by the weekend, according to E! News:

Meanwhile, over… More »

Demi Moore Was Smoking K2 Spice With Rumer

As Demi Moore’s Fuck You, Ashton Kutcher Drug Binge and Nitrous Extravaganza continues to unfold, we now know that Rumer was there the whole time, and that the two were most likely smoking something called K2 Spice and not salvia because apparently I’m the only one who still drinks all his anger and frustration into… More »

Demi Moore Was Smoking ‘Something’ Now

If you heard about Demi Moore doing whip-its and went, “Ha! Are we going to find out she was doing salvia next?” We’re finding out she was probably doing salvia next. People reports:

Demi Moore was having convulsions and “burning up” at her Los Angeles home after she smoked an unknown substance, according… More »

Ashton Kutcher Seems Really Concerned About Demi Moore

With Demi Moore in the hospital for doing whip-its of all things, you’d just assume Ashton Kutcher might be a tad concerned for the woman he was married to before detonating their relationship with his wandering cock. Turns out he has not a fuck to give because TMZ has footage of him fist-pumping with a… More »

Demi Moore Was Doing Whip-Its

Apparently Demi Moore was knocking back whip-its the night she was hospitalized because she’s 18 and living in her parent’s basement while working a dead-end job at Arby’s. A fact I’ve secretly suspected for years now, but lacked the journalistic integrity to follow through on. Gotta start trusting my gut more. TMZ reports:

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Demi Moore Hospitalized For ‘Exhaustion’ And Yes, Exhaustion Means Drugs

For those of you wondering how Demi Moore’s holding up after her divorce from Ashton Kutcher, not fucking well. TMZ reports she was hospitalized last night for substance abuse which her reps are actually trying to spin as “exhaustion” because no one hears that and goes, “So drugs, right? It’s drugs.” Never happens. Anyway, RadarOnlineMore »

Ashton Kutcher Will Start With Lea Michele

A freshly-shaved, and equally as freshly-divorced, Ashton Kutcher surprisingly showed his face at the premiere of New Year’s Eve last night because, let’s be honest, anyone who actually wants to watch the cinematic equivalent of every homogenized actor in Hollywood taking turns shitting in a bag for a ridiculous paycheck really just wants to see… More »

Demi Moore NOT Dating The Walking Wax Statue

But he looked so straight… powdering men’s shoulders.

Earlier today, RadarOnline reported that Demi Moore had rebounded from her divorce with “celebrity groomer” Scott-Vincent Borba who I hope enjoyed all that publicity from being called Donny Osmond’s Sweaty Gay Statue because Demi’s people are already denying the relationship. Us Magazine reports:

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This Is Demi Moore’s Rebound?

Now that Demi Moore’s exhausted all of Kaballah’s options in saving her marriage to Ashton Kutcher – I’m genuinely shocked the marital campfire didn’t work. Shocked, I say! – she’s apparently rebounded with “beauty mogul” Scott-Vincent Borba (above) which absolutely can’t be right. I don’t care if their skin was manufactured in the same plant. More »

Ashton Kutcher Tried To Buy Demi Moore A Car To Save Their Marriage

Shortly before their inevitable divorce was announced, Ashton Kutcher reportedly bought Demi Moore a $100,000+ Lexus to save their marriage which is stupid because it’s not like she can’t buy one herself. Then again, I honestly don’t know what Demi Moore does these days and her face is 80% polymer, so maybe she can’t. Strike… More »

Ashton Kutcher Seriously Using Divorce To Market Chime.In

Yesterday, when Demi Moore announced she’s divorcing Ashton Kutcher, I joked that him posting his reaction to Chime.In was an opportunistic cash grab seeing as he’s an investor and a social media whorehose. Turns out that was entirely the case because here’s a mass email I received shortly after the divorce announcement from Dana Berkowitz… More »

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