Posts tagged "Courtney Stodden"

Courtney Stodden Sold Her Sex Tape For $1 Million

Courtney Stodden sold her sex tape for $1 million, and she doesn't even have sex in it. I WANT MY COUNTRY BACK.

By: The Superficial / April 30, 2015

Courtney Stodden Is Shopping A Sex Tape, Nature.. Found A Way

Courtney Stodden is shopping around a solo sex tape because no one wants to see Doug Hutchison's balls.

By: The Superficial / April 28, 2015

BEST OF 2014: Courtney Stodden Plays The Field

Welcome to the most wonderful time of the year where we get to recycle old posts with high click-through rates because a amazingly profitable portion of you are nothing but lemmings with erections to us. I don't even have to write anything, that's how foolproof this is. Spurgle blargle wogga wogga. See? That was nonsense.

By: The Superficial / December 26, 2014

‘Brazilian Candidate? Look At Me Topless In My Underwear!’

Yesterday, Lindsay Lohan was all over the place after she tweeted then untweeted an endorsement for a Brazilian presidential candidate with ties to cocaine smuggling because of course. So what quicker way to change the subject than by posting a topless photo of yourself to Instagram? Which might work if the entire Internet hasn't seen

By: The Superficial / October 23, 2014

And Now Back To BEWBS (Specifically Courtney Stodden And Mozart Ones)

For the sake of this post, let's pretend I have two types of readers because broad generalizations are fun and easy. There are the thinkers and the boob lookers, and like any good parent, I love both of you equally. (To your face. Privately? I've plotted one of your deaths. Again, like a good parent.)…

By: The Superficial / October 15, 2014

And Now Back To Courtney Stodden’s Breasts

It was getting close to if not already past the time to wrap Courtney Stodden in a shower curtain and toss her in an Internet landfill next to Weston Cage (Remember Weston Cage?). But then she did something remarkable by showing everyone how low her implants are sagging, and the whole site lit up like…

By: The Superficial / September 22, 2014

And Now Courtney Stodden’s Breasts

Originally, I was going to write a post about Jonathan Dwyer head-butting his wife for not having sex with him, but then I saw these pics of Courtney Stodden's breasts and decided we needed 30 photos of them because they look all weird. As for which of those topics would've opened a more beneficial dialog,…

By: The Superficial / September 19, 2014

Courtney Stodden & Doug Hutchison Are Engaged Again Despite Never Getting Divorced

Courtney Stodden has been rapidly fading from relevancy yet is remarkably determined to not just throw in the towel and do porn which makes her a better person than Farrah Abraham. Then again, so is this bagel. Anyway, in a successful (because I'm a cheap clickwhore) Hail Mary pass to get back in the press,…

By: The Superficial / August 12, 2014

Courtney Stodden’s In A Lettuce Bikini Again

Because shoving giant cartoon tits into a lettuce bikini is the most effective, if not the only way to truly save the animals, here's Courtney Stodden handing out veggie dogs at a PETA event on Capitol Hill yesterday. You'll also notice her mother keeps seductively rubbing Courtney's stomach because moms do that and go, "Hey,…

By: The Superficial / July 17, 2014

Courtney Stodden Rubbed Her Giant Cartoon Breasts All Over The Dead

As you can see, my headline was sadly literal because here's Courtney Stodden at the Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery where she took selfies of her plastic tits in front of the graves of Marilyn Monroe, Eva Gabor, and Farrah Fawcett because she's (almost) just like them. There's just one tiny little thing missing... Photo:

By: The Superficial / March 31, 2014

Courtney Stodden’s Cartoon Breasts Tried To Ride A Bike, It Didn’t Go Well

Riding a bike requires balance and coordination, so what better place for Courtney Stodden's disproportional cartoon tits while a kid on a BMX bike flies around distracting her? It's almost like whoever shot this wanted Courtney to fall which, wait a minute, you did, didn't you? Ha! You wacky perverts. What'll you think up next?

By: The Superficial / March 20, 2014

Courtney Stodden’s Breasts Are On TV Again

Here's Courtney Stodden fulfilling her purpose in life, and no, I'm not talking about starring on reality television. I'm talking about being a mannequin in a store window again. I don't know who made the wish that made her rill, but they need to cut that shit out. Or give me the magic words for…

By: The Superficial / March 12, 2014

It’s Courtney Stodden Doing Cartwheels In A Bikini

Courtney Stodden has been trying to be a lot of things she's not lately: A brunette, a legitimate celebrity with a viable career, and someone who should sing in public. Which is why it's nice to see her return to her original product description of a dumb blonde with huge cartoon tits. That's all people…

By: The Superficial / March 5, 2014

Courtney Stodden’s Implants Are Playing The Field

By all means, Courtney Stodden should've skyrocketed to fame by now, yet something seems to be holding her back. And that something is apparently watching men attempt to interact with her cartoon breasts on dates because here she is on the beach yesterday with another suitor after going out for dinner just three days ago…

By: The Superficial / January 31, 2014

BREAKING: Courtney Stodden’s Banging Someone Under 40

Kevin James, you rascal... Somehow we've made it four weeks into 2014 without a single Courtney Stodden post which probably explains why she went on a date last night with talent manager David Weintraub whose client list includes pretty much anyone who's been on a VH1 reality show and Scott Disick, so right away you…

By: The Superficial / January 28, 2014

BEST OF 2013: Courtney Stodden’s Giant Cartoon Breasts Were Topless

Welcome to the time of year where we repackage old posts you guys clicked the shit out of in hopes that you'll do that all over again so we don't have to step away from our loot. I'm not even going to sugar coat what's happening here. Unlike this ham. Leave us! DECEMBER After getting

By: The Superficial / December 31, 2013

BEST OF 2013: Courtney Stodden’s New Implants

Welcome to the time of year where we repackage old posts you guys clicked the shit out of in hopes that you'll do that all over again so we don't have to step away from our loot. I'm not even going to sugar coat what's happening here. Unlike this ham. Leave us! JUNE Sometime i…

By: The Superficial / December 27, 2013

BREAKING: The Hair Above Courtney Stodden’s Cartoon Tits Is A Different Color

We interrupt my liberal shenanigans for a special announcement: Courtney Stodden dyed her hair. As to what color her hair was before, or even what it is now, I have no fucking clue. But they guy who sold these to me said it was different, so that seems like more than enough research. My work…

By: The Superficial / December 12, 2013

It’s Courtney Stodden Sunbathing Topless

Remember Courtney Stodden? That chick who was with that guy and then, I dunno, some stuff? Well, here she is conveniently sunbathing topless in front of the "paparazzi" who happened to show up on an empty beach and find her there just checking her phone and holding her giant cartoon tits so their weight don't…

By: The Superficial / December 10, 2013

Your Dad Wants To Have A Talk With You About His New Girlfriend, Courtney Stodden

Come on in, son, have a seat. Listen, I know you're all grown up now and have a family of your own, but that doesn't mean you still can't have a talk with your old man. As you know, it's been a few months since your mother passed, and well, I've met somebody. Have you…

By: The Superficial / November 22, 2013
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