Antonio Banderas


More Antonio Banderas stories

Antonio Banderas & Melanie Griffith Are Divorcing

“My God, it’s finally happened! Hold me in your penis arms, Sylvester.”

Late Friday afternoon (Read: Post-Giving-Fucks O’Clock.), Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas announced they’re getting a divorce which is either the result of him banging Sharon Stone, or Melanie Griffith getting way too much plastic surgery – that made him bang Sharon… More »

Michael Fassbender Is Assassin’s Creed.. Person

Despite being an undersexed recluse who geeks out over seeing Spider-Man finally played by a rail-thin waif boy, I’ve surprisingly never played any of the Assassin’s Creed games. So based on Ubisoft casting Michael Fassbender for the upcoming movie, I’ll just go ahead and assume it’s about an Irish dude who harpoons people to death… More »

Reminder: Michael Fassbender Has A Giant Penis, Will Spank You With A Ping-Pong Paddle

“Now, before we begin, how attached are you to your cervix?”

Michael Fassbender is the cover interview for the June 2012 issue of GQ, so if you’re in the mood for reading about the trials and tribulations of everyone making jokes about how huge your penis is while the writer awkwardly tries not… More »

Salma Hayek’s Cleavage is Out Again

I could write a whole bunch of words about the Cannes premiere of Puss in Boots that reach deep into your soul, creating a sense of childlike glee and wonder you’ve long since forgotten, but the important thing is Salma Hayek has gigantic breasts, yet somehow I still noticed Antonio Banderas shown up shit-blasted out… More »

Melanie Griffith’s pool-boy looks familiar

Melanie Griffith looks damn good for a fifty-year-old woman. This shot was taken in Buenos Aires over the weekend where Melanie helped debut her husband Antonio Bandera’s new fragrance Blue Seduction. Based on this picture I’m guessing it’s cologne for magicians or people with no depth perception. But if it attracts cougars like Melanie Griffith,… More »