Alex Rodriguez


More Alex Rodriguez stories

J-Lo and A-Rod Are Already Talking Marriage

Their relationship is escalating faster than Shia Lebeouf at a bowling alley. More »

I Guess We’re Looking At Jennifer Lopez On A Date Now

JLo and A-Rod are definitely dating. Or just had dinner, but we’re still totally allowed to do the stupid nickname thing now. More »

Jennifer Lopez & Alex Rodriguez Will J-Rod The A-Lo Now

So Jennifer Lopez has been with Alex Rodriguez this whole time. – *looks around, quietly slides post into ‘Drake is on the DL’ file* – What? More »

A-Rod’s New Lover Seems Like A Nice Guy

“Dude, I can still see the parts that look a vagina. Knock it off.”

When we last left A-Rod, he was throwing a gladiator bikini party and/or making them stand guard in the trees around his island compound. I go back and forth. Anyway, after forcing them to battle lions wearing nothing but… More »

Alex Rodriguez Likes Parties About Gladiators. BIKINI PARTIES!

Now that Alex Rodriguez is single again, he has no choice but to lounge around his mansion in Miami while tons of women do cartwheels in bikinis. Or at least that’s what it looks like until you realize they’re all built like Schwarzenegger, and he’s got them posted in trees like gorilla sentries. So either… More »

A-Rod Is A Master Of Stealth

Cameron Diaz Still Has Insane Man Arms

“Wow, those are testicles!” – That guy. In the orange. Sorry, should’ve been more specific.

If you found yourself wondering, “Gee, does Cameron Diaz still have freakish, almost Madonna-esque guns causing grown men to do a double take of fear?” the answer is yes. Yes, she does. And to demonstrate just how strong… More »

Cameron Diaz is Madonna Now

Because A-Rod clearly prefers a strong, unyielding arm up the anus, here’s a ripped Cameron Diaz leaving a Venice Beach gym yesterday. Unfortunately for her, I can see the semblance of a breast so this relationship was doomed before it even began. It’s a hard truth, but someone has to tell her before she spends… More »

Bill Clinton Hangs Out With Cameron Diaz and A-Rod. Why Not?

“We’re going streaking!”

For reasons known only to a Macanudo and a butler who can keep a secret, Bill Clinton joined Cameron Diaz and Alex Rodriguez for dinner in Miami last night. Now, I’m not suggesting he offered A-Rod one million dollars to sleep with Cameron Diaz, but I’m also not suggesting it… More »

George Clooney Surprises Cameron Diaz

Did I say George Clooney? Clearly I meant Jesus.

George Clooney paid Cameron Diaz and Alex Rodriguez a surprise visit in Mexico yesterday proving my theory that he sits in trees all day waiting for hot chicks to show up. Except in this case old age failed him because it’s only Cameron Diaz… More »

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