a href=”/”>
Vanity Fair has bought the rights to publish the first official pictures of Suri Cruise, but to hold you over until they do this is supposedly a shot of Suri taken as photographers were getting aerials of Tom Cruise’s mansion. I don’t doubt that it’s Suri, I just can’t see or make her out. It might as well be a picture of a tree with the caption: “Suri Cruise hides behind a tree.” Clearly there are colors involved here. And shapes. But the genetic composite of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes? I don’t think I have the testicular fortitude to make such wild and crazy allegations.
Smaller even less clear shots of Suri at the window after the jump.
I swear until crazy ass herbie posted that closer pic I couldn’t see ANY baby in those pics! I thought all of you seeing babies in diapers were definitely on some good drugs or something.
Oh yeah, @19, I totally agree w/you on releasing the baby pics! Why not just show the kid like Gwenyth Paltrow or Brooke Shields did? That way people aren’t hounding you 24/7 to get a shot of the kid! WTF?!
Oh well, what do you expect from someone who cherishes the phallus so much.
So THAT’S what Xenu’s offspring looks like!
Beautiful house, though.
Anyway, Paris got bitten by her kinkajou Tuesday. Baby Luv is no my favorite animal in L.A.
http://spankcheeks.blogspot.com/2006/08/baby-luv-takes-bite-outta-skank.html
#51
why did TC and Dead Eyes Holmes not show off “the baby” yet….cos TCLTC and he is a publicity whore like Parasite Hilton…
just look at the attention he is getting FOR FREE…
TCLTC….can’t wait for the Biography due this fall….maybe that will drive him outta the closet
I think we should call Katie, sorry Kate, Rapunzelle from now on. Looks like she’s been locked in that room for weeks. Pale skin, black dress…notice how everyone is saying (in a zombie voice) “Yes, I’ve seen baby Suri. Baby Suri is beautiful” but nobody has made mention of Katie? Strange – she is scarier in this picture than the lady from the ring – you know who I’m talkin’ ’bout, bitches…the not the little girl, but the woman in the mirror who jumps off of the cliff—eeeek!
Tastes like chicken.
http://poetry.rotten.com/infantiphagia/taboo1.html
What’s with Katie looking all forlorn in the window? Did she just find out that TCLTC? Woe is Katie.
After looking at the pic again, it reminds me of one of those dolls kids are sent home with from school to teach them about taking care of babies!!!
Do I detect lobster pincers on that kid? Are those bug eyes with mandibles for a mouth? It does have an aura of the end to some horror movie. Kate looking forlornly out the window, realizing in the void of her offspring’s black eyes the destroyer of humanity she has birthed into our plane of existence. And Tom in the background, cradling the little hellspawn, cooing, “Isn’t she beautiful, breeder? Have you ever seen anything so delightful? She eclipses the atomic bomb in glory, our little apocalypse…” Then he tenderly unbuttons his shirt and allows the little crab creature to suckle off his Scientologized teat.
PEOPLE-help a chick out , can someone please explain to me how you’re seeing anything here, all I see is blackness. SERIOUSLY, can someone walk me through what steps to take to see what you all are seeing, cuz I’m all left out in the cold here. HEEEELP!!
#50, “rich stupid bitch living the party lifestyle and hasn’t done dick to deserve it ”
Umm, correction here- Paris has not only done dick, she’s gone above and beyond her dick quota for the next 8 billion years.
Don’t really give a fuck about this story but I did laugh at all you idiots that thought #9 was real.
#59 – BRILLIANT AND HILARIOUS!
I now care even less!
http://www.VeryLiberating.com
don’t u mean that suri cruise is alive and FOZZY??? WOKAWOKAWOKA!!
http://popculturepundit.blogspot.com/
60–top picture–look between the two vertical brown lines. Ignore the lines the window panes are making. The head is on the right, then there’s the body, those are the brownish-parts. Then there’s a blob of white kinda to the left of center–that’s the diaper. does that help? I didn’t see it either at first.
I don’t see it’s wings. Where are it’s wings and pointed tail? I can just barely make out cloven feet.
#60, I’ll help you out, this is what the everyone is seeing basically…
http://www.elpn.com/iane/graphics/exorblood.jpg
67, thanks
aaaahahahahahahahahaha
too funny
Actually, it’s an extreme close-up of Vanessa Redgrave’s privates.
What’s the big deal?
They just won’t bring out little suri until she molts her first exoskeleton, and her new one hardens.
And then TCLTC will eat it, because we all know her loves them real hard.
This doesn’t look right. The person and baby on the right side of the frame look too big behind the window. And on the left hand side of the window, the face of the woman looking out seems to be on a much smaller scale.
I’m scurred
dip dip
I don’t care if that kid grows up to have flowbee bangs and big white teeth like her father, I will NEVER recognize the existence of Suri Cruise as real. NEVER. Not with DNA test results, video footage of Katie birthing, NOTHING. Suri Cruise is not real.
Hey, it’s bigfoot!
Wow, it looks so fake to me. First of all, I can’t make out a baby in the picture. Second, the person/”baby” seems to big in the window.. like they were photoshopped in later. Third, the two closeups look like something out of The Sims lol. But maybe the color is just weird/bad.
Who knows though, maybe *I’m* just seeing things ;)
#32 – You are absolutly right – That baby is too big to be 4 months! That is because it is not tom’s baby, and katie actually had the baby a couple of months ago, and then faked the rest of the pregnancy. They are waiting until the baby is at an age where it is hard to tell its real age to reveal it.
Mystery solved.
it’s ridiculous that the press even ran those pictures.
Kinda reminds me of that scene in Home Alone where Kevin/Macauley Culkin rigged up cardboard characters to dance and move in the front window so no one would know he was alone in the house. Yeah, it’s kind of the same thing.
I think we should take this as a cry of help. But all we can do is take pictures of windows as that baby’s trying to scream, “Help me! My father’s sliding across the floor in his underwear and sunglasses!”
why do people make such a big deal out of them not wanting to have the baby seen or whatever the case may be. im so sick of this suri crap.
She’s a hairy, scaly, green-blooded, diseased, blood sucking little cretin, who was sent by an alien race as the first expeditionary explorer to determine our weaknesses so that they can overwhelm us – she comes from a race of dwellers who have come to our planet to deplete our ketchup supplies…they have been monitoring our television broadcasts for months – see the link below for world exclusive first footage of little Suri sucking on her bottle…enjoy…
http://youtube.com/watch?v=oLmhGb4ZdZo
toilet duck likes to lick dirty assholes
#82…
Actually, my real name is an ancient African name, spelled Owuh Tannassiam..
Say it several dozen tmes out loud so you can get the pronunciation right…
The closer picture (# 45 thanks) is really, really clear. Not to makes jokes, but Suri’s head looks extra large. And not in a funny way, but in a severly retarded or down-syndrome kind of way.
That said, Katie’s face is about the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. I doubt this was of Tom’s doing. It looked like a real cry for help. The brainwashing is wearing off. She’s starting to be aware of what’s going on. Oh, the lambasting she’s probably gotten from TCLTC for trying to watch for helicopters to fly by and save her. Oh, if ever there were a time when Joey needed Dawson’s window to climb into (or out of)…..Poor kid. I mean both of them.
She’s a goose-pimpled, stinking, bald, slimy, gap-toothed, web-footed little interloper, and her race intends to conquer us – her planet is dying and depleted, her people need ketchup to survive – she was placed with Tomkat after their Council of Elders wanted to find a safe place to harbor her, where the male in the family loves the Cock and needs to hide this fact, so there won’t be any suspicion and Suri can conquer the earth and take all of our ketchup back to her planet…
…are you all blind??? am I the only one sitting here in my dirty underwear, not having shaved in 3 days, trying to warn all of you about Suri and her filthy band of alien invaders???
I probably shouldn’t write after several glasses of wine, but WTF…they’re COMING, and Suri is the Antichrist, mark my words….ok bed now…
beyonce Britney spears brad pitt paris hilton jessica alba aishwarya rai ayesha takia colbie caillat music song lyrics buy hot wallpapers