Suri Cruise birth certificate

Superficial / July 10, 2006

of Suri Cruise’s birth certificate which wasn’t filed with the Los Angeles County Clerk until May 8th even though Suri was born on April 18. They also point out some interesting notes about the certificate, like that the “Attendant or Certifier” wasn’t in the room during the delivery and never saw the baby, although she was authorized to sign because the doctor wasn’t available. Additionally, St. John’s Hospital filed the certificate 20 days after the birth as opposed to their usual policy of doing it within 10 days because they needed a signature from the parents or their representative and nobody came in until May 4th. The person who eventually signed was labeled “friend” and the reason they finally came in was because Suri needed a passport and a birth certificate is a prerequisite for one.

I’ve got a birth certificate for Mickey Mouse I threw together in Photoshop but I’m pretty sure that doesn’t prove he exists. There’s something very fishy going on with this child and it’s up to me and my group of rambunctious sidekicks to figure out what.