Here Are All The Trailers From The Boring Ass Super Bowl

If you skipped the Super Bowl last night, you probably spent four hours of your evening way better than I did because people like you and enjoy your company, or you’re just out there getting shit done. Living the dream. (God, I hate you.) But you also missed movie studios dropping $8 billion to condense their trailers into 30 second spots in hopes that maybe your drunk uncle will want to see Olivia Munn’s boobs do some karate-looking shit. Or Matt Damon, who’s also doing karate shit. Basically all of these are karate. Would you like to see some karate?

SUPERHERO SHOOT IN THE FACE!

 

Quips Swordface McQuippy Quips

 

Mutant BEWBS

 

Should’ve Got That Abortion Because There’s No Way Your Kid Doesn’t Want To See This

 

A Movie You Already Saw – BUT WITH BIGGER SHIT

 

Fuck You, Jeremy Renner

 

Oddly Sexual Baby Monkey Dog Thing (Totally seeing this one.)

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Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox