Sting, recently reported to be opening his own strip club, has now asked about setting up a fantasy sex party with notorious orgy organizer Palagia. According to Palagia’s rep, “whenever Sting is in New York, he has looked into checking out one of Palagia’s sexy Eat In parties,” the rep said. “He has been interested in attending the sexy X-rated soirees for months, even asking Palagia herself to throw a special one for him and Trudi to fit their busy schedule.”
So Sting, an internationally rich and famous rock star, has to pay thousands of dollars to see naked women and get laid. This makes almost as much sense as Hilary Duff paying for breast reduction surgery. The only explanation is he’s very very dumb. Or he has no penis. Or his penis is flammable. Hmm, I guess there’s lots of explanations.
Jayne | March 23, 2006 at 1:13 pm
” I’d hit it ”
… a lot.
Cisi | March 23, 2006 at 1:17 pm
Ha! Jayne, that’s exACTly what I was going to write. I SWEAR!
gogoboots | March 23, 2006 at 1:19 pm
EW, Sting is really arrogant and into tantric sex or so I’ve heard. In other words, he’s the biggest perv in the world!
jugsgirl | March 23, 2006 at 1:22 pm
Damn Jane and Cisi -
I wanted to hit it first. But I doubt I could last 8 hours, so you both could get him warmed up for me.
ILovePapaSmurf | March 23, 2006 at 1:24 pm
Well, at least he puts good use to that tantra stuff he does.
Baroness | March 23, 2006 at 1:32 pm
Sting is so goddamn hot.
That is all.
Feed_Me_Chocolate | March 23, 2006 at 1:40 pm
Ew. I knew nothing about his sexual deviance. My respect for him has bombed.
**Weeeeeeeeeeeoooooooooooooooooooo**
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | March 23, 2006 at 1:44 pm
Dear Sting,
I would love to work at your fine titty bar. Please review my resume and let me know when I can start:
5’10, 120 lbs., blonde, 36DD, ass like a 24, blue eyes, I never sweat, have all my teeth (in good condition), I always show up on time and I always pay my house fees, triple jointed, I smell like flowers and I only do drugs when they’re served to me on club-owners’ penises (or is that “peni”?)
Signed,
Lady Delicious
Topaz Vamp | March 23, 2006 at 1:51 pm
#3, since when does being into tantric sex make you a pervert?
Topaz Vamp | March 23, 2006 at 1:52 pm
I mean, yeah, the orgy part makes him a pervert, but not the tantric part.
Binky | March 23, 2006 at 1:57 pm
I heard he also practised voodoo sex with inflatables, but that blew up on him as well.
SuperSpence | March 23, 2006 at 2:10 pm
If you girls are willing to insert large devices made of stucco into your rectums and dance about screaming “I’m queen of the masonry faeries” at the top of your lungs, Sting might be interested in you. Otherwise, you’re just jacking off. But don’t let me stop you.
Italian Stallion | March 23, 2006 at 2:11 pm
Him and Costner should go get massages together so they can wrestle their bald headed champions in good company…..
Spindoc | March 23, 2006 at 2:29 pm
And for YEARS he has been blathering this B.S. to the press about the great love match he has with his wife, and then tried to claim that they would have 7 hour tantric sex encounters. Well yeah, when you’re out boffing strippers for 364 days out of the year, I guess you CAN have a kinky, time consuming encounter with your wife One day outta the year. Go Sting, but be careful out there. Tom Cruise Loves the Cock.
Jacq | March 23, 2006 at 2:31 pm
Gross. I don’t want to hear about his sexual proclivity when I know whatever he does, he does with Trudy. She’s wrinkled and beyond nasty. I just don’t want to hear it ’cause I could never possibly hate on Sting. Hello people – THE POLICE!
Cisi | March 23, 2006 at 2:47 pm
Lucky for you, SuperSpence, my horror at your having rained on my parade was completely eclipsed by your friggin’ hilarious imagery. Thanks. I am still chuckling over that one. You always crack me up. You, too, Spindoc – “Tom Cruise Loves the Cock.” Y’all are some funny mofos. And speaking of funny mofos, I reiterate yesterday’s question: where the hell are Bill Clinton, Laydeebug, and whoever else it was that someone added to my query? I MISS y’all, man!
MeganHarris | March 23, 2006 at 3:25 pm
gotta love Sting.
CheekyChops | March 23, 2006 at 3:27 pm
I’d shag him. He’s tantric. Apparently that’s a good thing. =O
zena marie | March 23, 2006 at 4:12 pm
EEww he’s seedy… he reminds me of Jed Clampett with a British accent, and without the sense of humor.
Cheyenne_1 | March 23, 2006 at 4:16 pm
“Message in a Bottle” was one of my favorite police tracks…
Little did I know that in “…sending out an SOS”, the SOS meant Sexual Orgy Summons”.
Poor Sting… must be awfully bored to be getting into skanky tricks like that.
cibby | March 23, 2006 at 4:49 pm
Sounds like a fun party, Sting!
Nimuë LaMer | March 23, 2006 at 4:57 pm
I hit it…
vanya_k | March 23, 2006 at 5:08 pm
Sting is Still-alive?? Then I must have dreamed the news blurb where he died of AIDS-related dementia and Trudy had his withered body mummified so she could still ride his uh…uh horse.
hafaball | March 23, 2006 at 6:02 pm
The only reason to be rich….to have huge gang bang parties whenever the hell you want…it’s good to be the Sting.
TowelHead | March 23, 2006 at 6:12 pm
To all those who say they’d hit it: picture Sting’s droopy testicles slapping against Trudi’s wrinkled vag. *shudder*
TowelHead | March 23, 2006 at 6:13 pm
To all those who say they’d hit it: picture Sting’s droopy testicles slapping against Trudi’s wrinkled vag. *shudder*
sometimesboy | March 23, 2006 at 6:20 pm
yeah, sting is gettin’ kinda freaky….i just heard he likes to watch kevin costner get his massages…
Catscratch | March 23, 2006 at 6:26 pm
Re: #14
This is what Sting has to say about the claim he made that he could have sex for eight hours:
“
Mars Needs Women! | March 23, 2006 at 6:47 pm
“To all those who say they’d hit it: picture Sting’s droopy testicles slapping against Trudi’s wrinkled vag. *shudder*
right like you all will never get older!!!
Fight it all you want AGE HAPPENS….to all!
BarbadoSlim | March 23, 2006 at 6:59 pm
What was that song?….ah, “Muder by numbers H..I..V lala..” oh wait it was: one, two, three.
….aaanyway seems as if sir Sting didn’t learn anything from Freddy Mercury, have a nice time pervo.
BarbadoSlim | March 23, 2006 at 7:01 pm
oh and yes Tom Cruise does love the cock, he thinks it’s coooool..
RhinebeckCowboy | March 23, 2006 at 9:56 pm
Palagia is a known slimebucket, Sting a gimme, but the one we should concerned about is the ADA (assistant district attorney, dumb-asses) chick who attends Palagia’s “Eat-Ins”.
Doesn’t the judiciary / law enforcement have something going on about not indulging in activities that open you up (ha ha) to blackmail?
TheLusciousDeluxe | March 23, 2006 at 9:57 pm
I didn’t know the elderly still liked to have sex.
TheLusciousDeluxe | March 23, 2006 at 9:58 pm
I didn’t know the elderly still liked to have sex.
NaughtyBits74 | March 24, 2006 at 11:38 am
Isn’t Sting like a 103 years old by now?
ferret1 | March 24, 2006 at 12:00 pm
Who cares if he knows tantric sex? He now looks like Kelly McGillis’ Amish dad in “Witness”, and he probably smells like that guy too.
gogoboots | March 24, 2006 at 12:14 pm
Just look at him, he’s like one of those weird British pedophiles. He just does tantric cause he thinks that’ll make him more sexy, hence he is a pervert!
Caught Dead In That Dress | March 24, 2006 at 3:00 pm
#37, as opposed to all those normal american peadophiles…?
HughJorganthethird | March 24, 2006 at 3:00 pm
I hope there is a defibulator located nearby during Stings nasty little sicko parties, cause he’s older than dirt. The epitome of dirty old man. And his wife’s face closely resembles a catchers mitt.
That is all.
georgina-elizondo | March 26, 2006 at 9:40 am
The worst thing that I see in all these happenings is how Sting lost all respect with his immaterial I.
What a pity, esecially for police fans like me. :(
Watch out with Public Opinion…As well as it constructed you, it can destroy you.
georgina-elizondo | July 3, 2006 at 2:47 am
I was reading Sting’s book (broken music-autobiography), and maybe now I understand the causes of his deviant behavior.
It said he had a very unhappy childhood. His first disfunctional family gave him very unhappy feelings, and perhaps Sting is a very unhappy person, no matter if he had all material things to be a happy man. Also immaterial as an excellent song writer.
Anyway, he is an artist and I can understand now his deviant if this information of his behavior is real and true.
Still have my doubts on it…
georgina-elizondo | July 5, 2006 at 12:33 am
If this information is true, anyway, I still loving you Sting, especially when you were playing with The Police and in your first solo works. I still loving ‘Saint Agustine in Hell, and I understand the meaning better after I read you book.
You have to thanks Stewart Copeland, cause he discovered your talent as a singer and showed you the key to open the correct door to expanded it…
HollywoodSnark | January 9, 2007 at 4:27 pm
yeah, and could the world-famous orgy organizer be more discreet?
Jaqie | June 8, 2008 at 8:39 pm
Trudie Styler is a talentless, husband stealing, eco-hypocryt.
I LOL’ed when some one said just picture Sting’s hairy droopy balls slapping Trudies old Va-jay-jay eeewww. Not to mention that you would think Sting has had every kind of VD known to man with all the call girl/prostitutes/strippers he has been with. He probably has more crabs than Joe’s crab shack!