STFU About Guns, Bill O’Reilly

**I chose this picture of Bill O’Reilly mansplaining something idiotic to a woman worth $3.1 billion for a reason**

When he’s not sexually harassing female coworkers, strangers, and (probably) his buddies’ daughters, Bill O’Reilly is spouting his fuckboy diatribes on logical thinking via his blog. That’s right, since being fired from FOX for being a pervy asshole, O-Town has been pushing his racist, sexist, and rootin’ tootin’ gun lovin’ agenda through WordPress while sitting at home in his underwear. (I would know, I too live that bloglyfe, and this is the universally standard work uniform.)

Yesterday Bill decided to weigh in on the shooting in Vegas. Instead of coming to the realization that maybe the 2nd Amendment should be —oh, I don’t know — updated to address the fact that guns have come a long way from muskets that take three minutes to reload, Bill chalks the tragedy up by saying, “This is the price of freedom.”

I’m going to source out his original post because I have to, but please be leery of giving this guy the clicks…

Once again, the big downside of American freedom is on gruesome display. A psychotic gunman in Las Vegas has committed the worst mass murder in U. S. history. 64-year-old Stephen Paddock, who lived in Nevada, began firing from a hotel window about 10pm Pacific time last night. His targets were folks attending a music festival below him. When it was all over, more than 50 human beings lay dead, 400 plus wounded. Paddock apparently killed himself as police closed in on him.

The murderer had a number of deadly weapons in his room and you can count on the gun control debate to ramp up.

But having covered scores of gun-related crimes over the years, I can tell you that government restrictions will not stop psychopaths from harming people. They will find a way.

Public safety demands logical gun laws but the issue is so polarizing and emotional that little will be accomplished as there is no common ground.

The NRA and its supporters want easy access to weapons, while the left wants them banned.

This is the price of freedom. Violent nuts are allowed to roam free until they do damage, no matter how threatening they are.

The Second Amendment is clear that Americans have a right to arm themselves for protection. Even the loons. (source)

This is why Bill O’Reilly is a fuckboy. He panders to his readers, who pay a “premium membership” fee to even comment on his blog posts, perpetuating this moronic ideology that gun control is a black-and-white issue and making sure that dissenting information doesn’t permeate his firewall without a $9.99 monthly fee.

He’s basically throwing his hands up in the air and saying, “I pray for the families of this extremely common tragedy, but brace yourselves for people trying to be proactive in avoiding it in the future! Goddamn liberals! I have no solutions! Everybody scream!” I’m extremely curious as to what “government restrictions” Bill O’Reilly has seen fail over the years, because, if anything, we’ve only been removing restrictions or letting them be paid away by the NRA… *erm* expire and fail to be renewed.

Newsflash to my right-wing readers that come through to check out this blog’s T&A while taking dumps: Most liberals don’t give a shit if you have guns. I grew up with guns. They’re fun as hell, but I can live without some of them. Especially ones that are literally designed for killing crowds of people.

Your argument for keeping assault rifles around fucking sucks, too. I learned the phrase “life is unfair” in kindergarten when Corey Johnson kicked paint on some kid’s pants after he wouldn’t give up his Nerf gun. Nobody got to play with the Nerf gun after that incident. It was tough titties for everyone else because Corey Johnson was an asshole. Corey Johnson continued to be an asshole for the rest of kindergarten, high school, and his life. Corey Johnson is what Bill O’Reilly would call a “loon,” but Bill O’Reilly thinks it’s fine that Corey can buy automatic weapons.

Also, contrary to what Bill O’Reilly thinks about “the left,” may of “us” recognize it would be impossible to get rid of all the guns in America like Australia did. We barely can make it out of the house to pick up Chinese food or vote, so I think it’s safe to say nobody is going to be bringing their guns to the gun burning rally in a Walmart parking lot.

If Bill O’Reilly wasn’t a complete fuckboy, maybe he’d bring up the fact that the only constant in all of these tragedies is an individual who was treated like a piece of shit so much they felt they had to put their money where their mouth is and lash out. I don’t want to have a gun debate anymore. It’s exhausting, and I don’t care anymore. That ship has sailed. It’s like masturbating in an airport bathroom stall (You’ll never finish without being overwhelmed by aggressive shit smells).

I would, however, love to debate how we’ve all turned into a bunch of assholes… mostly because of people like Bill O’Reilly. Maybe if we were nicer to each other in person, people like Stephen Paddock wouldn’t have his panties in so much of a bundle to go as far as raining hundreds of bullets down on a music festival…

Seriously, that person who you gave the finger to while driving to work and called “a fucking fuck” after they accidentally missed that green light earlier today could be the next one. So chill out. Everybody. Nobody knows what they’re doing, and that’s what makes life funny for all of us.