Stephanie Seymour Called The Cops on Boner Boy

July 18th, 2011 // 89 Comments

There was only one way for this tale to end… Page Six reports:

On July 4, Greenwich, Conn., police said, Seymour called them after having a dispute with 18-year-old Peter Jr., which Peter Sr. witnessed. Lt. Richard Cochran said that when police responded, they were told the mother and son had argued because “the son was going to visit with the mom, and the mom canceled.” Cochran said: “It was all civil in nature.”

Stephanie Seymour 911 Transcript – 7/4/2011

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“I told him I was busy, so, so busy… but the erection, always the erection. I can still it hear bumping against the door. My Peter’s a good boy, he’s a good boy, a good boy…”

“Ma’am, I need you to calm down. Take a deep breath, that’s good. Now who has an erection?”

“My son.”

“And what’s he trying to do with it?”

“Right now? Pick the lock. Peter, dear! You’ll get it stuck in there!”

(muffled) “No one cancels a massage appointment on me, mother! Father? Father? Are you in there? Settle this dispute at once or I shall be forced to leave my seed on your doormat!”

“Ma’am. Ma’am? Try to keep him calm, we’ll send a unit right over.”

“Oh, God, Peter! He shoved it through the keyhole! He shoved it through the keyhole!”

(screaming, followed by sound of phone dropping as older man threatens to load a shotgun while shouting “Put that thing away, we’re not repeating Thanksgiving dinner.”)

Photo: Fame, Flynet, Splash News

superficial

  1. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    Snooki's Taint
    Commented on this photo:

    It is so touching to see a Mother & Son this close.

  2. chev70

    Nice tits.

  3. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    JANE
    Commented on this photo:

    THIS IS SO DISTURBING WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!?!?!?!

  4. his name is PETER? hahahaha nuf said

  5. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    Wow
    Commented on this photo:

    Sneaky-reach-around on your mom’s boob? Awwkwardd.

  6. i wonder why she canceled.

  7. Vivian

    incest innuendo ew ew

  8. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    H-Dogg
    Commented on this photo:

    Spanking the Monkey, anyone?

  9. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    dork
    Commented on this photo:

    Freud was right.

  10. Man, I really want to mine some comedy gold out of this one, but everything would fall flat compared to Fish’s actual post.

  11. If she was my mom I might have to consider banging her too. No wonder he was upset not getting to visit her.

  12. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    Jamie
    Commented on this photo:

    Please tell me you Photoshopped that.

  13. nancyanny

    that is one completely visible cameltoe

  14. BJ

    Who the fuck hangs on and kisses their son like that? Swear to God, I thought she was just a cougar when I was looking through these photos. I had to repeatedly remind myself that that’s her SON. No wonder he got a fucking boner, with those huge fucking tits hanging all over him all the time.

  15. Colm

    The best thing in this post:

    “Ma’am, I need you to calm down. Take a deep breath, that’s good. Now who has an erection?”

    “My son.”

    “And what’s he trying to do with it?”

    “Right now? Pick the lock. Peter, dear! You’ll get it stuck in there!”

  16. BJ

    Also, her face in this photo is fucking priceless.

  17. Johnny Pepper

    I would also get a boner if she was my mother, And try to bang her. What would be weird is if he wasn’t trying!

  18. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve got a boner now too

  19. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    sea
    Commented on this photo:

    To me there’s nothing wrong. The kiss is on the cheek and his hand is there just because she turned towards him.

  20. wishbone

    As a Mom of two boys, YUCK. I don’t care if he’s gay or not…this is inappropriate…grabbing her boob?!? wtf….

  21. JustaGuy

    If she was my Mom and she looked that good and was messin with my waist like she is I might just have a hard on too..

  22. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    Commented on this photo:

    In her defense, she is reciprocating his grope with a reach-around of her own. If you’ve never heard the words, “here son, let me finish you off,” then you probably haven’t lived.

  23. Hugh Gentry

    I wish she was helping me with my shorts. Staring at those tits must be torture…

  24. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    maeby
    Commented on this photo:

    Does she actually have a swimsuit top that fits??

  25. Ed

    He just says he’s gay so he can still grope mommy and she thinks it’s less weird.

    • anonymous

      i agree. i think he just says that he is gay because banging your hot mom on a regular basis hasn’t been ok’d by californian law like being gay has.

  26. vitobonespur

    Hmmmm…they DO seem to be inordinately affectionate. Maybe they’re “play-acting” for the paps. Nahhhh…they’re just kinky motherfuckers (no pun intended)!

  27. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    elizabeth
    Commented on this photo:

    wtf

  28. nambla fan

    she raised him with a little game called ‘milk the prostate’

  29. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    Commented on this photo:

    For a mother/son that’s just totally inappropiate and weird as hell. I can’t see the picture been taken out of context either, that is what it looks like. o.o

  30. Venom

    Some creepy fuckers on here with Oedipus complexes.

    And with the shitty education system in this country these days, I expect only about 20% of you to know what I am talking about without having to look it up on Google.

    • anonymous

      Don’t forget 50% of the internet is 75% sure that you are 100% full of shit and had just Googled it up yourself. The other 50% don’t give a fuck.

      • oldfool

        “Father. Yes son. I want to kill you. Mother—I want to !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

      • Venom

        Clearly you are one of the 80% of the idiots I speak of.
        How the fuck could I Google something if I did not know about it or what it was genius?
        God Americans are fucking stupid.

    • Nennykins

      It’s called ridicule. He was ridiculing you. Perhaps you should google that. Douche. ;)

    • anonymous

      venom is just mad because we can clearly see him for the liar he is. his mother still makes him do his chores before bedtime

    • Angus

      @Venom. You don’t have to be on the internet to learn, dumbass. You could have been watching television and got that word to look up. Of course for a dumbass like Venom– that’s TV

  31. Timbelina

    ROTFL! One of your best posts to date. I’m still wiping up the coffee I spat all over monitor as I read the Thanksgiving dinner line :-)

  32. hootieblow

    As a gay guy, i honestly think this kid is f ‘ing sexy. Must..one day…marry..him!!1

  33. KOOL GUY

    HAPPY SUMMER! CHEERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!! TO THE MOTHER &O=SON!!!11111111111

  34. anonym

    if that were my mom, I’d consider some doing some oedipal shit too.

    what a fucking MILF.

  35. Arzach

    Well I don’t see the problem here, the guy has a boner with his mom, I also had a boner with HIS mom

  36. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    ForSure
    Commented on this photo:

    So. Very. Wrong

  37. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    BoobzBoB
    Commented on this photo:

    ?

  38. Skeezix

    Of course she called 911, he’s purportedly gay, and yet he’s having an Oedipal erection emergency.

  39. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    Brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    Woody Allen: I see no problem here.

  40. the captain

    pssssssst: THIS IS HER NIECE, folks.
    (he was born as a boy)

  41. .mmmmm i wanna suck that soft wet pussy

  42. Just a nobody

    Umm…This is sooo wrong, but I can’t help wondering as to what might have happened on thanksgiving night?

    And is Peter Jr. expecting to get a massage from his own mom — with an erection???

  43. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    NOWAY
    Commented on this photo:

    This is soooo DISTURBING! its insets…..has anyone noticed he is touching her breast?C’mon, I’ve never seen a teen age boy be so lovey dovey w their mom. I bet you she breastfed him until he was 12

    • arnieblackblack

      Incest leads to low intellect and the inability to spell ‘incest’ instead of insets and the fear of insects in tents…etc,etc,etc. BTW I have heard the words, “here son let me finish you off…” I love my daddy.

  44. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    NOWAY
    Commented on this photo:

    okay, she is touching his trunk and he is getting a hard on….this is disturbing to watch

  45. 64-Josh Howell III

    Impossible to have boner, plus, it sounds really odd thing.

  46. American

    Pretty much jizzed in my pants when I see her body.

  47. I'm not sure if I'm aroused or ashamed

    The lead in pic is wrong in all kinds of standards of human morality.

    Even chimps don’t have sex with their mothers.

    My god, even the native Hawaiians don’t do that.

    Maybe she’s trying to de-gay him.

  48. Beefarino

    Boner Boy must’ve been the follow up episode to Seinfeld’s Bubble Boy.

  49. Stephanie Seymour Bikini Son Boner
    miguelito
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s hot.

  50. It was the boner police.

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