St. Michael Lohan offers advice to the Spears

Lindsay Lohan’s father Michael Lohan offers some of his recently acquired spiritual advice to the Spears family as they cope with Jamie Lynn’s teenage pregnancy. Michael knows what it’s like to get caught up in the “whirlwind” that comes from having celebrity children. Here’s what he told the Spears, as reported by Extra:

“Stand together,” he insisted. “Stand by each other and don’t let anyone come between you.”

Michael added, “Even if you have to get really like insanely close to your daughter’s unfathomably large breasts for her age, just keep standing by each other. Don’t let anything come between you. Especially pants: The devil’s most sinister form. I rebuke you, pants!”

NOTE: I added some pictures of Lindsay Lohan in black tights just for the hell of it.

Photos: Splash News