Breasts. Sofia Vergara’s Breasts Will Keep The Local Systems In Line.

Yesterday, word got out that Sofia Vergara’s fiance Nick Loeb attacked her at a Miami nightclub on New Year’s Eve resulting in security bouncing him the fuck out. So, of course, the two of them called every photo agency in town yesterday and strolled down to the beach to pretend to be a loving couple while Sofia aimed her giant breasts at the cameras making me forget everything I was just talking about. Who wrote all these words? Show yourself!

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN