Sofia Vergara Will Make it All Better

March 29th, 2011 // 37 Comments

After committing what only be described as “a brutal, ritualistic rape and murder of the human eye” with those Lindsay™ pics, here’s the considerably more palatable Sofia Vergara, also in Venice Beach today, filming a Pepsi commercial. How the preternatural hotness of her breasts didn’t cancel out Lindsay™’s face will forever plague the scientific community. On that note, would it be racist if I said I just ejaculated salsa? What if it’s true? And stings like the chupacabra? Aye, papi!

Photos: INFdaily


  1. Dice Gottfried


  2. Marley

    Sometimes she can look questionable, but she looks really good here. Yum.

    • Cock Dr

      The stylist & makeup artists did a nice job. With soft focus & special lighting that woman’s going to sell the shit out of some Diet Pepsi.
      I love a big sun hat. It can cover up so many bad things.

  3. Sofia Vergara Swimsuit
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh wait…no. No. HERE she looks like a drag queen. A pretty one, but nonetheless…

  4. Mark

    Can’t stand her voice and her annoyingly bad english. Also she’s not really that hawt either.

  5. Colin

    Lindsay™ is the chupacabra, right?

  6. Salsa and guacamole tit dispensers? Perfect woman then. But that voice has to go. At least she a speaks the Anglish

  7. Eric

    This is what a real woman looks like.

  8. Dan

    *whimpers knowing he will never even get a chance to taste some*

  9. The Critical Crassness

    Hint to Fish: Don’t do crypto-zoological jokes unless you have a clear understanding of the creatures habits…..Chupacabra bite, not sting. Having said that, Sofia Vergara looks like the goat you’d use to catch the chupacabra.
    And the thing formerly known as Lindsay Lohan looks like what you have left after the chupacabra shits!

  10. frankw

    “How the preternatural hotness of her breasts didn’t cancel out Lindsay™’s face will forever plague the scientific community. ”

    Maybe it’s because they’re just giant plastic water bags under her skin? Yeah, that’s probably it…

    • dano

      those babies are real. She’s had them since she was a young teen, she’s partly famous for having huge real breasts on a smaller body like that.

    • Vivian

      Because fake ones are that squishy right.

      Yeah. No. They’re all real.

  11. Comparing Sophia Vergara shooting a Pepsi commercial to that last big gallery of Lindsay continuing to look like a train wreck….I just keep thinking “Pepsi vs. Coke.”

  12. DKNY

    Selena Gomez coming out of that Smurf party, 20 years in the future?

  13. richard

    Not one uncovered ass shot …

  14. adolf hitler

    also, you like it in the butt

  15. Sofia Vergara Swimsuit
    Commented on this photo:

    the HELL u doing coverin up that shit, ur 3 garments 2 many

  16. Richard McBeef

    π x 8 inch diameter = 25.133 inches

    Be prepared to lay down over 2 feet worth of lick if you want to circle an areola.

  17. the captain

    she hasn’t figured out how yet.

  18. Sofia Vergara Swimsuit
    Alice is Chained
    Commented on this photo:

    Self confidence much?
    Cover your ass up all day much?
    Chicks got issues between the ears Dr. Phil.

  19. That isn’t sunlight, it’s the glow from her teeth.

  20. Deacon Jones

    I love this woman.

    If I became an overnight rockstar, I would hire the best agent in town and have him immediately call Sofia.

    If she refused, I’d hire a team of mercenaries to take her to my mansion

  21. Aggie

    I love Sofia. She’s so cute and always looks so happy. I also think it’s amazing that she has such huge boobs but never looks slutty.

  22. Sofia Vergara Swimsuit
    Commented on this photo:

    Awesome. I’m glad I bought that exact same swimsuit last month so that she could wear it in front of photographers and make me look like a total asshole in comparison.

Leave A Comment