So Jesse James might be a Nazi
We’ve seen the photo — which reportedly was taken two years ago — and there is no mistaking it’s Jesse. The hat Jesse is wearing is nearly identical to the one Michelle has on in the infamous photos, except for the rope across the front.
In the photo, Jesse is holding up his right hand in a “Heil Hitler” pose … and with his left hand he is sort of covering his mouth with two fingers (almost like mimicking Hitler’s mustache).
For the hell of it, I decided to scope out Sandra Bullock’s Wikipedia page to see if she really is German and ascertain if her vagina is secretly Hitler’s love grotto. What I found instead is that she’s literally the unluckiest woman alive once you discount the whole successful acting career. Check out the shit she’s been through:
Survived a plane crash.
Had a crazed fan try to run over her husband.
Hit head-on by a drunk driver.
Starred in Speed 2.
After looking at that list, finding out her husband was sticking his penis in white power strippers right after winning an Oscar makes perfect sense. On that note, I’m now 90% positive Sandra Bullock will catch a rare disease next week only to learn Michelle Bombshell’s blood is the antidote.