Snooki’s New Teeth Look Fantastic

November 14th, 2012 // 68 Comments
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Posted by Photo Boy

While MTV’s Jersey Shore is finally uttering its death rattle after this season, The Little Ewok That Could spawn super-AIDS is apparently thriving. Not only is she launching another product tailor-made for that sweet 15 year old prostitute demographic, but she’s also achieved the type of middling wealth that buys cosmetic dentistry that falls just above Brazilian concrete butt implants. And in before you say ‘I’d literally rather shove my genitals into a blender than spend another second considering whether or not they actually put veneers on a pig,’ let me show you some examples. BOOM! Snaggle-teeth, where’d they go? And another, shazam! Consider the last minute and forty-two seconds of your life officially murdered. *Punches clock, puts lunchbox under arm, whistles way out the door*

Photo: INFdaily

superficial

  1. dontkillthemessenger

    Might I dare say she actually looks… attractive?

    Ahahahahahahahhaha. I can’t even keep a straight face over the Internet.

  2. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    your mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Quick!! Someone push her!!

  3. Sheppy

    Her slow transformation into a living cartoon is progressing well.

  4. Snooki's Taint

    I have a set of those, they are made from wax.

  5. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Commented on this photo:

    Those teeth are straight out of Primus’ “Wynona’s Big Brown Beaver” video.

  6. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Beer Baron
    Commented on this photo:

    This Season’s Fashion CRAZE: Chocolate coated legs!

  7. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Commented on this photo:

    “I don’t want to get all technical, but basically it smells like a Payless shoe store mixed with overtones of those burps you make after shotgunning a Coke”.

    • mel

      oh man! that’s terrific!
      regarding snooki’s….umm fragrance shall we say? i’m immediately reminded of the putrid stench that grabs your nostrils whenever a truck carrying pigs to the slaughter drives by you. kim kardashian too. or the unpleasant bouquet that greets you as you stroll past the laundry room of your grandpa’s nursing. shit that is….they both no doubt reek like a hot BM.

      the backs of both their heads must be quite familiar with their respective other’s vomit.

  8. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Beer Baron
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s got a mouth full of tic-tacs.

  9. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Beer Baron
    Commented on this photo:

    or Dominoes.

  10. EricLr

    Don’t worry, they’ll be dulled by tequila and semen soon enough.

  11. Crissy

    Those fucking teeefff look disgusting!!! Now, she looks like a 60 year-old lady!

  12. SFRowGuy

    Snooki is looking all sparkly — teeth, hair, eyes, complexion. Must be a post-baby glow.

    • Rapsutin's Evil Twin

      Or a few coats of varnish.

      Really, there’s not enough booze in this world to make me forget this fake-ginger Ewok, but I’ll try my best with what’s available.

  13. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Are you an adult woman with a career, responsibilities, a rational state of mind, and a focus on retirement? Me neither. Buy this.”

  14. alex

    Reminds me of Matt Dillon in There’s Something About Mary.

  15. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Tron
    Commented on this photo:

    You’ve been Snookerized. You’re welcome.

  16. you can glue fake teeth to a Chilean midget and its still a Chilean midget or a new pez dispenser.

  17. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Buffalo Dick
    Commented on this photo:

    Kind of teeth I like to come across…..

  18. Her teeth do look good…unfortunately those new teeth are surrounded by the rest of her!

  19. Get to da choppahs!

  20. USDA Prime McBeef

    most of the time you break the tusks off of piglets pretty soon after they are born. wire cutters work. it’s just dangerous to let them get out of control.

  21. Dick Trickle

    It will be fun to watch all the work she had done with her Jersey Shore money fall apart over the years when she can’t afford the upkeep.

  22. chicka

    “paff me vu pickleffff”

  23. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Gabbie
    Commented on this photo:

    Wtf O_O

  24. Those teeth really round out the natural, authentic look of her hair and eyelashes.

  25. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    hijkmno
    Commented on this photo:

    is she vegan? how else to explain those cheap-ass plastic boots?

  26. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    hijkmno
    Commented on this photo:

    nice Lumineers

  27. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    cagster
    Commented on this photo:

    If I take some, am I gonna have to leave a buck in the tray?

  28. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Natty Ice
    Commented on this photo:

    …”So I says to Jionni, ‘You better fuckin’ stay home and watch that baby because I have some shit to sell to make money for us since you don’t even work.’ He was all like, ‘Whatever’ and I thought that would be a great name for the nailpolish. This one’s called Whatever. And so yeah, that’s how I came up with the name.”

  29. zomgbie

    ugh.
    why not just have one photo of each new tooth.

  30. Daytonadixie

    Does she wash w/dirty dish soap and a bacterial infested sponge?
    SMDH….fcukin gross!!!

  31. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Dimen Burgos
    Commented on this photo:

    shut the fuck up hater -___-

  32. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    JD
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, I get it. Judge Doom from Who Framed Roger Rabbit has aerosolized “the dip.”

  33. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    CVG
    Commented on this photo:

    Zoom feature tells me she hasn’t had the bottom row fixed yet.

  34. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    wabbit teef

  35. lawn

    This somehow makes her look even more like a garden gnome.

  36. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Jentilly
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone remember the Friends episode when Ross over whitened his teeth?

  37. tromba

    Someone PLEASE explain to this thing that it needs to tuck away any money it still has and just walk away. Otherwise…….

  38. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Commented on this photo:

    Obviously she asked for the Nicki Minaj special.

  39. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    name
    Commented on this photo:

    it looks like one tooth

  40. Pleasure O'Reilly

    Do they play chopsticks?

  41. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    skunk
    Commented on this photo:

    creepy

  42. Marvin

    Looks like dentures – they do NOT look like natural teeth.

  43. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Captain Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    Sneaky bitch stole Paula Deen’s dentures

  44. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    suck it
    Commented on this photo:

    her bottom teeth look off

  45. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    ruby
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Chevy Chase

  46. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Mr.fknhappy
    Commented on this photo:

    Bright red hair, nasty fake tan, huge white Gary Busey teeth…this bitch is a fkn mess.

  47. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    Luopis
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like that witch in Wicked

  48. Snooki Veneers Snooki Couture Beauty Producs Line
    KRS
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like Johnny Depp in Tim Burton’s Charlie & the Chocolate Factory.

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