Snooki Spent an Entire Day Ewokbating

So that’s what the can of Pringles is for…

When she’s not revealing how often she “shits her pants,” Snooki wants Jersey Shore viewers to know she also spends a lot of time masturbating which is incredible considering how sexy she is. And did I mention the pants shitting? RadarOnline reports:

The bombshell came out when Snooki, JWOWW and Deena were going to the pharmacy, and Deena said she can’t understand why girls won’t cop to the deed, adding she thinks “it’s healthy.”
Snooki agreed with Deena, telling her, “You work your muscles — remember I did it all day once and couldn’t move?

Look, I’m not going to sit here and judge someone for pleasuring themselves because they’re constantly being rejected by the opposite sex. I hear that happens to people, though I know absolutely nothing of the experience myself. *looks longingly out the window as a single tear streams down his face* I will, however, vomit pure occult blood into this bucket over here and pray to sweet Jesus to cleanse me of every mental image in my mind right now, except for Spider-man. Haha! Butt-sex doesn’t fight crime.

Photos: Splash News