UPDATE: Simon Monjack found dead

May 24th, 2010 // 123 Comments

Brittany Murphy’s husband Simon Monjack was found dead in her Hollywood Home last night. He was discovered by Brittany’s mom which had to be awkward considering all that sex they had on top of Brittany’s money. PopEater reports:

“The preliminary cause of death is natural causes,” Sgt. Louie Lozano told the Associated Press. Another police spokesman, Sgt. Alex Ortiz, said, “We concluded there no signs of foul play or any criminal activity involved.”
Ortiz said that the coroner’s office was taking over the investigation because criminal activity had been ruled out.

I can only assume the constant controversy surrounding Brittany Murphy’s death coupled with his weight was more than Simon Monjack’s hearts could handle. Which is exactly what the penguins would want us to think…

Fat in Peace, You Fat Fuck.

UPDATE: And now it’s looking like an “accidental overdose.” If someone finds a turkey sandwich nearby, I’m going to be the next one to die from all the shock.

Photos: Splash News, WENN

  1. balls

    Hey WAHHhmbulance #100.

    It takes real balls to follow the Golden Rule (this has nothing to do with religion, I’m an atheist), no balls at all to hate, not give “a flying shit,” prejudge, express contempt and negativity, focus on superficial stuff like American Idol while your country bombs the hell out of people who had not one fucking thing to do with 9/11, etc.

  2. Fati87

    I don’t want to sound like all the whiners here, but it really isn’t a good idea to say things like this about a dead person. I get annoyed when people all of a sudden start talking about respect when some shitbag kicks in, but there you shouldn’t say things like “Fat in piece, fat fuck”. There is such a thing as karma and it’s a bitch.

  3. Fati87

    Geez.. Just read the comments. So many angry bitter people.. The venom is just pouring out, you don’t even have to try. I am not a self righteous person by far but some of you worry me.

  4. Gem

    Superficial Writer has always given respect to dead celebrities even if he’s previously ridiculed them – when i heard about Monjack’s death i have to admit i was curious to see what SW would do with this one…

  5. eeron

    This is probably the first time I bothered to read the comments in a Superficial post, and I must say that I’m impressed! So many so passionate about a guy they wouldn’t have spat on last week, but now he’s dead, he gets our respect? Come on.

  6. poundcake

    He had to have died from heart damage due to a history of heavy cocaine use. I imagine that Brittany went the same way. Both these two seem to have had weak genetics AND a stimulant addiction. That will kill you in about … NOW, if you were them.

    COCAINE – live fast, die young.

  7. wiight

    I am going to go with heavy cocaine use as the cause. Live fast and die young.

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  11. lolwut

    The Fish has done nothing short of being funny and honest. If you don’t want either of these, go read Celebuzz.

  12. A grown-up

    The question has been posed above – why should we respect the dead? (meaning, of course, those who’ve just died, not literally those who died centuries ago).

    The answer is quite simple, and immediate, to anyone with an ounce of emotional awareness, encapsulated in 9 easy to remember words (applicable in concept even for atheists) -

    There but for the grace of God go I.

    To respect another in such a moment, whoever they be, however they lived, is to respect one’s own mortality. If heaven exists, be assured Hell does not. There isn’t a crime on this planet that can cost one a punitive sentence of never seeing heaven again – this place & it’s goings on isn’t THAT important.

    If you have problems with someone, there’s plenty of time to air them at a later date after their demise. But hard on the heels of, that just betrays rank immaturity.

  13. cc

    Well, look on the bright side, when the mortician is done with him he will look better groomed than he ever did when he was alive.

    Fat, fucking slob…sat on his lard ass and ate mayonnaise out of the jar while his wife wasted away.

    Anyway, once the final news is in about how he died of an overdose we won’t hear anymore about him, amen.

  14. @84 “by your logic maybe someday there will be a law to get people to jail for calling someone FAT FUCK will it make sense?” Only if society finds it immoral, as you seem to do, then if wouldn’t be MY logic, but yours, as I stated that he is NOT breaking laws, and if you remember, the state is “Under Gawd”. Plus you focused on the wrong part of the comment, I requested a reason for your morality and to be persuaded, how am I going to convert now?.

  15. @84 “don’t say that the law is where morality resides” You are right, it resides within each of us, but it is diferent on all of us isn’t it? Does it really exist? “there are so many stupid laws only a few are necessary” Based on your sense of justice, not many things deserve punishment, does that mean you agree with me?. Would you consider a law abiding citizen a good person?.

  16. Matrim

    I never understood the whole “respect for the dead” thing. It was perfectly acceptable to make fun of this douche while he was alive, but now that he’s dead it’s suddenly taboo? Fuck that, the man is beyond caring what anyone says about him. He was an asshole in life, I’m not going to change my tune now that he’s dead.

  17. flavio

    fuck this fat fuck, i dont give a fuck.

  18. Weird. I guess that’s one way to rise above suspicion. Simon wins!

  19. @ 57, 105, 116 – That’s me. Even when a person dies, I don’t tend to like them any better. I probably don’t discuss them any more, though.

    Still, I often questioned if I had the wrong impression of Simon. Maybe he just had the misfortune of SEEMING rotten. He wasn’t very adept at managing his public image.

    @ 102 – “There is such a thing as karma…”
    What makes you think so?

  20. Wow such a bitch you are dead surface have some respect for this guy, well at least those who have criticized her, blamed her toward him and generally behaved appallingly after the death of his wife, now may hound him. RIP.

  21. @120. maybe I’m forgetting my english.

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