Simon Monjack Had Secret Love-Children

Apparently Simon Monjack had two secret love-children that not even his family or Brittany Murphy knew about. His mother and brother discovered e-mails on his laptop which they handed over to the police despite Brittany’s mom begging them not to. TMZ reports:

At some point they went through the computer and found emails from two women who wanted money from Simon for child support. According to people who have reviewed the emails, Simon had a son by one baby mama and a daughter by another.
Also in the computer … wire transfers of large amounts of money — as much as $48,000 in a single transfer. Simon was sending the money to lawyers, as well as someone in Europe for some sort of settlement.
We’re told Simon’s mom and brother felt the coroner should have the computer and handed it over. The coroner’s office is currently reviewing the contents.

Wait a minute. Do these kids have flippers? A hunger for fish? Uncanny tap-dancing abilities? It all makes sense now: Daddy Blubber breeds Happy Feet killers to make druggie wife’s mama go ga-ga for whale penis. If I’ve seen it once, I’ve seen it a thousand times…

Photo: WENN