Simon Cowell Knocked Up His Best Friend’s Wife

So Simon Cowell apparently knocked up Lauren Silverman the estranged, yet technically still married wife to Simon’s best friend Andrew Silverman. Because if there’s one thing the British love it’s the sweet tang of incest. “And rape!” says Jame Bond. “The sweet tang of rape. I say that in my first book. True story.” Us Weekly reports:

“She’s around 10 weeks along,” the insider shares. And that’s only part of the story.
Silverman, 36, is technically still married — to Cowell’s close friend Andrew Silverman, a real estate mogul in NYC. She plans to leave her estranged husband to be with the father of her child.
“Lauren and Andrew have been unhappy in their marriage for some time, and their divorce has been in the works for a while,” a source tells Us. “As their marriage deteriorated, she and Simon became close.”

Jesus. I don’t even know how I’d explain to my best friend that I put a baby in the vagina of a woman he hasn’t even divorced yet, but then again, I lack the means to fill a swimming pool full of cash and go, “So we good here?” Or do you save something like that for when there’s a body? This is why I don’t get invited to fancy dinners. There are so many rules.

Photos: INFdaily