Well, I Just Saw Shia LaBeouf Naked And Now I’m Putting That Evil On You

June 18th, 2012 // 90 Comments
Shia LaBeouf Naked Full Frontal Sigur Ros
WATCH: Shia LaBeouf in Sigur Rós 'Fjögur Píanó'
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Let me start out by saying I didn’t set out this morning with the intent to follow a post featuring Chris Hemsworth and Joe Manganiello shirtless with Shia LaBeouf‘s naked penis, but the Internet works in mysterious, wienery ways. So that said, above you’ll find The Beef starring buckass nude in the new video for Sigur Rós’ “Fjögur Píanó” which is eight minutes and 33 seconds of an afro-pubed Shia staring at butterflies whenever he’s not slapping on panty hose and doing interpretative dance. He also paints a boob at one point, but the whole thing’s so pretentiously arthouse it took me a minute to realize I wasn’t watching Jesus do pottery. Good luck getting through this thing.

superficial

  1. Jesus. I love Sigur Ros, but now…fuck.

  2. hattie

    what the fuck did i just watch? i am confused, repulsed and mesmerized. it’s as if lady gaga and wes anderson had a collaboration in my brain.

  3. cc

    Is he going to die for our sins? *crosses fingers*

  4. Dude of Dudes

    If Bumblebee doesnt kill him now I dont know what will make him. More panty hose?

  5. Dude of Dudes

    Bath salts my ass. Im pretty sure this is what that dude watched right before he went and ate that other dude’s face.

  6. Dick Hell

    Please fetch me a sanitary napkin, my eyeballs are bleeding.

  7. USDA Prime McBeef

    I made it 1 minute and 55 seconds. Anybody beat that high score?

  8. Cock Dr

    And when we do finally get some nudity it’s from some C list celebrity douchebag.
    Wiil never look at Shia LeDouche naked. Just like jumping off a cliff, you don’t have to do it to know it’s bad for you.
    i am little sympathy for those commenters moaning & groaning about their eyeball trauma…you were warned; why’d ya do it?

  9. GetOverYourself

    Girl knows how do do drag…needs to work on his tuck game, though.

  10. what the fuck just happened? what the hell did I just see?

  11. angie

    My eyes r bleeding!

  12. Claire

    why is he a hipster now?

  13. EricLr

    Throw in some gay cowboys eating pudding, some narration about the evils of war, and a “fin” at the end, and this would be up to the standards of a B+ film school short.

  14. This is probably the only time I’ve ever appreciated the firewall at work.

    • Fuck… I learned today that there’s no firewall for morbid curiosity. That said, did anyone else think the video was like an unfunny, Icelandic version of Groundhog Day?

  15. lolwut

    I’m pretty open minded. Granted, I’m no film student but I’ve seen some avant garde cinema in my day. I like to think that I can appreciate that which I don’t necessarily like but this…this is shit. I took away nothing from this.

  16. Jonesy

    Kids, this is what happens once you’ve been beaten by a fat, drunk Canadian. It fucks you up inside.

  17. imagen

    The fuck did I just watch??? 0.o

    BTW, I’m underwhelmed by his beef.

  18. vgrly

    I am not even going to click on the play option. yup. After posting thor, now this/

  19. Bonky

    Shia thinks he has transcended the medium of film. Let’s all laugh at Shia ! HA HA HA !!!

  20. MarkM

    Okay…I made it through one minute and twelve seconds…SURELY that’s a record of some sort!

  21. Chelsea

    Goddammit son. It’s bad enough that now I need to spend my afternoon sorting through just *why* I want to see Shia LeBeouf naked; if you’re gonna embed an 8+ minute piece of avant garbage on your page, you damn sure need to tell me the dick shots end in the first minute.

  22. PinkyPunk

    Selena Gomez is gonna be happy about this :D

  23. Turd Ferguson

    No fucking way I’m clicking play on this.
    I dont care much for the pretentious asshat with clothes *on*.

  24. thespiral

    I love dong more than anything, but this shit isn’t worth it.

    *depressed*

  25. jpbas

    I couldn’t make it to the end. I’m glad I don’t know the people behind it so I don’t have to lie to them that it’s good.

  26. tinagetsomeham

    At least the goods were in the beginning. I’m sure Megan Fox found their sexing to be mildly entertaining at best. I’m basing this solely on his interpretive dance skills.

  27. judging you

    I liked it… feel free to judge me, I deserve it. All I ask is that you are sane.

  28. Does skipping through it count as watching it? I kept clicking the bar to see if there was anything interesting past his dong… which wasn’t that interesting.

    Weirdly, he’s starting to look more and more like my ex-boyfriend. Not saying that’s a good thing, either…

  29. Lissa

    Some manscaping would be nice, unless it’s part of the insanity that is this so called “artistic expression”.

  30. Clara

    We just need a freeze frame of his dong. That is all I came here for.

  31. Micheal Bay’s direction of Transformers 4 is really different

  32. And, with that, the Indiana Jones franchise is officially dead.

  33. Cornbread

    Cosign Clara…I put myself through 3:09 of that stupid thing, and didn’t get a good wang shot. Fish, help a sister out? Thanks.

  34. jenna

    yup, nothing sexier than a guy with an insane nut fro that likes to dress up in a pink feather vest and black leggings!

  35. proud_bay_man

    The only thing this is missing is Russell Brand!

  36. Goddamn. Fuck this fucking hipster artsy whatever-the-fuck bullshit. I know everyone hates Juggalos, but wouldn’t you rather get smashed with a bunch of homies with a gives-no-fuck than hang out with anybody who thinks it’s a cool idea to make a music video featuring the kid from Even Stevens going insane over a lollipop while wearing a lace blindfold?

  37. Sarna

    Okay so, I actually watched the whole, entire, stupid thing. I have absolutely no idea what this is about or what it is supposed to represent. It was just.. stuff happening.

    The entire time I was only thinking of how much I don’t want to live on the same planet as this film anymore.

  38. tlmck

    Looks like LSD is making a comeback.

  39. celebutard

    More like La Beef Short Ribs.

  40. floyd

    Sigur Ros could only make so many albums before they had to go the “show actor wang” route. Their first couple albums we’re great, but how many albums of the same thing does the world need? Aside from that, Happy Birthday KimmyKim. You a single busty Korean?

  41. cece

    i think the meaning behind the video is about drugs and codependent and abusive relationships and how it becomes a cycle. i actually loved this.

  42. I watched the whole thing. It was pretty cool. It has a weird little story going on. I appreciate actors who are willing to go all the way for their art, instead of playing it safe and just raking in the money. Nudity is nothing to be afraid of.

  43. Harry the Turd

    I just threw up in my mouth a little, nah just kidding 8/10 would fap to again

  44. Well, I like Sigur Rós…can’t say as I’m a fan of the video, though.

  45. Kimberly

    Um. So if you think what you just saw was bad, try watching it all slow and choppy like I did.

    It went from two naked people staring at each other to Shia LaBeouf sloppily dipping the girl (that sounded wrong…) to a bunch of bulimic men in a car.

  46. MS

    It’s like if Jesus did coke and went to art school.

  47. harlee

    “right guys. so here’s my idea for this video. basically a cracked out cross-dressing jesus accidentally wanders into someone’s bad gay acid trip. plus, a shark. and maybe daryl hannah? i don’t even know. but, ooooh butterflies and shit. now where the fuck is my bong?”

  48. Rae!

    what. the actual FUCK.

  49. uhmm

    hhahahahahah…oh em gee wtf did i just watch. definitely on a good one for sure. someone give me the deets on what to do to be on that level!!

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