Interrupt The Beef’s Dinner And You Will Find Death Upon Your Door!

December 10th, 2013 // 17 Comments
Shia LaBeouf
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Shia LaBeouf has a history of threatening to murder people including those who help him escape a bar fight that wasn’t so much a fight as Shia repeatedly getting his face punched in by a shirtless giant. So here he is doing just that after a fan approached him at a London restaurant. Via The Daily Mail:

Dining at a chic restaurant bar in London’s Covent Garden, Shia was approached by a female fan who left in tears after having spoken to the star. The woman’s boyfriend is reported to have then approached the Transformers star which resulted in a ‘tussle’, according to The Sun of Sunday.
‘Shia pursued him and was overhead saying, “I can get you killed“,’ the paper reports.
The paper claims that Shia was eventually removed from the restaurant bar by a group of waiters and onlookers.

In The Beef’s defense, I couldn’t find any accounts of the woman puking in his presence, and to be fair, that’s kind of his thing now. It really “revs his engine,” I like to picture him saying, turgid with anticipation as a pool of vomit collects on the floor, glistening in the moonlight. Later, a butterfly will alight on his penis, and he’ll tell the young girl how his classmates used to call him “Wellington” until he made a Marilyn Manson video where this chick’s vagina has an eye it. “Shut them up good,” he’ll say before producing a Rolodex of hired killers while pointing towards his lover parts. Subtleties were his watercolors, and The Beef had a mind to paint…

Photo: Splash News

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  1. Drew

    I’ll give him one thing, at least he doesn’t deny that these things are happening like some of his contemporaries.

  2. Dox

    Yep. He gets a spot right next to Kanye and R Kelly in the concrete tomb bound for the marinas trench.

  3. Cock Dr

    There’s only one person I can think of that has earned the moniker “The Beef” & it’s not this shaved monkey boy.

  4. ace11

    IF this guy had sex with Megan Fox.. he is my hero

    • Mohawk Disco

      As long as you don’t tattoo his face and/or name anywhere on your body you’ll be fine.

    • cc

      I really hope it’s not true, because I don’t need confirmation that we live in an increasingly stupid, depressing world.

    • Sorry, I’m not buying it. She definitely fucked Michael Bay, as required obviously for a hot chick with little acting ability as he is the director, but she has no need to fuck this loser, he is not the director or the producers, he has little to no bearing on her employment.

  5. Mohawk Disco

    He’s quickly turning into a male version of Amanda Bynes.

  6. cc

    He looks so scary here, I feel like enrolling in MMA classes just IN CASE I run into him.

  7. ceo brat

    man I wish he would say that to me! it would be so funny! with my family being who they are he would not get the sentence fully out. LOL just kidding he would not make it past the body guards to tell me a thing. lol still, what a tool. People go to jail for doing this same thing.

  8. anonymous

    Doesn’t this clown get his ass kicked every year in some random brawl?

  9. asd

    wicked! go shia! lols

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