Sharon Stone should teach parenting classes

September 30th, 2008 // 49 Comments

Sharon Stone lost custody of her eight-year-old son last week with little explanation as to why – until now. Turns out Sharon Stone has the parenting know-how of a jelly donut. Here’s a snippet of the judge’s ruling via People:

Saying that Stone is “unable to provide the structure, continuity and reliability that Roan needs, and candidly, deserves,” the judge cited examples of Stone’s overreactions, including her incorrect belief her son was suffering a spinal illness and her suggestion of using Botox for foot odor.
According to the papers, “As Father appropriately noted, the simple and common sense approach of making sure Roan wore socks with his shoes and used foot deodorant corrected.”

Nice. Now, don’t get me wrong, Sharon Stone is clearly a goddamn nutbar, but explain to me how airing an eight-year-old boy’s foot odor problem in the media was a smart move. Poor Roan’s about to have an awesome day at school tomorrow: “Hey, Swamp Foot! Saw your mom’s beave on cable last night.” Yeah, that’s not gonna mess a kid up. Also, I can’t believe I forgot to DVR that shit. This is why I need TiVo.

Photo: WENN

  1. Barack Obama


  2. John McCain

    I like to fuck horses. Their bulky cocks tickle my prostate and stimulate blood flow to my prolapsed rectum.

  3. Anon

    She’s raised the bar, now lets see if Britney can raise it higher.

  4. WHAT?!?

    She wants to give an 8 year old kid Botox?

    Wow. Are they taking the other adopted boy away, too? He has no father to rescue him. Poor kid.

  5. Mdiz

    Old bag of bones!

  6. Shit

    Americans are fucking retards.

  7. Fuck

    John McCain shits in his backyard. Sarah Palin likes to nibble on his greasy haemorrhoids, God bless her.

  8. havoc

    In this case, its clearly the child’s fault….


  9. Michelle Obama

    My pussy smells like the monkey-house at the zoo.

  10. My pussy smells like your grandma’s house.

  11. Sarah Palin

    My pussy smells like the inside of a moose.

  12. Sarah Palin

    I make Goatse look like a virgin. Maybe I should downsize from moose cock to caribou cock. My pelvis can’t take much more of a beating.

  13. Sarah Palin

    My waterhead baby was born from my pulsating anus. Do you think this is normal?

  14. Michelle Obama

    I’ve never cheated on Barack, except with one of those handsome howler monkeys in the monkey-house at the zoo.

  15. Barack Obama

    Michelle, it’s OK . . . it was a threesome . . .

  16. Michelle Obama

    I think I’m pregnant.

  17. Barack Obama

    That’s not possible . . . I had a vasectomy . . .

  18. lol Shes a refine brit brit without the 5150′s…I think she means well in spite of all the goofs…besides, cut her a break she’s blonde…

  19. Michelle Obama

    I want to keep it.

  20. Anon


    Loving this political debate going on.

  21. Barack Obama

    OK, nobody will be able to tell the difference anyway . . .

  22. Michelle Obama

    Do you love me? Do you love our baby? I feel our baby inside me. I love this baby. Please, please love our baby . . . and love me too . . .

  23. Barack Obama

    I love our baby as if it were mine. I will never run out on you Michelle. I’m not like other black men.

  24. Michelle Obama

    Barack, after I have this baby . . . I’d like to have another . . . that handsome howler?

  25. Barack Obama

    Yes, Michelle. Consider it done.

  26. Michelle Obama

    Oh Barack! I love you! I love you so much! C’mere . . . you big handsome lug!!! Mmmmmuah!

  27. MaMa Mia

    She should buy leather shoes for her kids, and not those cheap Chinese plastic ones, with the lights and pictures of superheroes, everyone knows that they make little kids feet stinky. What an unfit Mother!

  28. americanmckrout

    #20- Why don’t you STFU? This is NO political debate- it is one person (probably you) commenting back and forth to himself, trying to be witty. PLEASE- unless Fish’s ‘story’ is politician-based, no one wants to read your un-funny political bullshit. For the love of God- this is Sharon Stone- there is so much better material here to work with! Like her turkey neck- her mom-hips (though she has never popped out any kids of her own)- her leathery skin… not to mention her fucked-up parenting. GET CREATIVE!

  29. John McCain

    I like to crash planes and graduate at the bottom of my class. I should be president because I was locked in a room for 5 years. During those 5 years I learned leadership skills and studied the nuances of the American economy.

  30. Zee Brat

    Gotta point out. Botox is used to stop underarm odor. So theoretically, it could work.

  31. americanmckrout

    My pussy smells like a political debate.

  32. Slut

    Tough call….Who should win the “Mother of the Year Award,” Lynn Spears or Sharon Stone?

  33. iwantsharon

    what is wrong with you people. take a look at the picture again. She is HOT. I mean she has got it back. What is she 28? Shes hotter now then when she was in Basic Instinct. Im dreaming of a threesome of her and me..and Kim Kardashian….look at that ass!!!!

  34. Anon

    was that necessary.
    Do you really think i’m as dense as you that i would think it’s a political debate?
    Whats wrong with you.
    I’m not the person doing it but I did find it amusing.
    Some of it a little vulgar but funny.

    Why don’t you take your own advice and STFU.

    Christ there’s always one.

  35. americanmckrout

    I have AIDS. I think I got it from sucking off that hobo in the park. I also have these mysterious brown growths on my abnormally large vagina. Any suggestions?

  36. Diana

    You guys are weird. (o:

  37. Uncle Eccoli


    You’re an idiot.

  38. Barack Obama

    @ #28, americanmckrout : Do you have something against black men serving as mentors and role models? Why can’t you follow my example, and be a faithful husband and provider?

  39. Michelle Obama

    That’s right honey! That #28 is a no account no good cheatin’ fool who runs around on his baby’s mama and then don’t support the chile.

    #28, shame on you! I love my Barack and my little baby. Now you just get out of here and leave decent black folk alone!

    You damn YT! You just think you know ever’thin’. Well, you don’t, so get lost!

  40. Michelle Obama

    One more thing . . .

  41. Michelle Obama

    . . . my pussy smells like the monkey-house at the zoo.

  42. sharon stone

    mine smells like that too…

  43. sameshitdifferentyear

    I almost don’t want to interfere with political figures making personal admissions on this thread, but I’ll go ahead anyway.

    What I was going to say, Sharon Stone and other stupid blondes in the media, are constantly portrayed as having a “high IQ”.
    What the fuck does that mean?
    First of all, I just recently took an IQ test, and I can state factually that it tests ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that tests “actual” “real” intelligence, which of course everyone knows means one or more of the following

    * Getting laid with people out of your league
    * Making money (eventually by doing absolutely nothing)
    * Starting your own homegrown cult (so other people do your dirty work for you)
    * Getting out of an intense conflict without it ever coming to blows

    So having a “high IQ” according to the standardized test, is about as useful as having “attractive pubic hair”
    (by the way I scored genius-level in the IQ test and I still have the utterly fucking useless shitty life that I do – proving my previous point entirely)

    Here are some blonde CUNTS who ARE NOT highly intelligent (or were not, in the case of the dead ones), no matter what their fucking IQ or whatever other measure of “intelligence” is, and no matter how good their fucking PR arms are in promoting them falsely

    - Marilyn Monroe (or whatever the fuck her real name was)
    - Paris Hilton (sure, she has a 120 IQ, if the “I” stands for “Idiot”)
    - Sharon Stone
    - Jessican Simpson (the tuna question wasn’t faked, she really is that fucking dumb)
    - Jane Mansfield

    and the list goes on and on

    Contrast that with

    - Madame Curie
    - Eleanor Roosevelt
    - Apollonia (no not the unbelievably hot-and-stupid Prince chick)
    - Madeleine Albright (i’m talking intelligent here – good vs evil is something else……………)
    - Ayn Rand

    and that list goes on and on

    Anyway, Michelle Obama can go back to talking about what she supposedly smells like, now that I’ve said what I wanted to.

  44. sharon stone

    i thought IQ was the amount of “junk” comes out your vagina when you go to the doctor. That is why i was told i had a high IQ.

  45. It’s never too late to learn, folks!!

  46. Geezus! Look at the size of Stone’s hips the picture above! She’s fat! She’s huge! She’s an ugly, wrinkled, old hag!And to top it all off, she is a horrible mother! I said this last time, but nooooo, some had to give her the benefit of the doubt, didn’t they?!

    Now poor little Roan, (aka little stinky swamp feet), is going to have to stay with his creepy mustachioed dad with the lizard bite on his toe. That cannot be good for Roan’s smelly, stinky, swampy little feet.

  47. malicious

    go the Fish! saw your mum’s beave – what a crack up!!

  48. Doubs

    Botox can be used to treat excessive sweating… thus she could be right in her foot odor solution.

  49. So there, you stupid goyim cattle

    You stupid goyim, blonds are all idiots, every one. They all need to be put to death.

    Now, you stupid mindless white goyim, I hope you’ve learned your lesson and are ready to worship jews as the noahide laws say you should, you blithering idiots.

    We’ve spent billions in Hollywood to get you saps to the point where you will accept directions by “wise disinterested blacks who have nothing but your best interests at heart” (hahahahahahaha!!!), and at long last you’re doing it.

    And by the way, we own McCain too.

    Get back to your talmud-visions, you stupid white sheeple.

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