Shaquille O’Neal arrests perverts
Remember when Shaquille O’Neal announced he wanted to be a U.S. marshal? Turns out he was serious. The 7 foot giant has reportedly helped make 30 busts against child pornography offenders, saying:
“I do not have to run after the people or tackle them. They always surrender peacefully,” Shaq recently told Webster Hall’s Baird Jones. “And I’m never afraid. When I arrive, they are really already under arrest.” Shaq says he’s not in it for the glory. “I am not a hero . . . My father was my hero growing up. He was an Army drill sergeant and an FBI agent.”
I look forward to the day one of the silly perverts decides to run from the cops only to have Shaquille O’Neal swoop in and bite him in half. Because that’s what giant people do. They bite other smaller people in half. It’s like their trademark.