The Rest of The 2013 Billboard Music Awards

May 20th, 2013 // 97 Comments

Here’s the rest of The 2013 Billboards Music Awards which you’ll probably notice is nothing but Jennifer Lopez, Selena Gomez, Jenny McCarthy‘s breasts and Madonna‘s unholy war on pants. On that note, if you’re wondering why there are way more performance shots of Jennifer Lopez than Selena Gomez, that’s because Selena didn’t jump around the stage looking like Roja, Big Bird’s Latina cousin with the big ass.

Photos: Getty

superficial

  1. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    meeps!
    Commented on this photo:

    So Big Bird and Elmo finally knocked boots…

  2. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    If given the choice between seeing the legs or seeing the arms….she made the right choice.

  3. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    henry hill
    Commented on this photo:

    love the fashionable third arm. always a trendsetter.

  4. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Fredical
    Commented on this photo:

    Performing as a flying monkey in the Latin musical version of The Wizard of Oz, “El Wiz”

  5. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m guessing Stratos is her stylist’s favorite Master of the Universe. Ram Man is her boyfriend’s.

  6. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    These gay background dancers aren’t helping her boyfriend’s case.

  7. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    I zoomed in on the note she’s holding. It says:
    1. Stop dressing like you’re trying to turn on a businessman from the 60s.
    2. Don’t put on too much make-up. It’s OK to show your age sometimes.
    3. Put on some pants.
    4. Seriously, put some fucking pants on. Leave the stage now and find some.
    5. Don’t try to kiss Taylor Swift. She’s not into you (or anyone).
    Unfortunately, she forgot her glasses and the advice went ignored.

  8. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m just a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual Transylvania.

  9. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “You were supposed to stop them from taking pictures of my ass!”
    “I’m sorry ma’am. I mean mom. I mean boss. I mean honey.”

  10. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Birds of War!!! Raaaaaaaw.

  11. Jenny McCarthy Breasts Billboard Music Awards
    guest
    Commented on this photo:

    I think you’ve got Madonna and Jenny McCartney’s captions mixed up.

  12. Selena Gomez Billboard Music Awards
    diego
    Commented on this photo:

    Let me get this straight: Selena Gomez + Sex with Bieber = Khloe Kardashian? WTF?

  13. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    bewblover
    Commented on this photo:

    Thats a thick bitch…

  14. Selena Gomez Billboard Music Awards
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    In headset: “Hello? Helloo? What rat trap India call center have I been routed to this time . . . Wait, are you singing something? . . . Goddamnit, I just want to add a new printer to my Dell!”

  15. Selena Gomez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who needs the Latino culture when you can just steal someone else’s then sexualize it? Now, who wants to see me jack-off an elephant?”

  16. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Where da gay boyfriends at?”

  17. Jenny McCarthy Breasts Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Baby killer!

  18. Jenny McCarthy Breasts Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Get your boners ready, tweens! Your queen has arrived! *looks at Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez* Amateurs!”

  19. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Tiggles
    Commented on this photo:

    “No, no, Casper, no juice and cookies until after the awards show! Then you can have nap time too.”

  20. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Which one of you motherfuckers has my red ball? Give it up!”

  21. Selena Gomez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She will have to hit 40 before she starts looking like an actual adult!

  22. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Fly, my pretties! Fly!”

  23. Jenny McCarthy Breasts Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is that your baby? How cute, can I hold him?”
    “No.”

  24. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like Streisand

  25. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Grampa got like this towards the end too.

  26. Cock Dr

    Does the above photo have anything to do with this “Angry Birds” thing I keep hearing about?

  27. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Long thought extinct, the Puerto Rican Giant Bloody Parrot was hunted not for its red feathers, but in retribution for kidnapping young men, and for keeping the villagers awake with its ghastly squawking.

  28. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    Here’s a picture of the background dances moments before their tribute to Farrah Abraham.

  29. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Would you PLEASE just leave me out of your ridiculous fucking award shows?” – Jesus

  30. Jenny McCarthy Breasts Billboard Music Awards
    CptCreep
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like someone has been putting out cigarettes in her armpit…

  31. Selena Gomez Billboard Music Awards
    Krazee Thug Nutz
    Commented on this photo:

    If she gains any weight, that face is going to ballon into disfigurement.

  32. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m pretty sure Kevin Clash designed the sexy Elmo costume for JLo’s boyfriend to wear not her.

  33. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Madonna, in a carefully rehearsed speech, explains that she “No hurt Gelfling”, and that “Skeksis want peace”

  34. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    O_0 …. thanks?

  35. Jenny McCarthy Breasts Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t speak for everyone, but to me, nothing says “expert in medical sciences” quite like a great set of jugs.

  36. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Is there anything Simon Pegg can’t do?

  37. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    MeanMrsMustard
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone let her out of the retirement home dressed like that?

  38. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    MeanMrsMustard
    Commented on this photo:

    Wearing fishnet wrapped around that area of your body isn’t sending the right subliminal message.

  39. Selena Gomez Billboard Music Awards
    MeanMrsMustard
    Commented on this photo:

    It;s like she skinned a Trapper Keeper to make her dress.

  40. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    MeanMrsMustard
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor guy. If he stops dancing, the Red Bird of Death is going to eat him.

  41. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Hands up if you wanna hear “Freebird”

  42. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s just spotted a rabbit. One swoop and it will be hers.

  43. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    As to what the picture represents, that depends upon who looks at it.

    J Whistler (famous artist)

  44. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Please tell us she’s not in Anchorman 2.

  45. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like she’s getting thicker with every picture.

  46. Jennifer Lopez Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    This is that meta moment where the performer makes the same face as the entire crowd.

  47. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    What an odd brand of adult diapers she’s endorsing!

  48. Madonna The 2013 Billboard Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    There simply is no explanation…

Leave A Comment