Sean Kingston Crashed Into This

May 31st, 2011 // 33 Comments

For those of you blissfully detached from the Internet all weekend, hip hop/R&B singer Kisean Anderson, a.k.a. Sean Kingston, was practically, and possibly was (It’s that bad), killed on Sunday after crashing his jet ski into a bridge in Miami. He also had a female passenger with him who somehow survived unharmed, but obviously didn’t have sex with him afterward officially making this the worst jet ski ride of Sean Kingston’s life. TMZ reports:

Alcohol was NOT a factor in the jet ski accident that left Sean Kingston in critical condition … this according to a report released by the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.
The report describes the accident by saying, “Anderson was operating a PWC [personal watercraft] with a female passenger westbound along McArthur Cswy towards the Palm Ave bridge. Anderson struck the bridge and was transported to Ryder Trauma Center in critical condition.”

I think my favorite part of this story, and I should be allowed to have one, is the police driving boats out to the bridge Sean Kingston crashed into as if they’re just going to take it downtown and start questioning it. “Alright, ese, you gonna tell me why you got beef with Sean Kingston, or we gonna do things… *grabs bridge by the abutment* ‘my way.’ One week ’til retirement, homes, but don’t think some measly pension is gonna stop me from bustin’ you in the cabeza. ‘Beautiful Girls’ was my song, ese! It touched me. Touch me right here. *taps heart* So, now? Now, we get loco…”

Photos: Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Bridge? What bridge?
    I ain’t seein’ no damn bridge!

  2. Somebody call 9-1-1…sombody’s fire burning on the causeway, ohooooho….

  3. Snooki's Taint

    You know, I wasn’t ” blissfully detached from the Internet all weekend” and I still hadn’t heard anything about this. Maybe because ‘celebrity’ gossip sites aren’t the only thing I visit, and I didn’t see anything on my bookmarked animal porn sites and friend’s cat’s pictures photogalleries mentioning this. Bastards!

  4. Kevin

    I wish Alcohol was a factor because then he would have an excuse…as it stands, he ran into a bridge…sober…

  5. Michelle

    Was he just mesmerized by the giant phallic symbols protruding from the water that he missed the fact that it was a FUCKIN BRIDGE.

  6. Not surprising

    Worst Drivers in order(with the females of the species being first of course):

    Koreans
    Chinese/Vietnamese tied for 2nd
    Blacks
    Latinos
    Old White People(blue hairs)
    White Trash/Drunks
    Whites

    Am I a racist? Oh who cares.

  7. Beavis

    Heh-heh, Fish said a-butt-ment!

  8. the captain

    ……..driving ON a bridge goes better for sure!!

  9. Annie

    So basically he was totally incompetent at driving watercraft. Way to go!

  10. Racist Isaac Newton

    A fat black man in motion will remain in motion until he crashed his fat black ass into a bridge.

  11. It had to be said

    Well, in fairness, it is hard to see that huge white bridge against a blue sea and a blue sky. It kind of blends . . . moron.

  12. misterfister

    How can you not see that?? Really? Was he driving with one hand and fisting her with the other?

  13. I know what happened

    His big black erect penis hit the bottom of the bridge, they are charging his bitch with manslaughter because he she jerked him off just prior to entry(under the bridge that is).

    You see, there’ s a logical explanation for everything.

  14. More importantly, is the bridge ok?

  15. I didn’t know it was possible to operate a jetski without being intoxicated. I mean, well I know it’s POSSIBLE, but there just doesn’t seem to be any REASON to.

    That being said, some guy I never heard of who uses a stage name I never heard of crashed a fucking jetski into a bridge while sober…damn, the day after a holiday is always slow for news.

  16. Cop on the scene: Mr. Kingston was severely injured, but his passenger was fine…

    Caruso: Well, it looks like…

    Caruso: He went a bridge too far.

    YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!

  17. DC_Diva

    It is very tasteless and classless to make jokes about somebody nearly dying.
    Especially really corny whack azz jokes. Get better Kingston. Thoughts and prayers are with you.

  18. andi72

    pray for sean kingston… to stop making music

  19. Hate Crime

    Black man + Water… it just couldn’t end well.

  20. HowardMoon

    It’s the bridges,.. they hate the Hip-Hop.
    God I love bridges.

  21. Sean Kingston Jet Ski Crash
    waid henry
    Commented on this photo:

    hey sean i hope that you will get well soon. i am happy that it was’nt worst thank god you are still alive i am proud of you.

  22. Cops: Mr Anderson, are you injured?
    Anderson: No, I think I’m ok.
    Cops: (sighs) So we gotta do THAT too?

  23. robin

    Hey I just wanna say hw did he hite that brige I jus thank god that he made it he was blessed n god was with him da brige ain’t get no scrake on it

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