Scott Disick Bought His Kid a Motorcycle for Christmas WTF

Somewhere between getting drunk by a pool with a 19-year-old in a foreign country and waking up next to a pool the next day next to an empty bottle of vodka and a 19-year-old in a foreign country, Scott Disick finds time to be a dad. Paps caught Lord Disickhead taking his 8-year-old son Mason to a motorcycle shop to stock him up on everything he needs to be a neighborhood nuisance. Why the hell photographers were hanging out at a motorcycle shop is pretty ridiculous, so I’m pretty positive Disick paid them to take pictures of him being “the cool dad.” Maybe Kris even wrote this subplot, I wouldn’t put it past her.

When I was a kid, the “cool dad” I knew was my buddy Tommy’s. His dad gave him a stack of Penthouse magazines for Christmas when he turned 11. Tommy’s dad was a lot like Scott Disick too, in that he never saw Tommy except around holidays and his birthday and aways smelled like cigarettes and cheap booze. Tommy’s dad would be just like Scott Disick, except for the fact that Scott Disick magically has tons of money from doing nothing and Tommy’s dad never had any money because he bet on horses for a living.

Before you flip shit over the whole “giving an 8-year-old a motorcycle” thing, it’s actually pretty common for kids to get into riding early on. However, these kids usually live in rural places where they also learn to shoot guns at age six and not Calabasas, California. Where the hell is this kid going to do with that thing, hop the 101 to the 405 for a day in Santa Monica?

I’m going to predict that this bike will be taking up space as a laundry rack in a cluttered garage by Easter.

Yours with savage pettiness,
A guy who never got a motorbike for Christmas.

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