Scary Spice wears a bikini, I now know fear

March 14th, 2008 // 239 Comments

These are shots of Melanie Brown vacationing in Miami with her husband Stephen Belafonte. You may know her as “Scary Spice” of the Spice Girls. However, after seeing these, I’m now changing her name to “Holy crap, hide your penis! Unless you’re really really drunk then okay, maybe, sure I’d understand if you’d want to throw it in there because, yeah, alright, she’s not that bad but only from certain angles – sort of Spice.” Girl power!

Photos: INFdaily.com

  1. mmmmm…the latents like!

  2. Ed

    So THAT’S who uses the patio furniture before it goes to Goodwill.

  3. Randal

    Regardless of how she looks, it’s what’s on the inside that matter and she’s a good person from what I’ve seen over the years. She’s also a work horse when it comes to the concerts she’s been part of and the Spice Girls are one of my favorite shows that I’ve seen over the years.

    Congrats to her and her family for a job well done!

  4. Tony

    It requires little imagination to envision feces coming out of that ass.

  5. JM

    Dammit, it looks like Aughra finally got her hands on the Dark Crystal. The gelflings are totally fucked now. Where the hell are Jen and Kira when you need them?

  6. Barack

    Nothing screams class like a black chick showing off her nasty-tats stank ass body…”Haaaaaaayyyy baaaaybeeee!”

  7. Sambo the Ass Pirate

    @3 she does have a strong resemblance to a clydesdale.

  8. White Girl in Background

    “There goes the neighborhood…”

  9. Is this why Eddie left?!

  10. Sam

    I don’t know, she looks ok for her age and having kids. Plus, she might be able to make her boyfriend a nice wallet using those flaps under her buttcheeks.

  11. Jungle Wungle

    If she smokes, she pokes.

  12. THESUPERFICIALCREATOR ISLAME

    Seriously the guy that makes this site is a homo, this chick is banging and any guy that says wants to say she is nasty would do her in a heart beat

  13. That’s a brave man sitting there. She’s in the sun, sweating, and look how she’s lifting her leg and where he’s sitting, and how he’s still upright. A weaker man would have instantly fainted and lost all bladder and bowel control, like Frist’s last date, prompting her daughter to look in the bedroom and say, “Again?”

  14. G. Ferraro

    #13 – black guy – who’d you steal the computer from?

  15. @14 Nice to see you finally got the right link troll.. Thanks for filling in for me..

  16. dave

    I’d hit that.

  17. The Troll of Ript

    Listen Bunsmiths, Ript didn’t write that shit. Some maniacal fucking asshole with a pathological desire to rule a giant ant farm – the world’s largest – growing out of his anus – did.
    A strong but unloved baby, it survived by feeding off the hatred of his parents and the insects that swarmed his filthy hole in the floor where he was left to dwell. It grew, this sexually ambiguous young Trolling, having stored the manifest energies of perversion and discord from his family’s disgust towards his pathetic existence. It grew and grew and did not stop growing. Greedily, it hobbled unnoticed amidst the environs of men, absorbing every profanity and disfiguration selfishly calling deformity and disease his art. Despising procreation for wasted energy, he devoured his own genitalia.
    And then when he learned nothing and saw only shadows, he sequestered himself back in his hole and became…the worst Asshole on the Cyberplane…the Troll of Ript.
    Like an eternal maggot that has eaten his host to dust, the repulsive worm (I) vanishes in the indignities of his own sorrow, shame, and ignorance. But lies in stasis…awaiting new flesh to devour…pungence…

  18. THESUPERFICIALCREATOR ISLAME

    @15 wHaT fOoL i’S gOnNa KiCk Yo aZz

  19. aja

    What’s wrong with the way she looks?

  20. deacon jones

    GOD, I can just smell her ashy, flabby ass crack from here. Eddie Murphy’s a fucking nut

  21. REYES

    What is wrong with you people? I’m a chick, and I’m telling u right now that girl’s body is smoking! And she got 2 kids!! I mean what is wrong with you, are you all smoking crack?

    AND TO G. FERRARO I HOPE YOU DIE A PAINFUL DEATH YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT! YOU ARE TAKING UP OXYGEN THAT SHOULD GO TO SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY HAS A BRAIN YOU FUCKING MORON.

  22. Sambo the Ass Pirate

    @18 is this your favorite paragraph from a Nora Roberts novel? stuff it already.

  23. THESUPERFICIALCREATOR ISLAME

    @20 exactly! the dude who wrote this article was trying wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to hard to be funny; she isn’t bad at all, but one thing is obvious, the person who wrote this doesn’t like women, he thinks they are icky and have cooties

  24. @21 Deacon, did you party with her and Eddie too?

  25. Auntie Kryst

    Her husband’s last name is Belafonte? What I want. What I really really want is to know if he’s Harry Belafonte’s son.

    Whoa that joke sucked. Ah well, it’s almost happy hour. Drink up fuckers.

  26. G. Ferraro

    Hey, tard twins! Yes, you two, “THESUPERFICIALCREATOR ISLAME” (English, motherfucker! Do-you-speak-it?) and “aja” – she’s not disgusting because of her body. She’s disgusting because she’s black and nearly naked. It offends more evolved sensibilities.

  27. Um...

    I was going to hate on the writer for saying Mel B looks bad — but then I remembered that this is the same guy who has described Britney as doable TWICE this week. So either his penis is confused, or he just preferes his ladies a little paler, chubbier, and batshit crazier.

  28. This chick just oozes class!

    And, you know if Eddie Murphey hit it – she must have a penis.

  29. havoc

    Christ, she makes Queen Latifah look feminine……

    .

  30. REYES

    G. FERRARO…IF YOU ARE MAN ENOUGH TELL ME WHERE U LIVE SO THAT I CAN COME FUCK YOUR ASS UP.

    BUT I KNOW YOUR SKINNY WHITE ASS DON’T HAVE THE NERVE THAT IS WHY U HIDE BEHIND YOUR COMPUTER ALL DAY LIKE THE LOSER THAT YOU ARE.

    I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YOUR ASS FACE TO FACE & DO DAMAGE.

    WHAT HAPPENED TO MAKE YOU SO ANGRY? OH, I KNOW. YOUR FAT CUNT OF A MOTHER PROBABLY LEFT YOUR WHITE TRASH POPS FOR SOME BLACK DICK RIGHT?

  31. deacon jones

    @25
    No! What do you think I am, a tranny hooker or something, oh wait a second..

  32. Marsellus Wallace

    That’s one hard, pipe-hittin’ nigga.

  33. G. Ferraro

    #31 – google “caps lock”

  34. jerkface

    I don’t get it. She looks alright to me. What do I know, though? I’m dating a piece of carpet remnant. I’m gonna have to get those goo stains out soon.

  35. I thought this chick is the Nauthy Proffesor himself pretending to be Melanie Brown.

  36. REYES

    G. FERRARO…

    SERIOUSLY??? THAT IS ALL YOU CAN COME UP WITH? LMFAO!!!

    LIKE I ALREADY KNEW YOU A PUSSY!! WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED.
    GO BACK TO GOTTI WORLD YOU FUCKING ITALIAN SCUMBAG.

  37. dude

    OH My gosh You guys are on your game today. I’ve been on this site for two years and these posts are some of the best I’ve ever read!! G Ferraro, deacon Jones, Ed, tony, #2 #6, #13, #14 but especially #15…Damn, I’m still laughing.

    Shit, that is funny.

    Only a spiritual and emotional derelict would find this bitch attractive.

  38. Site Amdministrator

    #31 and #37…Uh, your ignorance is showing.

    Ummm…I love Mexicans. they’re hot women. I married one. But you are a beaner. And in the words of Chris Rock, everybody hates a beaner.

    And if you find time to put down the crack pipe, take your caps lock off.

  39. bmose

    Covered in tats and smoking Newports. She might be ghetto fabulous, but EEEWWWWW!

  40. deacon jones

    @38
    HA! Thanks Dude, someone who appreciates talent!

    Now Im going to go drink myself silly at happy hour and cry myself to sleep

  41. REYES

    ACTUALLY ASSHOLE I AM NOT A MEXICAN, BUT THANKS FOR CARING.

    AND, THE INVITATION EXTENDS TO YOU TOO ASSHOLE. YOU ARE THE IGNORANT ONE; TELL ME WHERE YOU LIVE & I WILL SHOW YOU JUST HOW IGNORANT YOU REALLY ARE.

  42. Momo

    I’m a little confused….I’m a chick so maybe I don’t get what men are looking for but I think she looks nice. Especially for an older woman who has given birth.

  43. ch474

    The tats I can live with, and considering she’ s still working off baby fat, I would have to say I’d hit that and hit that HARD. Drop the smokes and brush your teeth first though would ya hon? There are few things in this world as sexy as a black woman with boobs in a white bikini.

  44. @37
    Not fer nuttin’ but Gotti towns kicks muthafuckin’ ass. All these fake orangey skin little people with spikey hair singing It’s a Small Camero after all is really cute. He’s me and my bros heading to Gotti land. We’re gonna drink some Heinekens and jagerbombs.

  45. sean

    I’m sorry, did you say Scary Spice or Jerry Rice?

  46. ixx

    nice ass!

  47. Jesse

    Thank god Fish posted a new story, about a white chick. It would have SUCKED to go through the weekend with the picture of this feces-flinging monkey on top.

  48. Jen

    Hey Superficial guy, what do you have against black girls?

    Mel B looks FINE, and so does Brooke Hogan, so stop saying pretty girls look like men!

  49. REYES

    HONESTLY YOU FUCKING RACIST ASSHOLES ARE SICKENING.

    LEAVE THE FUCKING COUNTRY NOW CAUSE WE ABOUT TO HAVE A BLACK PRESIDENT & YOU ARE GONNA BE SCREWED.

    GO STICK YOUR INFECTED DICK IN PARIS HILTON’S INFECTED PUSSY, YA’LL NASTY ASS MUTHAFUCKERS DESERVE EACH OTHER…

    NASTY WHITE MEN & SKANKY WHITE CHICKS WITH NO TITS OR ASS GO TOGETHER WELL.

    THAT WAY YOUR HOMO ASS CAN CLOSE YOUR EYES & PRETEND IT’S REALLY A MAN YOU FUCKING, WHICH I KNOW IS WHAT YOU REALLY LIKE.

  50. Sean

    Good news: If she smokes, she pokes.

    Bad news: If she smokes, she’s unkissable.

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