Melanie Brown gave birth to a baby girl early this morning, though no name has been picked out yet and she’s just being referred to as Baby Brown. And because Scary Spice is a slut, she’s still not sure who the father is. She claims Eddie Murphy is the father, but Murphy said on a Dutch TV show last December:
“I don’t know whose child that is until it comes out and has a blood test. You shouldn’t jump to conclusions, sir.”
If I was Eddie I’d be denying I was the father too, just so nobody thought I ever had sex with Scary Spice. It’d be like getting caught having sex with a moose. Or admit to masturbating to Sesame Street.
Fifth Stooge | April 3, 2007 at 7:09 am
A baby girl what?
freak_show | April 3, 2007 at 7:10 am
Monkey. A baby girl monkey.
Adult Underoos | April 3, 2007 at 7:14 am
i thought eddie could only get hard for trannies.
teetee | April 3, 2007 at 7:15 am
third
HerpesHilton | April 3, 2007 at 7:15 am
Ah…a baby who can’t sing and has a penchant for trannies…
F-Sucker | April 3, 2007 at 7:24 am
I’ll bet she gave birth to an alien.
Maybe Anna Nicole Smith was the father.
tits_on_snack | April 3, 2007 at 7:28 am
I bet it was the popup ad that keeps flying up into my face as I’m trying to read this, and hovering over the entire paragraph, forcing me to click “close” on it, only to have it fly up into my face again. I bet it was the father.
vanman | April 3, 2007 at 7:29 am
Wait, masturbating to Sesame Street is wrong? When the hell was someone gonna tell me? Jerks.
Binky | April 3, 2007 at 7:30 am
This story’s a little Scary
TurboT | April 3, 2007 at 7:38 am
At least she can deduct the Baby as a dependent.
YouRang | April 3, 2007 at 7:42 am
There’s nothing wrong with masturbating to Sesame Street. Big Bird has a sexy ass. And who hasn’t thought of wild monkey love sessions with Bert & Ernie? The Fish is just being a prude.
Superevil | April 3, 2007 at 7:43 am
Pretty soon it’ll be ready to join the other 3 horsemen.
mztry | April 3, 2007 at 7:48 am
ALL your mothers called to say they are having retro-active abortions on you ASSHOLES!
THIS WOMAN KNOWS who the father of her baby is JERKS!
Jason The Barbarian | April 3, 2007 at 7:48 am
Will they check for donkey DNA?
Jimbo | April 3, 2007 at 7:53 am
Eddie has a think for trannie hookers!! I wonder if the baby is going to breath fire and have wings?
sympathee | April 3, 2007 at 8:20 am
was the baby…. human!?@$
thebor | April 3, 2007 at 8:34 am
Oh Snuffy your trunk is so big!
Superevil | April 3, 2007 at 8:55 am
13, I really wish you would kill yourself.
lambman | April 3, 2007 at 8:58 am
Well, at least we know she’s a woman.
How classless is Eddie? He dated the girl for a few months, she’s knocked up who’s kid does he think it is? I can’t wait for these DNA results.
BarbadoSlim | April 3, 2007 at 9:00 am
So, it came out of her fat ass when she took a shit this morning, right?
leewame | April 3, 2007 at 9:23 am
Obviously the father is Bert and Ernie, since they have wild monkey sex, and Scary has given birth to a baby monkey. Duh.
Lowlands | April 3, 2007 at 9:39 am
Well,when it turns out that Eddie Murphie really doesn’t want to play father and mother with her anymore.She doesn’t have to despair,i’m sure there’ll be a plantation owner who’s willingly to take her and a baby to let them work on his cottonfields.
Lowlands | April 3, 2007 at 9:41 am
#22)The baby…
Jillia | April 3, 2007 at 9:51 am
#3 Take another look at her face and think about what you just said… : P
UNWASHEDMASSES | April 3, 2007 at 10:08 am
At this point in her career, the manager of the local Walmart might be swabbed.
DrunkBlogger | April 3, 2007 at 10:40 am
That’s usually how it works.
Fifth Stooge | April 3, 2007 at 10:49 am
22 Lowlands- You’re doing good here. Don’t blow it by going all racists on us.
woodhorse | April 3, 2007 at 11:00 am
#13: before you go get all righteous, look at that statement in quotes and think for a minute. Doesn’t that sound supiciously like Dr. Phowstus? Why is he so quiet all of a sudden? Methinks he doth not protest enough.
Carsten5577 | April 3, 2007 at 11:48 am
Is that the has-been lardass who got pregnant on purpose by Murphy? Good career move. Now she won’t have to worry about money again. She could join the club. Women can be such classy, principled creatures.
ImmaKnock'ErTeethOut | April 3, 2007 at 11:58 am
#28
hmmm…do you mean Dr. Faustus?
Stop frontin’. If you’re trying to be smart, at least get it right.
Dr. Faustus, by Marlowe. That Does Not have anything to do with Shakespeare.
Hamlet — “The lady doth protest too much…” Act 3, Scene 2
Read, dumbass!
Lowlands | April 3, 2007 at 11:59 am
It ain’t bad nowadays working on cottonfields.It’s from 9 to 5 and you’re getting 3 breaks.Great salary,vacations and a 13e month salary pay.
Fifth Stooge | April 3, 2007 at 2:28 pm
#31 Lowlands- You are tripping me the fuck out. I laugh everytime I read your comments.
What the hell is a 13e month salary pay?
TrimSpaBaby | April 3, 2007 at 2:53 pm
#30 He’s referring to Dr. Phowstus who posts on here – maybe you should read a little, dumbass, and you’ll get it right.
TrimSpaBaby | April 3, 2007 at 2:57 pm
#28 Woodhorse, it’s way too late for mztry to START getting righteous – if there’s a celeb out there who doesn’t have her idiot head halfway up their ass, I’d be surprised. They’re each and every one living saints walking among us, didn’t you know?
Lowlands | April 3, 2007 at 3:11 pm
#32)I remember i asked my former employer the same thing when we reached the 13e month.After that i had to give first aid to my bankaccount.
N@ughty | April 3, 2007 at 5:57 pm
you know what? i actually DID show this picture to my three year old and told her that this was what came into her room at night when she was a bad little girl…let’s just say she’s a good little girl now.
oh yea congratulations to scary spice on her little pooch…literally…a dog
Ted...From LA | April 3, 2007 at 8:19 pm
I was on a bus when this woman got out of the hospital. She boarded the bus and the driver said, “Lady, you’re ugly, but that is the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.” She was very angry and walked to the back of the bus fuming. When she sat down she told the man next to her that the bus driver just called her ugly. He said, “Well you just go up there and tell him to go to hell. I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
WTFiswrongwithUppl | April 3, 2007 at 8:47 pm
LMFAO #17 you sick fuck! I spit water on my screen
freak_show | April 4, 2007 at 12:57 pm
37 Ted, I already said that baby was a monkey. Don’t repeat my schtick.