Scarlett Johansson says no to bras

I could sit here for hours, listing off the reasons why Scarlett Johansson puts every other woman to shame, but I think this quote from Michael Bay pretty much sums it up.

Bay said he was prepared for the usual actress nerves when it came to shooting a love scene between the two leads. “We’re ready to go and of course the actress is not there,” he told reporters. He said he was summoned to Johansson’s trailer, expecting to have to reassure the star of “Lost in Translation” that her privacy and dignity would be protected.

“She’s standing there and she says, ‘I’m not wearing this cheap … bra. I’m going naked,’ ” Bay said. “I said, ‘It’s PG-13, you have to wear the bra.’” [via CNN]

In case Scarlett happens to be reading this, I’d like to let her know that I’ll be directing the NC-17 version of The Island and she’s already been cast. The script is pretty much just five hours of having sex with the director, but I think it has a real shot at some Oscars. And unlike that fruit-loop of a man Michael Bay, I sure as crap won’t be telling her to keep any bras on. Even if I was making a PG-13 movie, I’d be sure to get as much crazy naked sex on film as I could, and then keep it in storage for a special director’s cut or something. And by ‘director’s cut’ I mean my own personal collection of pornography I keep hidden in my closet behind that 2nd place 2005 Hot Dog Eating trophy. Damn you Kobayashi, my day will come!