Scarlett Johansson & Ryan Reynolds wed

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds quietly wed this weekend in Canada, People reports:

Attended by only a handful of close friends and family, the ceremony was held at a remote wilderness retreat outside of Vancouver, B.C.
This is the first marriage for both. The couple had announced their engagement in May.

Ryan Reynolds can marry Scarlett Johansson wherever the hell he wants. I’m still going to try and squeeze her breasts through my monitor. I’m a man of princi- “SMASH!” …. Heh. *picks up phone* Hello, Tech Support. Yeah, another one. Uh huh. Last time, seriously. I promise. Uh huh. Fifteen minutes? Fantastic.

UPDATE: “SMASH!” Honest to God, I swear I felt a nipple that time.

Photos: Splash News