Scarlett Johansson at Match Point premiere

By: Superficial / December 9, 2005

sjohansson_matchpoint.jpgEven if she does expect cars and unicorns for Christmas, the fact that Scarlett Johansson can squeeze into a tight dress and has no problem pushing her breasts up for the world to see make her okay in my book. There aren’t many modern women around that are still willing to pander to the male species by getting their breasts as ginormous as possible, and that’s why a class act like Scarlett Johansson will be loved forever. And by ‘loved’ I mean masturbated to. And by ‘forever’ I mean until she gets old. Because old people are gross and smelly.