Scarlett Johansson’s In A Bikini

February 10th, 2012 // 213 Comments
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I don’t normally post at 11 o’clock on a Friday night, but when it’s People Who’ve Had Sex With Sean Penn Yet Somehow Still Look Great In A Bikini Day, all bets are off. So here’s Scarlett Johansson and her new boyfriend Nate Naylor (actual name) in Hawaii this afternoon which means Ryan Reynolds has to make Blake Lively parade around in a bikini now or everyone will know Scarlett used to beat him before bed each night. That’s how divorces work.

Adding… Come Monday morning, ScarJo’s cellulite will be splattered all over the Internet, but you lucky bastards get a chance to form your opinion two days in advance so I suggest you use that time wisely to think about how it really makes you feel. (I’m going with, “Bubblegum Butt gonna fight that Captain America till my pee-pee get hard.” It’s simple yet clear.)

Photos: Splash News


  1. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Ganja Din
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry I dropped the ball, the cellulite was in my eyes…

  2. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Ganja Din
    Commented on this photo:

    Okaaaaay….. missionary style it is, then.

  3. assman

    assman would hit it

  4. JJ

    Normally I’m out on a Friday night, but as we age, we gradually lose our lives. Thanks for keeping me company Fish! First!

  5. JJ

    Dammit! I didn’t put an e-mail address. assman wins

  6. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    yay, i feel good about my body now. even hot celebrities can’t seem to escape cellulite

    • NYC gal

      I’m feelin you, t.

    • juicyfruit

      Most women in the world cannot escape cellulite. She has a normal body. She has curves. When you get natural tits, you usually get natural ass. Natural ass usually has cellulite.
      This pic makes me feel better too :)

    • Melanie

      I was thinking the same thing!

    • clo

      Except she’s not hot. She’s young and she can afford a personal trainer and chef. There’s no excuse for a lumpy bumpy backside like that at her age with her resources.

      • aristotrash

        Genetics have a lot to do with it. She might have to lose a ton of weight in other areas to minimize the appearance of cellulite in an area that people can only see when she’s in a bikini – and it might not be worth it to her, or she might just not care if she still looks great in a dress.

      • Kojak

        Her job is all about have control of her own body and face.
        She is a top actress, highly payed, and more beautiful than talented, so, is pathetic that she is looking far from an avarage actress…
        It is not only cellulite, but also a lack of muscles and the presence of a fat bely!
        And her genes are good ones. She is just lazy, and that will cost her money.

      • kate

        yeah, except for being a person.


      Don’t worry, ladies. I’d still bang each and every one of you. This is also an action shot. If she was standing still, the cellulite would be much less visible.

    • ohno

      she’s not hot, so don’t go feeling any better, you fat fart.

  7. Clarence Beeks

    she looks fine, but not spectacular.

  8. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    ok I get it, “she’s a real woman, she has curves so therefore she has cellulite” I get that, I doubt she is a glutton.. but you get paid MILLIONS, You KNOW you will be photographed, you lost your personal space and freedom for this. Find an elliptical already. I come from fat, yes just fat, and I dont sag like that because I work out!

    • Zoya.

      Agreed! Huge butt & cellulite run in my family. Starting running couple of years ago and the cellulite melted away. Didn’t drop a lot of weight, but I now have runners legs. I’m probably twice her size and my ass and thighs don’t look like that.

    • saks

      If she could act, it wouldn’t matter so much. She can’t, and she’s quite horsey faced.

    • lily

      an elliptical wont save those thunder thighs. im shocked her legs look like this, shes only 26 years old!! i agree with you 100% how could she think she looks good? these pics prove she is soooo over rated!

  9. supdogs

    Wow…butter face known just for her tits, which loos like nothing special here…and she is carrying AT LEAST an extra 20 ponds if not more…much of it hiding where toned muscle would be if she worked out in her copious free time.

    I’d rather hit my wife thanks.

    • Snack pack

      Recall the weird angles and odd shirts pics when she was working out with Spicoli? She clearly has the propensity to get huge so this might be as good as it gets for her. Still, appreciate the effort though, Fish. And our collective lack of having lives.

    • aristotrash

      She is not carrying “AT LEAST” an extra 20 “ponds.” I’m sure her BMI is well within the healthy range. Maybe not “ideal for candid bikini shots” range, but healthy nevertheless.

  10. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Anni Christ
    Commented on this photo:

    You were kidding when you said she looked good in a bikini, right?

  11. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Anni Christ
    Commented on this photo:

    What. Went. Wrong.

  12. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Anni Christ
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she at a fucking public beach?

    • Goldie

      Public or private, it doesn’t matter. She called the paps to set these shots up. New boyfriend, that’s what she does. Remember her foot in Spicoli’s crotch? She thinks she’s hot and she’s still trying to make her ex jealous. By the looks of it, the only thing he’s missing is a snotty attitude and a buttload of cottage cheese.

  13. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    Leggo ob my nose! LEGGO OB MY NOSE!

  14. luis

    for me? she looks damn hot

  15. forrest gump

    so there isn’t much difference with other FAT amricans.

  16. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    Effing gross. She lost her tits and her ass exploded like a bowl of cottage cheese

  17. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    wow a big guts and cottage cheese thighs. how the mighty have fallen.

  18. Eric Cartman

    Nice tardtoo

  19. mando

    “Can someone turn off that bright light in the sky?”

  20. Spider

    New movie coming out. Time to crank up the PR machine i.e. paparazzi photos and other goodies. Naked photos are trendy now. She already did that? Sex tape then? Gotta sell the movie!

    • cilla

      She pretends to be above it all. What a pretentious phony twat.

      • Artofwar

        ….Agreed. And on a more Superficial note—pic 8 displays how even a 27 year old questionably gorgeous move star can’t out run the cellulite demon. She’s 27 now, just imagine what the back of those gams will look like when she’s 37.

        Suddenly I have a taste for cottage cheese—and I loathe cottage cheese….Artofwar

      • All right, ArtofWar, you can say what you want about any celebrity on here, but you’ve crossed a line when you go after cottage cheese.

        It’s delightful, talented, sexy and oh-so delicious.

  21. Artimus

    Nate Naylor? Really? She couldn’t get Harry Balls or Hugh Johnson?

  22. Jack's Revenge

    Bit chubby but all right. Nothing special. Like her acting.

  23. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    sorry honey, you can’t outrun your cellulite

  24. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    I would hit that sooo hard! :)

  25. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s in mid-run. Mid-run is always wobbly and weird looking.

  26. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa that last shot… she sure has a lot of fat and cellulite for a person her age. My mother is in better shape and she’s had three kids.

  27. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    In addition to deluding herself about her acting abilities, she must have also deluded herself into thinking she is fit enough to strut around for photographers in a tiny bikini. Please post shirtless pics of her ex to erase these godawful images. Tks in advance.

  28. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    She could run off some of it. She’s just too lazy.

  29. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    The funny thing is these are staged pics and she thinks she is hot stuff.

  30. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d hit it in the dark

  31. cilla

    She’s looking really rough for 27. Reynolds ditched her at the right time. Her chubby cottage cheese arse doesn’t deserve his body.

  32. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    jeebus he looks 50 and even penn has a better body

  33. Terry

    I’d eat and fuck that shit up. So what if she has some cellulite. So fucking what.

  34. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Snooki's Taint
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey. wait a minute. that wasn’t always there!

  35. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    you are all stupid if you think this pic is real. I dont think one body can look like this from this angle and fine from rest of angles..this is so fake, if somebody has so discussing cellulite on buttie
    and back thighs for sure does not have toned arms and belly.

    • anon

      Geez, it’s hard to even make out what you’re trying to say. First off, she doesn’t have incredibly toned arms or midsection. Second (and I know a lot of men claim that what I’m about to say is an excuse for women to let themselves go), I’d say that most women with cellulite have it genetically; if they’re very overweight, it probably got much worse and more noticeable with the extra fat. I’m 20 years old and 105-110 pounds, and I don’t have much cellulite, but I have a little right below my butt, and even though I jog and don’t eat badly, it’s just there. That’s life. I don’t care, normal guys don’t care,no one cares. I for sure don’t claim that every picture of me on the beach where it’s visible is photoshopped.

      Stop deluding yourself and accept that women have (normally) rather high percentages of body fat, and with that feminine form comes cellulite. Scarlett looks a bit out of shape here and that may be emphasizing it, but stop calling photoshop on every picture that ruins your idea that all women look like VS Angels.

      • Dan

        anon, it’s really just because she slept with Sean Penn who just seems gross and someone you wouldn’t want to be tunnel buddies with. That is the whole thing.

        Physically she looks awesome.

    • lily

      toned arms and belly? her stomach looks incredibly bloated and her arms are average at best. the pic isnt fake, she has just chunked out…her weight fluctuates like crazy and that contributes to her abundance of cellulite. shes looks like any other average american female

  36. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s the epitome of a Nordic woman.

  37. Jam

    She’s just SO freakin average, it hurts. As an actress, she was ok in only one movie – Lost In Translation – so I really don’t get the big deal. Huge nose, very average body. A total butterface.

  38. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    So she gets all buff for The Avengers, then the day the movie wraps, face first into Little Caesars.

    Still looks good though, for an average chick on the beach.

  39. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    Not seen: Large bag of pork rinds.

  40. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    “Fuck you, other people’s stuff!”

  41. lily

    look like any other average american female. she looks stubby and bloated

  42. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d hit it out the park.

  43. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    (It’s like a Haiku, or a Dr. Seuss comments kinda day…lol)

  44. coyote

    I don’t care what yawl say, she can suck me off any time see wants

  45. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    you are now saying that all curvy women have cellulite? i suggest you to go get a life and see how it is, cellulite has nothing to do with curves, sometimes not even with weigh, Ive sen over-weighted women with less cellulite than skinny ones, just because all women with cures you’ve seen had cellulite doesnt mean automatically all women with curves in the world have cellulite.
    What I was trying to say in the first post was that normally theres no way one can have such backside yet toned belly and arms, and Im not saying she has the most toned arms out there, but compared to her backside, look like they dont belong to the same person.
    The fact that nobody cares is another story, this is not what we were talking about.

  46. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    and look at pic 12, where the hell did all this messy cellulite go?
    looking at how messy it seems here it should have been at least a little visible in that pic too

    • you’re talking out of your ass. just stop. no one photoshopped this picture. I shouldn’t even get into it because it sounds like you haven’t seen many women, but celluite on the ass doesn’t have much correlation with how toned arms or belly are.

    • Heather

      FFS she’s running in this pic! Obviously if she already has cellulite, which by the way IS GENETIC, it’s going to look like that. If you are skinny or fat and you have the “cellulite gene” you’re going to have it.

  47. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    perfectly fluffy

  48. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s photoshopped, most likely by her own PR team that wants her to lose weight [she doesn't need to, but...hollywood] without her knowledge. Scarlett is young and her legs DO NOT look like that. Remember the J-Lo pictures where it looks like she’s 85? J-Lo has awesome legs. We’re all being tricked. Don’t fall for it.

    • Seussi

      Haha that’s the one of the most whacked out celeb conspiracy theories I’ve read lately. Her PR team would photoshop the hell out of these pictures if they could: to ERASE all evidence of cellulite and tubby tummy, like they always do.

  49. Warren Piece

    I think the stats are like 80-90 % of women have cellulite (might be 90%). AIrbrushing and smart camera angles shield us from most of it, but it’s a reality. An overcast day, and you wouldn’t notice as much. Yes – she is average. Yes – she’s cute. No – she doesn’t have more cellulite than the average woman. Remember that’s what she is… an average woman that had “something” when she was younger (big boobs for her age on a smaller frame), and nice puffy lips.

    • Not Warren Pierce (Chubby Chaser)

      80% of women might have some cellulite. That’s a shitload of cellulite, especially for a person who is supposedly a sex symbol,

      No woman I’ve dated ever had that much cottage cheese and none of them were famous actresses.

      • Clarence Beeks

        I too thought she had a lot of cellulite. I usually don;t comment on it, because most women have some. But she has more than average.

  50. Scarlett Johansson Bikini Cellulite
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Need better shots of the BF. Thus far I am unimpressed.
    That cellulite wasn’t Photoshopped. It’s the real deal.
    So the backside’s a little jiggly; that just makes it more squeezable.
    The Sean Penn thing is SO much more disturbing.

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