Sarah ‘Paylin” porno footage (Sadly, safe for work)

October 23rd, 2008 // 72 Comments

Do you enjoy porn and political satire? Of course, we all do. So, being the Pro-American that I am, I’ve included the first minute of the Who’s Nailin’ Paylin’? parody after the jump which was obviously shot on a way smaller budget than the real Sarah Palin’s $150K wardrobe allowance. In fact, I’m pretty sure these people were paid in hamburgers. That said, the special effects are pretty sweet. I loved the tank crashing into the pipeline. It’s sort of symbolic of America’s dependence on foreign oil and, more importantly, the boner I’m about to have later.

NOTE: Video is safe for work unless your employer has a strict “no shitty acting” policy.

Photos: WENN
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Comments (72)

  1. H | October 23, 2008 at 11:51 am

    first in cali

    Reply
  2. tabacchifc | October 23, 2008 at 11:51 am

    the real bombs

    Reply
  3. JimmyBachaFungool | October 23, 2008 at 11:55 am

    Looks nothing like her and I prefer the real Sarah Palin who is hot. This boob job chick is gross.

    Reply
  4. hendero | October 23, 2008 at 11:58 am

    She’s sporting the big guns today.

    Reply
  5. JT | October 23, 2008 at 11:58 am

    Nice cgi action with the tanks… this is worse than a pizza guy coming to the door. I agree about the nasty boob job.

    Reply
  6. Obama will lose to Palin | October 23, 2008 at 11:58 am

    Palin is hotter than this chick and WAY hotter than tina fey.

    Obama runs in panic to Hawaii with the FBI on his tail .
    Barry Hussein Obama scrambles to find a Birth Certificate that does not exist. The entire Obama campain in disorder and PANIC.
    FBI pushed by CLINTON’s to verify Obama’s citizenship.

    Reply
  7. Dr. San Fernando | October 23, 2008 at 12:00 pm

    I have to agree with Jimmy. The real Sarah Palin is hotter than Lisa Ann. What they should of done is made a porno about Sarah Palin’s teen years and early twenties, kind of like a hardcore Election. If I wanted to watch my mom fuck I would leave the basement where I am living right now, walk upstairs, and open her bedroom door, because I just know her and her boyfriend, Craig the Exterminator, are fucking. I can hear them. Craig is 52 years old and doesn’t need viagara to fuck. That’s what my mom told me.

    Reply
  8. Alice | October 23, 2008 at 12:01 pm

    Who’s nailing paylin?

    Reply
  9. BEAM | October 23, 2008 at 12:01 pm

    “It’s sort of symbolic of America’s dependence on foreign oil and, more importantly, the boner I’m about to have later.”

    In that case, let’s not drill our own oil. That would make sense.

    Reply
  10. today's news | October 23, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    “New polls showed Wednesday that seven weeks after John McCain plucked the Alaska governor from political obscurity to be his running mate in the November 4 elections, Palin is seen as an increasing liability for Republicans.

    The Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll found that Americans are less and less convinced she is worthy to serve as the country’s number-two leader.

    “Her numbers have plummeted in our poll … what’s more 55 percent think she’s unqualified to serve as president if the need arises, which is a troublesome number given McCain’s age,” said NBC political director Chuck Todd.

    The poll also puts the 72-year-old McCain 10 points behind his Democratic rival Barack Obama, and says that 47 percent of those surveyed viewed Palin negatively.

    It confirmed the findings of an ABC/Washington Post poll released earlier this month which found that six in 10 voters saw Palin, 44, as lacking the experience to be an effective president.

    “A third are now less likely to vote for McCain because of her,” the Post added.”

    Reply
  11. Clarkehead | October 23, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    Wow that was a genuine pile of horse shit. When are the porn screenwriters going on strike? I’ll mark my calendar.

    Reply
  12. pete | October 23, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    #6 – even wackjobs like you don’t bother to try to say anything positive about McCain. It’s exclusively negative campaigning these days on the Republican side. Meanwhile the entire country wishes it was Nov. 5 already so that McCain could move on to his next task – trying to restore his reputation before he retires – and all of us could be rid of the mix of McCarthyism and KKK that’s become the McCain/Palin campaign.

    Reply
  13. Jackson | October 23, 2008 at 12:22 pm

    From what I’ve seen of the real Sarah Palin, she has big fat ugly knees and her body would be nothing without a girdle.

    Reply
  14. Clarkehead | October 23, 2008 at 12:25 pm

    Wow, it’s getting a little too serious in here. More dick jokes please. :-)

    Reply
  15. Sport | October 23, 2008 at 12:30 pm

    Obama supporters are whiners. Negative campaigning? What about your parties mouthpiece, CNN?

    Fuck off troll.

    Reply
  16. BigJim | October 23, 2008 at 12:34 pm

    It’s a good thing the real Palin doesn’t have a rack like that or the Republicans might actually stand a chance of winning the election.

    Reply
  17. mamadough | October 23, 2008 at 12:35 pm

    lol that was great. but of course, real russians would have just pointed a gun to her head and then raped the shit out of her, using her tears as lube. did any of you ever watch porn so old that the vibrator had to be plugged into the wall? they had to film it within a three foot radius of the wall? funny, funny, shit.

    Reply
  18. sore Sport | October 23, 2008 at 12:46 pm

    #15 – wa wa waaaaaaah!

    Don’t worry, pussy, it’ll all be over soon.

    Reply
  19. Rough Daddy | October 23, 2008 at 12:53 pm

    Perfect casting! her moose is loose just like the real Sarah…

    Reply
  20. Bene | October 23, 2008 at 12:54 pm

    they forgot to render the background instead of greenscreen

    Reply
  21. Solo | October 23, 2008 at 1:02 pm

    Hardcore excerpts have already hit the net. While I’m a bit disappointed with the character of the second Russian–I don’t get a real feel for his inner self–I have jerked off twice and am just waiting to reload.

    Reply
  22. Sell Porn Make Money | October 23, 2008 at 1:10 pm

    Lisa Ann does a nice job as Palin. Looks like this can be a winner.

    Reply
  23. Megan | October 23, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    That woman is terribly unattractive.

    Reply
  24. David Canner | October 23, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    I don’t know why you Right Wingers are being such sore losers.

    If Obama is a muslim, like you think he is, and if he’s not a real american, then you should be happy, because he will bring Islamic fundamentalism to our country, which isn’t all that different from Christian fundamentalism in that it is completely irrational, against sex and promiscuity, against abortion, highly patriarchal, for family values.

    So what’s your problem?

    Ah, the problem is this: Right Wingers aren’t Christians, and the aren’t Americans either.

    They’re Neo-Nazis, and that’s what they’ve always been.

    Problem is that you Right Wing Neo Nazis are so dumb, so slow on the uptake, that it has taken you about one decade too long to get your foot in the door.

    So sorry, too late, Obama is going to be President.

    Your leader is going to be a black man. Hah! That’s pretty funny is you ask me.

    Reply
  25. Eddy | October 23, 2008 at 1:13 pm

    I think this is the most awkward thing I have ever seen.

    Reply
  26. Deacon Jones | October 23, 2008 at 1:15 pm

    God, if everyone had this bitch as a secretary, there’d be “a whole lotta throat fucking goin on!” (obscure movie musical reference)

    Reply
  27. its me | October 23, 2008 at 1:17 pm

    #17 haha, no, but I’m picturing it!!

    Reply
  28. Andy | October 23, 2008 at 1:20 pm

    Too bad the real Palin is getting $150k of clothes instead of getting naked.

    Wait…she acts all cutesy and catches an elderly gentleman’s eye and he buys her lots of expensive stuff. McCain you dirty old sugardaddy! That’s a lot of money. You better be getting some serious Palin tonsil action on Mr. Shrivels.

    Reply
  29. DaveD | October 23, 2008 at 1:39 pm

    I can’t believe they chose Lisa Ann! There are so many porn stars that look more like Sarah Palin — Austin Kincaid comes to mind first. Lisa Ann has been around the block (and tanning booth) too much — even for a porn star.

    Reply
  30. Big Al | October 23, 2008 at 2:04 pm

    She doesn’t even look like Palin. She’s got fake boobs and looks trampy. I’d take the real one any day!!

    Reply
  31. Big Al | October 23, 2008 at 2:04 pm

    She doesn’t even look like Palin. She’s got fake boobs and looks trampy. I’d take the real one any day!!

    Reply
  32. Leo | October 23, 2008 at 2:20 pm

    Bottom caption reads, “This is a Parody” – priceless on so many levels

    Reply
  33. pr0n | October 23, 2008 at 2:21 pm

    she belongs back on the pole

    Reply
  34. pr0n | October 23, 2008 at 2:27 pm

    We are faced with some tough choices. The Black Messiah… a broken down, weird looking troll paired up with a MILF beauty queen who looks like her next step is a hustler photo shoot and still talks with the confusion and cadence of a fourteen year old girl. it’s really time to just check out completely and let the country implode. why kid yourselves? lay on a beach somewhere nice, get a job doing something online and spend your time browsing free porn instead of kidding yourself into believing that one incompetent self serving narcissistic weirdo is better than the other.

    Reply
  35. BigJim | October 23, 2008 at 2:38 pm

    I’d much rather fuck the porn slut than the real Palin if for no other reason that the real Palin’s cooter is bigger than the grand canyon. The bitch has calved FIVE TIMES! Tell me that didn’t stretch things out.

    Hell, her snatch might be stretched as wide as McCain’s bunghole after the seven years of NVA prison guard gang raping he got.

    That’s the real reason McCain turned down early release: he started to like the guards running train on him.

    Reply
  36. Tad | October 23, 2008 at 2:47 pm

    I can’t wait for the gay porno featuring BaRock and Biden Bendover…

    Reply
  37. sam | October 23, 2008 at 3:07 pm

    Does anyone else think she is gross?

    Reply
  38. Tad | October 23, 2008 at 3:08 pm

    I visit this site for mild entertainment when all else fails, but its really too bad that (mostly) Obama supporters are the crudest, ugliest, most mean spirited posters this side of the DailKOS… I mean isn’t Obama supposed to bring us all together? With these kind of supporters? Belittling the opposition seems to have become the calling card of those of the Left. Good luck with that.

    But as Thomas Jefferson said “Dissent is the highest for of Patriotism”. Oh wait. That’s a lie. He never said that. In 2003 [historian] Howard Zinn said it in an interview with TomPaine.com to justify his opposition to the War on Terror. Who cares? It supports your position and even lying about Founding Fathers won’t stop you. Now, attack away. I can’t wait to be dumbfounded by the eloquence and enlightenment of your replies.

    Reply
  39. Tony | October 23, 2008 at 3:09 pm

    I would not want a heartless bitch for VP. She made rape victims in Alaska pay for their own rape kits that cost around $1000! She kills animals for the fun of it. She has no quality educational background. She majored in communications for goodness sakes whereas Biden majored in Political Science, Government, and Law. Palin did not even give an accurate description of the VP duties.

    Reply
  40. Tad | October 23, 2008 at 3:16 pm

    To correct myself, the quote appears to go all the way to 1991 when it was uttered by the newly elected president of the ACLU.

    Reply
  41. BMurphy72 | October 23, 2008 at 3:17 pm

    BigJim, has no one evergiven you a hug? I’m not happy with either party, but you sound like a never ending douche………..

    BNow go make friend, hold hands, and sing cume by ya…………..

    Reply
  42. cleancutamerican | October 23, 2008 at 3:22 pm

    Let us see some pics of monkey face Michelle Obama in the same poses. Of course that would never work. Michelle looks like a football player in drag and big boobs on her would be ridiculous to the point of nausea. Not only is michelle not hot, but she is not even warm.

    Reply
  43. Keeping it Real | October 23, 2008 at 3:35 pm

    #42

    Michele is not running for VP and she is better educated than Palin. Actually Michele is more qualified to run for VP than Palin. Michele is also a humanitarian whereas Palin is a heartless bitch.

    Reply
  44. yawn | October 23, 2008 at 3:43 pm

    #38 – yes, it’s definitely the Obama rallies that feature supporters yelling out things like “kill him!” in reference to McCain. We had it all backwards. Thanks for the correction.

    Reply
  45. caljenna66 | October 23, 2008 at 4:02 pm

    Wow, this movie’s gonna make a butt-load of money…

    LOL @ calling the Kremlin because you crashed your tank into a pipeline. Gotta love the porno way of setting up a scene…

    Reply
  46. cleancutamerican | October 23, 2008 at 4:28 pm

    To Yawn: You must have been sleeping the last week, hence the Yawn. No one yelled “kill him” at a McCain/Palin rally. That was the imagination of a Obama aid who made that assertion to harm the republicans and give something for the obama campaign to cry about.

    To Keeping it Real: Michelle might as well be running for president. As in the Clinton era, we will get two socialists/communists for the price of one, and the price will be hefty. Regarding the education of both women, do you really think having 2 degrees, which were government subsidized, makes Michelle smarter??? You need help.

    Reply
  47. rustingrabbit | October 23, 2008 at 4:33 pm

    “Michele is also a humanitarian whereas Palin is a heartless bitch. ”

    That comment made me laugh so f-ing hard. *wipes tear* Thank you.

    Reply
  48. HAHA | October 23, 2008 at 4:38 pm

    To cleandoucheamerican: keep rinsing.

    Reply
  49. HAHA | October 23, 2008 at 4:43 pm

    And to #6 Obama will lose to Palin:

    If you believe Obama’s certificate is fake, close your eyes and open your mouth. cleandoucheamerican has some refreshments for you.

    Reply
  50. BigJim | October 23, 2008 at 4:44 pm

    What’s the difference between Sarah Palin’s mouth and her vagina?

    Answer: Not everything that comes out of her vagina is retarded.

    Reply

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