Sarah Palin quit her job

July 6th, 2009 // 117 Comments

In an awkward and rushed press conference, Sarah Palin resigned her position as governor of Alaska on Friday which left many people, including those in her own party, scratching their heads. Was there a corruption scandal about to break? An affair? Or was she just positioning herself to run for president in 2012? All solid theories, but allow me to float one out there that might make sense of all this: She’s a fucking idiot.

To further prove my point, kudos to the governor for threatening to sue the press for doing their job on the Fourth of July. Apparently there wasn’t an American flag handy to shit on, so why not go with the next best thing?

Scope Out “Sarah Palin’s” NSFW Hustler Promo Shots

Photos: WENN

  1. Dr. Levi

    if she’s angling for the white house, she’s picked the worst route ever. If the republicans have her in mind, they need to seriously get in there and manage the fuck out of her. You simply don’t quite your elected high position governorship 1.5 years before it’s over, because you don’t want to be a lame duck!! that was the most insane reasoning ever… and to thing there might be more than one person out there that thinks she’s sane, well-spoken, and intelligent!!!
    I personally am no big fan of Obammy, but he better get crackin’ and make himself unbeatable in the next election, or we all will be MORE screwed than we are now. sigh!!

  2. Momo

    To all of you idiots(#39 Joe) saying that Obama “quit” the senate early in order to run for president. the truth is he was a senator all the way up to November 08, He quit after he was elected president. In palins case she quit before being elected to any higher office. She just quit.

    In Hilary’s case she didn’t quit until 2009, after the presidential election was way past over, So in this case your not even stretching the truth your just lying.

  3. Pablo

    “Pablo… give up on her… you’re obviously a huge fan”

    Yeah, you can tell by the way I noted that there is no FBI probe, which was the only mention of her I made. Remember RichPort’s Ghost, when you throw darts at your Palin blow up doll, it isn’t going to inflate anymore. Maybe you can get a Hillary doll for the lovin’ and a Saran doll to hate on.

  4. You’re her gardener, aren’t you Pablo..?

  5. Yo Moma

    Fish: Stick to posting and commenting upon nearly naked celebutards and the like. . You are best suited for that. role. Don’t try to interpret anything or any one not liberal or socialist. You come of as a DORK and LOSER, LOSER.























  7. Palin's a Mess!

    If Palin cannot handle being Governor then she cannot handle being President. Palin’s a big mess!

  8. JAck Ingoffski

    So it turns out it wasn’t corn after all. Stupid pine nuts!! Doc looked at me like I was crazy. Embarrassing.

  9. Josey Wales

    Hey # 50: next Presidential election is 2012, get a clue dork. Obama has proven you can be a lightweight & campaign & win off of Twitter, you tube & the internet (al gore invented that). We are so screwed, get ready for hyperinflation- hope u have some gold & real estate for the crunch. Buckle up!

  10. I’ve been trying to figure this out by process of elimination:
    – Senate in 2010? No, Lisa Murkowski (who does NOT like Palin) is not going anywhere
    – Presidency in 2012? No chance of a nomination, she’s p-ed off the GOP top brass for the last time with this move. Plus, Murkowski is rising in the top GOP ranks.
    – Scandal? Who knows? The one that’s being mentioned was a long time ago and not that serious. Murkowski (again!) kept her job after a little scandal
    – TV? We could be looking at the next Mike Huckabee here. Or, the next Fox News anchor? Just the job for someone without an original thought in her head, IMHO.

  11. I did this

    I have to feel bad a little bit about this. I believe that I may have caused this to happen. I emailed Sarah Palin not to long ago asking her to quit her job and come hang out with me. I promised many days and weeks of sweaty monkey love to her if she would come visit.

    Stay tuned for any future videos of her in the news. You may notice a slight limp in her walk for awhile.

  12. Bennifer

    If these same comments were about Tori Spelling, no one would care. Put them about Palin & the Republicans get their panties in a knot. Yay, hypocrisy.

    (happily 3rd party)

  13. Sidney


    When Clinton left office the US had a surplus and when Bush left office the US has a huge deficit. Obama has a big mess to fix. I would rather have Obama/Biden in office than McCain/Palin. Al Gore actually contibuted to the invention of the Internet. Republicans depended too much on anti-abortion and religion to get elected. The people have voted and spoken and now the Republicans need to find themselves again and a new platform.

  14. Sam


    You make no sense. Tori Spelling is a horse face ugliest breast implants in Hollywood no talent mess that got a break from her famous producer father.

  15. Rough Douchie, does that fantasy, like so many of yours, end with Todd tying tassels to your ears and riding you around like a girls bike?

    Keep it up Fish, the desperation these posts evoke is hilarious.

    I can only hope that both D’s and R’s become so unpalatable that we can actually get a viable 3rd party.

  16. Ur Daddy

    I wonder if David Letterman is smiling right now. I know I am.

    She’s screwed. The more exposure she gets, the more people will realize that she is in fact mentally retarded.

    Even if you are a Republican, how can u want to elect a person who refers ceratin parts of the country as, “The Real America.” Are the soldiers fighting for you that were born in New York not real Americans?

  17. Yourworsteffingnightmare

    What a stupid post, and it makes the point perfectly that Palin tried to make. She quit her job, and some asshole internet tough guy on gives her grief.
    I don’t blame her. I’d tell the world to kiss my fucking ass too if I’d been treated like she has. If you ask me, she was too nice about it. She should have started out with, “Fuck each and every one of you in press, I hope your mothers die from pussy cancer and that you catch it after you’re forced to eat her out at knife point, you bunch of assholes.” Then she could get nasty.

  18. This place sucks

    Big tough guy talks shit about a woman. I’m sure you’re mother is so proud.

    Now strap on your kneepads, the Zero-bama needs a Lewinski from the writer of this article.

  19. Josey Wales

    Not sure of why the hypocrisy on National politicians…Obama’s just a suit, he’s clueless. Was he even born here? Barney Frank crashed housing & banks, Clinton’s partner to dirt, Edwards- no comment, Kerry’s a goldigging poodle. Biden is a flat out moron. I don’t get it? At least the network news that supports them is bleeding viewers- I love it!

  20. Buh-bye

    Why’d you have to get partisan?

    No more making $ from my click$.

    Last visit here, thanks.

  21. #69 – So… because she’s a woman, she can’t take it (though she has had 4 kids… she can apparently take it REAL good…)? Now being mean to a politician who happens to be a woman is somehow worse than if it were a man? Just because I’d screw that bitch while Bristol watches in no way means I’m a misogynist. Geez… I’m rambling more than a quittin’ speech…

  22. whattheshit

    This jizz-jar should stick to what she does best: Churning out retarded children. Seriously, F’ this hatchet wound and her whole backwoods, inbred clan.

  23. Winter Solstice

    Mr. Superficial, you know why you don’t like Sarah Palin? Because you are a homo and secretly you want Spencer Pratt to pound your butt and then have you lick it off clean. You are a homo whore, and you wish Gwenyth Paltrow shoved a strapon so far up your colon it would play the ding-a-ling-ling on your tonsils. You are a faggot sitting on an old chair in soiled 4 week old underwear, yellow in the front, brown in the back, living in your mother’s basement, waiting, dreaming that Madonna comes by and urinates in your homo mouth. In reality you wish you were Michael Jackson and could have sex with monkeys and little boys. And maybe you do. You will be nothing more than a sick douchebag, no matter what you do. Now go suck on some Hollywood and Liberal chlamidia you ignorant worthless piece of aids turd.

  24. Soupmanson

    This is what she gets for scaring the shit out of LIBTARD-Obama lickers. They have had it out for her since day one. She scared the shit out of , well, the shit eaters then, and she does now. Her poop has more experience than our current Teleprompter in Chief.

    oh, PS, FUCK OBAMA and his wife, THE WOOKIE.

  25. Jon Boy Hankensfield

    She has a purdy mouth.

  26. me

    Wow, you right wingers are sure angry and bored today. Are you gearing up to petition to have our freedom of speech taken away? She is an idiot, go review the interviews. It’s Fact.

  27. dookie

    Who wants moron, cowboy(or girl) politics that only results in a broken economy and wasteful wars. I (and clearly most of America) am tired of the anti-gay, pro-christian, anti-abortion religious zealots that have become the base of the republican party. Your time is over.

  28. Christina

    #23- You’re seriously saying that liberals hate Sarah Palin more than they hate the terrorists who killed thousands of innocent Americans on 9/11?? Are you fucking kidding me?

    Palin was scrutinized more than other candidates because 95% of people had no idea who she was before McCain picked her. Had Obama picked a virtual unknown as runningmate, you can be damn sure there would’ve been a ton of press on that person as well. Would you really have preferred having zero coverage on Palin, considering she supposedly re-energized the Republican base?

    Politicians quitting their jobs for a higher position is common and not really a big deal, but Palin decided to hold an awkward press conference the day before the 4th of July (trying to get maximum media coverage, I assume) and just say she was quitting. She did not lay out future plans, meaning she might not have any. If she quit and specifically said she had her sights set on the White House or wanted to be a Senator or something, that would be different. But she just quit.

    I read that 2 of the 15 ethics complaints have been looked at further. I don’t know details about them but anyone who would file a false ethics complaint against a public official because they disagree with their politics is pathetic. I assume you would be equally outraged if a Democratic governor had to spend an equal amount of time and money defending themselves against false allegations of ethics violations.

    Palin is anything but “hugely popular”. Liberals and most moderates do not like her. She only appeals to the extremely conservative base, which doesn’t do a lot of good, because its not like those hardcore right-wing Republicans were going to vote for Obama if McCain didn’t pick a right-wing runningmate. It makes zero political sense to pander to the extremists in your party because they will vote for you no matter what. Palin will NEVER have enough support to get anywhere near the White House unless she radically changes her views on issues to become more moderate, in which case her base of supporters would no longer worship her.

  29. Dane

    I come here for tits not your retarded personal opinions. So unless Palin is showing some nipple keep your mouth shut.

  30. The Original Shawn

    Let me get this straight. The current Prez thinks the key to energizing the economy is the one-two punch of having the government take on an unholy amount of debt and passing laws that will make everything more expensive, but Sarah Palin is the one who’s an idiot.


  31. Rupert

    Why are they scratching their hands? Maybe they have eczema. My mom hand eczema on her hand once and it was itchy. They should see the doctor.

  32. Palin is an Idiot


    We already have a huge deficit because of the war Bush started. Obama is trying to get the economy going again. I already have to pay more taxes in California because of a Republican that I voted for and California is in 24 million debt. I make a decent living and am willing to pay more taxes. I am not thrilled about paying more taxes, but the government needs to get money some way.

  33. black & beautiful

    @ Ted Tedlinson, #26: 57 states?

    . . . Really? Exactly what country do you think Palin will be visiting?

    And, as a follow-up: what more proof does anyone need that Palin supporters are completely retarded?

  34. mike

    You just told the world that you are an idiot because you believe that someone married to Maria Shriever would be a conservative. But it will get better for you, because misery is being spread equally, and your retarded electorate will raise your taxes so much that you are willing to pay for. BTW I didn’t know that jacking was a decent living.

  35. black & beautiful

    @ Josey Wales, #41: Hmm, good question. Maybe you’d get an answer if you asked Vitter, Sanford, Gingrich, Craig, Delay, Lott, Stevens, Foley, Palin, Bachman, Harris, Cheney or Bush.

  36. MidnightRambler

    Re. # 84

    black and beautiful,

    It was the Dear Leader himself who Referred to visiting “fifty-seven” states, “with one left to go”, in a campaign speech in Oregon.

    It is your Dear Leader who thinks the US has fifty-eight states, not Palin. By your own definition, that makes the Dear Leader, AKA OBama, “completely retarded”. Thanks for admitting what libertarians already knew.

  37. justifiable

    #81 It’s very simple economics – you can’t spend more if less is coming in. The repubs never got it through their heads that if they don’t raise taxes, they can’t continue to spend as if they have.

    Maybe you don’t get that if you don’t raise taxes but increase your spending, and then give out rebates to be popular as well, you’ll tear through a budget surplus in no time. If you then start a two-country war and have to borrow money from the Chinese to keep going while shovelling large amounts out the back door in sweetheart contract deals, you’ll have even more debt. If you deregulate banking laws that allow banks to write loans to people who can’t afford them, you’ll create a housing bubble that will pop and take banks, homeowners and businesses that are heavily reliant on credit down with it.

    The unholy debt was acquired way before Obama came on the scene. Blame the ones who started the fire, not the people who are trying to put it out. You’re bitching about how much the water’s costing while your house in burning down.

  38. The Original Shawn

    @ 83, no one can deny Obama is trying. The question is “how is it working out so far?” The government has taken custody of numerous failing private businesses, we’re hundreds of billions FARTHER in debt on top of anything W Bush (of whom I was no fan, BTW) did, and the only thing we have to show for it is a still-lethargic economy with a still-rising unemployment rate now nearing double digits. Still to come are the inflationary effects of all this borrowed money and the added consumer costs of an all-inclusive cap-and-trade bill ostensibly passed in the name of global warming. Together, this is a recipe for disaster.

    As far as California’s and your own situation, 1) that Ahnold was able to run as a Republican in the first place just proves how screwed up the GOP is; 2) let’s not forget that California lays claim to being probably the most “progressive” state in the union, so by all means it should be utopia if such policies work; and 3) the answer to government debt isn’t for the government to squeeze more out of those already paying taxes, it’s lowering taxes in order to encourage consumer spending and economic development which in turn creates more taxable income and investments across the board. When tax rates go down, government revenues actually go UP. As a matter of historical fact, that works EVERY time it’s tried. Even JFK successfully championed that policy. The problem with doing that now is that some people want to have a conniption fit when free enterprise results in some people doing better than others. They think it’s far better to just have everyone equally miserable.

    Instead of just dutifully paying your higher taxes, you should challenge the reasoning behind and efficacy of how they’re spent.

  39. tired

    “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

  40. my comment

    Illegals cost the US taxpayer 10 times the amount of the war in Iraq.

  41. justifiable

    #91 You mean the illegals that Bush wanted to give amnesty to? I’ve seen how much cooperation ICE gives to law enforcement here in CA – none. They go after the nannies and leave the gang leaders alone and claim deportation costs too much. I love politicans who whore after future voters instead of representing the people who elected them.

  42. Josey Wales

    Hey Blackie @ 86: Or ask McGreevey, Blagojevich, Barney Frank, Spitzer, Bubba Clinton, Edwards, Jefferson or Marion Barry…

  43. Mama Pinkus

    she is a repuke whore

  44. The Original Shawn

    @88, you’re half right. Absolutely, you can’t spend more than is coming in and stay in the black.

    However, it’s also simple economics that the more money you take from people, the less they’ll have to spend and/or invest elsewhere, which drags the economy down. $50 more paid in taxes is $50 less someone has available to spend on something else upon which someone else’s job relies. If things slow down at a restaurant, the the cook gets let go. If fewer video games are sold, programmers get laid off. Not to mention both the restaurant and the video game company themselves pay less in taxes since they’re making less money. Less economic activity = less taxes being paid, as you can’t tax income that’s simply not there. To borrow from your own analogy, higher taxes save the water at the larger expense of the home.

    For some reason, everybody can agree that “stimulus checks” and “relief” are wonderful ideas to kick-start an economy on a sporadic basis, but few see the benefits of carrying that boost over into a full-time policy.

    Back to the deficits, yes, the Bush years put us in a huge hole, even historically and relatively speaking in terms of past debt levels. The question now is how is Obama renting a backhoe to dig even farther and faster EVER going to fix that?

    And BTW, it wasn’t “deregulation” of banks that caused the mortgage problem. It was the federal government’s dictation to the mortgage industry that people who were at a high risk of not being able to make payments were to be given loans anyway. Did you know “Fannie Mae” and “Freddie Mac”–the lenders at the center of the whole mess–are, respectively, shorthand for “Federal National Mortgage Association” and “Federal Home Loan Mortgage Corporation”–which were, as their names suggest, government-sponsored companies? Look it up if you don’t believe me. In a nutshell, what happened was that in the late ’90s and early ’00s, tthe brilliant folks in D.C. decided people who can’t afford houses should be able to buy them anyway, so they pressured the private banks to make bad loans. The banks said, “We can’t do that because it’s stupid,” so D.C. said, “OK, how about this? You make the loans, then we’ll have Fannie or Freddie take most of them off your hands.” The banks (having little choice) went along with it, and what followed was an all-too-predictable outcome, at the end of which the parties most responsible absolved themselves of all blame at the expense of a largely ignorant public.

  45. justifiable

    #95 “This Administration will constantly strive to promote an ownership society in America. We want more people owning their own home. It is in our national interest that more people own their own home. After all, if you own your own home, you have a vital stake in the future of our country.”
    - President George W. Bush, December 16, 2003

    Just like Brownie doing one helluva job, the reality fell far short of the concept.

    Are you seriously going to argue that the 1999 deregulatory Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act that burned down the firewalls that were put up to prevent another Great Depression-type bank failure isn’t responsible? That act repealed part of the Glass-Steagall Act, which prohibited banks and insurance companies from consolidating into bigger, larger conglomerates that can engage in speculative activities with your money.

    Oh, the poor commercial banks, investment banks, securities firms and insurance companies who had no choice but to consolidate! Oh, the humanities! Why, it ‘s just like when Enron was forced to adopt that horrible mark-to-market accounting system from Arthur Andersen! Why Citibank was arm-twisted to buy Travelers and combine banking, secutities and insurance businesses to make Citigroup – so all the branches would just consolidate with no watchdogs required.

    Banking industries have been yammering for this deregulation since Reagan, and Greenspan just knew the market would regulate itself. He was wrong.

    If that wasn’t enough, Gramm tacked on the Commodity Futures Modernization Act. This act deregulated derivatives, aka futures. Now each company that held derivatives, like subprime mortgage bundles, could determine the value of those mortagaes themselves when calculating the value of their liquid assets, without any government verification. Any company that wanted to overextend itself could simply overvalue its derivatives and hope to Christ they didn’t get caught in a cash crunch. Just like Enron with its fictitious balance sheets.

    It all tanked together. Big complicated companies with huge internal incentives and no regulation take speculative risks, and those companies that caused the crisis by those disastrous investment policies were now so interwined and so big that the government felt that they could not be allowed to fail.

    Unfortunately there’s no quick fix for anything and we’re a coountry that wants everything right NOW. It took us 10 years and a World War to help us dig our way of the last crisis that approached this magnitude and we’re only 10 months into this one.

  46. justifiable

    #95 P.S. Don’t forget Bush’s 2004 Zero-Downpayment Initiative! The Federal Housing Administration had to insure mortgages for first-time homebuyers without a downpayment. Heckuva job there, too.

    What you should never do in a recession is raise taxes, you should cut nonessential spending. Sacramento doesn’t get that and has instituted a hike in what it calls “fees” – which are really taxes. Ahnuld is in a bind because the interests like the teacher’s unions lthat got him elected will pull their support if he cuts their unbilicus or eliminates cushy gubmint positions and programs.

  47. ryan24

    looks like the original shawn is one of the few people on this sight with a brain, good job shawn, very valid points.

    No.66 there is a decent 3rd party, their called libertarians.

    No.22 are you fucking stupid? she had 2 babies in 8 months, damn she works fast doesn’t she?

    half of you people talk about how stupid palin is when the current vice president has the IQ of a fucking platypus! i bet you if biden and bush took IQ tests, biden’s would be 50 points lower.

  48. Truth Doctor

    I have a different theory: YOU are a fucking idiot. Equating suing the press with shitting on the flag is one of the stupidest things I’ve heard this year. Even dumber than “they can’t pay it back? Bah, give ‘em the mortgage anyway”. Grow a brain fish, you need one.

  49. Truth Doctor

    #97: Bush never had a “zero down initiative”. Carter is the one that started the “homeownership society”. Please check your facts before posting.

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