Sarah Jessica Parker is packing her bags

January 7th, 2009 // 55 Comments

Seen here apparently wearing my bathrobe in public, Sarah Jessica Parker is getting the ready to hit the ol’ dusty trail and move away from the allegedly unfaithful Matthew Broderick, according to Star:

“The time has come when she realizes it just isn’t worth it,” a friend of the couple tells Star. “Sarah Jessica is determined to get her own place and bring down the curtain on her marriage.”
Adds another insider: “Sarah’s not stupid. She knows exactly what’s going on. For a while it was easier for her to stay than go through a harsh divorce. They’re essentially living separate lives.”

Matthew Broderick’s penis released the following statement:

I’m still not coming out and you can’t make me. Not without a coroner’s report, and I’m allowed to identify the body. Oh, God, there she is! Wait. Just a horse. Just a horse.

Photos: Splash News
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  1. Victoria

    That kids needs a haircut. Reese Witherspoon has the right idea- give your son a crewcut

  2. She isn't that bad

    she is better than him.
    I don’t know why you queers give her such a bad time. She is a slightly less attractive, but more talented version of your idol Maniston.
    Broderick is a fat nerd.

  3. Hereditary Actress

    She is amoungst the 70%! This ugly bony bitch would never have made it otherwise.

  4. The first time I ever heard the term ButterFace was in reference to Parker.

  5. I should be only one, but I think he can really look beautiful. Depending on the angle. Anyway, I applaud her finally to leave him, if he is cheating. However, they were a lovely couple. Sadly it came to an end.

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