Sarah Jessica Parker is classically beautiful (i.e. ugly)

October 3rd, 2007 // 169 Comments
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Where’s He-Man? Skeletor’s running around in a wedding dress again. No, hold on, it’s Sarah Jessica Parker on the set of the Sex and the City movie. Gross. So the guy who has to marry her committed some sort of awful crime right? What’d he do; murder the president’s daughter by blowing up a bus full of schoolchildren and baby pandas? Even then marrying Sarah Jessica Parker is a bit harsh. Couldn’t they just give him a lethal injection?

NOTE: This is maybe the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

Images: Splash
superficial

  1. Starr

    Jeez, you could have warned about a spoiler.

  2. mpmommy

    I can’t quite place the face … oh yes, it’s Wallis Simpson!
    That ill-fitting dress is a horror.

  3. lopelus

    She has tits the sized of steam-rolled kumquats..so I find the billowing chest of this dress hilarious. It’s like rats inside a pillow case.

  4. riphertoshreds

    This site dogs women because women are filthy and inferior, not to mention unclean. MEN ARE GODS, bitches.

  5. Big Dumb Oaf

    Does anyone have a closeup of Johhny Fairplays face hitting the stage after attacking Danny?

  6. windypoo

    You’d think with all her $$$ she could get that massive mole cut off her chin. Then she could eat it and gain a few pounds, which she sorely needs to do.

  7. Rozossko Jones

    She’s no porcelain skinned beauty, but she really doesn’t look all that bad. I’d suggest that she is one of those folks who look great in real life, but need just the right kind of lighting to look as good in print or on screen.

    She obviously works out allot, which shows in her defined arms and visible veins. I think that’s damn sexy, quite frankly.

    Her breasts look like they’re still “original equipment” and I think that makes them hella-sexy, even with the sagging. Fake boobs on a body like hers would actually be much less attractive; anyone who disagrees is completely in the wrong, by the way.

    As far as he dress goes: maybe less-than-flattering, but probably will be fixed in post and will look great on-screen. That’s how that sort of thing works, you know.

  8. JaneaneTheAcerbicGoblin

    She’s fucking anoxeric. Ugh.

  9. Eaves

    She’s like Leah Remini……they had nice bodies but then they have one kid and their bodies are just hideous. Unless they are strategically covered up, so you don’t see all the moles and stretch marks and saggy skin and cellulite and on and on. Sarah had a nice body at one time but now it matches up more closely with her dying witch face.

  10. peach

    she is classy, stylish, educated, cultured, moral and successful. All of those things transcend her physical appeance and make her a sexy, desirable woman who is worthy of respect and admiration. she has more value than to be judged by ignorant T&A standards. Jerks making vulgar comments only show their ignorance, . by the way, her characters clothing reflects a lifestyle few people experience, much less understand.

  11. LaDrones

    I have never seen a movie being filmed with so many photo-op leaks. Are the producers worried that no one will care or is it just because it’s being filmed outdoors in NY?

  12. Kathy

    She is just plain ugly i dont know why anyone says otherwise

  13. starlitaf

    that has GOT to be the ugly dress i have ever seen. or maybe its just cuz of the person in it…

  14. misha

    The designer doesn’t do his (her) work well. At all. That is the problem. The outfit is not conformable with her appearance.

  15. dogboy

    What horrible thing did her husband do? He killed two women and crippled a child in a car accident in Ireland in 1987. (Or were you talking about Mr. Big?)

  16. ***

    ugliest wedding dress I’ve ever seen!

  17. What in gods name is she wearing? her dress looks like its about to turn into a transformer..

  18. wonkyeyesez:

    HAHAHAHAHAAHA I WOULD KILL MYSELF IF I WERE HER.

  19. jenna

    It would be a fun thing if everyone had a pic next to their names here because I bet that at least 50% of you are less attractive than Jessica. I see nothing wrong with her. Not everyone can look like Angelina or Scarlet, but Jessica is just an average looking girl and quit complaining about her looks!! In some pics with the right make-up, clothes and hair she is quite cute actually!

  20. Minky

    Sure people feel free to hate on SJP, but every fan of the show actually knows she rules. I used to be on the horse-face bandwagon, but she I think its really admirable the way she works what she has.

  21. I personally think that the dress looks lovely on her, excuse the pun.. Ne way i just received a free sample of COVET, SJP’s new fragrance, . i got it from http://www.caseofthecovetedbottle.com, i suggest you all do the same!!! Its so yummyxx

  22. Mer

    Horrible dress. And I don´t like SJP, even I liked Sex and the city. She is ugly, she doesn’t have style. AND I don’t like that she made her own fashion line (???) AND a perfum.

    NO-ME-GUSTAS-SARA-JESSICA-PARKER-POR-FAVOR-RETÍRATE-GRACIAS

  23. MrSemprini

    Proof that she is not real. I mean, its like she’s one of those Disney animatronic statues. Explains her acting, anyway. But, that AWFUL picture, man, she’s hollow… you can see all the way down to the label on her panties. Ugh. Just threw up in my mouth and swallowed it back down. Eww, woop here it comes aga…

  24. Robin

    Horrible, horrible dress.

  25. Pat Field had the day off

    141, this is America. Speak English.

  26. Sugreev2001

    God damn,I just threw up in my mouth !
    This kind of ugly shouldn’t be allowed to roam the streets.

  27. Yes, I will agree with the majority here. That’s the ugliest wedding dress I’ve ever seen. I wouldn’t be caught dead in that piece of shit dress. Give me a Vera Wang any day.

  28. Tess

    I cannot understand why it is so common these days to always associate acting with havint to look “perfect” (although I don’t know if there ever will be a woman who these guys think is even near perfection). You don’t expect a musician to look perfect, do you? Or a painter? Or a nerd who has time to spend hours on this website every day?

    Acting is art, and I must say Sarah Jessica Parker is a rather skilled actress, not an AWESOME one but good. And damn fit for her age.

  29. Cap'n Crunch

    The only time SJP looked cute was in “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” where she had a nice body, not that size 0 corpse she’s carrying around, her hair was nice and curly and her face was fuller. Oh and on LA Story too, as Steve Martin’s little chippie. Now she lives in Hagsville.

    Sex and the City is a stupid show. I watched a few episodes at my sisters house and although it had some funny parts, it’s just another effing Melrose Place with laughs (MP sucked ass, my firends, and I’m proud to say I never watched it).

    I hate the fakeness of it. I hate how now there are a million chicks in NYC who love to drop names and brands out loud so people can hear them, like “Oh, I was at Barney’s” or “I’m a shoe freak” (God if I hear that one more time, I will shit in someones mouth) or wearing shirts that say “Label Whore.” that show is for brainless shallow tarts who really, TRULY believe that life is like that.

    YEAH, I SAID IT!!!

  30. BunnyButt

    Keep in mind that, in large part, what men think is beautiful/sexy/stylish/etc. is very different from what women think men should think is beautiful/sexy/stylish/etc. And remember the old adage that women dress for other women, not for men. The SATC women are perfect examples of this.

  31. west

    she reminds me of that dude glenn close was playing in 101 dalmatians.

  32. LP

    @ 149
    women dress for other women? what kind of women are those? i don’t give a fuck what some stupid chick thinx of my outlook. and i don’t look at what other females are wearing. their own fuckin’ business.

    ‘women dress 4 other women not 4 men’
    - this is some moronic statement trying to leave an impression that women don’t care what men think of them. that’s a lie. it’s sth that those feminists would come up w/. it’s their agenda to equalize women and men, belittling the men in the process of it. bullshit.

    u’re just stupid 149, and u don’t even get it.

  33. Professional Career Woman

    #151 – LP

    Women do it all the time; especially at work. Women have the battle of clothes with each other. One woman wears a short skirt to work, then the other woman has to wear a shorter skirt to work. One woman shows a little cleavage at work, then another woman has to show more cleavage at work. The woman are in competition for attention from men. Usually secretaries and clerks behave this way. I am a professioanl career women, so I don’t get into those situations, but I do notice for pure amusement.

  34. 15piecesofflare

    Whatever bitches. JFK, Jr. still humped her. Do you look like him? No, didn’t think so.

  35. BunnyButt

    #151, seriously, do you think most guys really give a shit about designer clothes, jewelry, cosmetics, etc.? If you think most men actually care about or notice this stuff, you’ve had very little experience with them. Men are looking at your overall appearance to decide if you’re attractive. All the bling and Manolos and $30 lipstick you’re wearing? That’s to make other women think men find you more desirable than them. If they were even aware of the difference, guys would be just as happy if you were wearing $10 Wal-Mart sandals and $5 lipstick, just as long as, overall, you’re put together nicely. Most of the men I know think the SATC women, and real women like them, are ridiculous.

  36. yukadoozer

    Save Kristin Davis, that’s one sad bunch of trannies.

  37. mkell

    Okay, take some anti-nausea pills, put on a welder’s mask, take a good look at pic #2 (with the bananna-peel boobs) and WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT SMEARED ALL OVER THEM?!??!!???

  38. MrsP

    Meowwwrrr!!! BunnyButt and LP are in a catfight!! They’re rolling around and ripping at each other’s hair and clothing! A cloud of dust rises up around them! Professional Career Woman stands on the sidelines, in her business suit, arms crossed over her chest and and peers over her horn rimmed glasses, watching for pure amusement! Texas Tranny runs in in his five inch heels and puts on SJP’s wedding dress but then tears it off, screaming, “Oh my God! Get Vera Wang on the phone! Stat! This wedding dress sucks ass!”

  39. mkell

    Huh. Closer inspection (dear God it hurts, and it’s really hard to see what I’m doing through bloody tears filling my empty sockets) indicates that it’s just some sort of wispy fake lace (don’t know what the hell to call it.) Nauseating effect, though! My first thought was some sort of anti-chafing lotion. I want to die so badly now.

  40. TT

    That is because you have TASTE! Vera designs classic, classy dresses.

  41. ZU

    She reminds of of a Don Martin cartoon from Mad Magazine.
    Something like this: http://www.nachshon.org.il/~itzs/Don%20Martin/posters/Mona.jpg

  42. Alex2374

    Not wearing panties is not something a true southern girl would do.

    That’s a flat-out lie. If anything, there are more girls in the South that would flash their panties, and on less provocation.

  43. Sploodgie

    149 and 152 are totally correct…..Go to a large corporate envrionment and you will see it and hear the gossip. Chicks want to out-do chicks all the time. And they also love when the male counterparts look at them, even if both are married (in reality the guys are making fun of them).

    And yes, women actually believe that men like skinny, perfect (an oxymoron if I ever heard one), unrealistic and dumb women. The real truth is that men like what we tell them to like and we, as women, have not totally figured it out yet.

    And #154, you are right about men not noticing the $30 lipstick. In fact, they’d rather us not have lipstick on at all. Women only buy MAC make-up or Chanel purses because another woman is going to notice the cool MAC compact, and the recognizable Chanel logo. Why do you think they buy the fake purses? Because they’re good bags? No because they want to be able to say things like “my Louie.”

  44. runawayfaraway

    She’s so freaking ugly and that dress is hanging off her, who would really find her and giant chin-growth attractive. I don’t get it.

  45. Classy Professional Female

    #162 I agree.

    Working as a female consultant in small and large corporations in the Engineering department leads me to conclude the following:

    Men will look at any female in a short skirt; athletic, skinny, or fat.
    Men will look at any female in tight pants to admire or make fun of and maybe see a camel toe.

    Men will stare at cleavage whether you are young or old or skinny or fat.

    Men will look period.

  46. EAC

    Loved the show. But some of the clothes were so ridiculous. I think the wedding dress needs an ample sized pair of hooters and she is not blessed, and the arms are just gross.

  47. kay cooper

    Always loved the show for the girls funny comments and of course New York City. Hoped for a movie years ago and the reruns are painful to watch now. Too much time has passed. Same age as Carrie and I can’t pretend anymore. Carrie and friends need to grow old graciously the way we do in the south.

  48. justtheobvious

    Damn she looks fat! I can’t see her entire esophagus at all! Whats with all the meat on the ribs? She needs to get on the Olsen Thins, I mean Twins diet. They all 3 have the good bag lady look down.
    P.S. Charlotte is hot as shit though. She even looks hot taking a dump.

  49. Alice

    I don’t think its fair to trash Sarah Jessica Parker, or anyone, based on their looks alone. SJP is an amazing woman with lots of talent, and the reason that she is looked up to is because she is average but knows how to work with what she has. I think many women find that more real than lopsided silicone implants, which is sadly the only way most men notice actresses. Yeah, the dress is unflattering, but her character is known for wearing wild and daring trends. I’ll still be seeing the movie no matter what ‘superficial’ posts there are!

  50. #151- If you’re a woman then I’m Hitler.

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