Samantha Ronson announces plans to marry Lindsay Lohan

September 11th, 2008 // 84 Comments

Samantha Ronson has announced her plans to marry Lindsay Lohan before New Year’s which explains the engagement ring Lindsay’s been sporting. Here I thought she was a busty jewel thief. Damn. The Sun reports:

Sam used her DJ slot at top LA hotel and night spot Chateau Marmont to announce the news, telling clubbers: “By the end of this year, my love will be Mrs Ronson.”
She added: “Tonight shows the power of a woman – to underestimate that is to underestimate the world.”

What’s all this “power of a woman” talk? Isn’t Samantha Ronson technically the “man” in this relationship? And by technically I mean she has testicles because you know what I don’t underestimate? SCIENCE.

superficial

  1. Deacon Jones

    Lohan breaks it off in November, falls off the wagon, and gets crazier than ever

  2. Power of a woman? does she realize if both her hands breaks tomorrow, lindsay will be no where to be found?

  3. McCain should have picked Lohan

    It would have made even more sensation than the whore she picked! And made as much logical sense! Dumb Republicans!!!

  4. huh?

    2- she’ll still have a mouth

  5. rough daddy's gay lover

    Hi rough daddy! Do you still love my little anus? I am sorry to expose you here but I miss you and won’t accept being used like you did me.

    Kisses and hugs and lots of ass lovin

  6. you ever heard of lock jaw?

  7. Bubba Gump

    Bubba Gump still does not believe Lohan will ever tie dah knot with that lezzy

  8. dave

    No boobs!? I’m insulted!

  9. simplicity

    where was she when these pics were taken? who wears that sorta stuff out..in 2008? sober?

  10. That still leaves one boob open for business if my calculations are correct. Too bad only one fist can fit up the rear end though

  11. bear

    doesnt she mean… dont underestimate the power of her immune system?

  12. Damn, I guess growing that schlong was a good idea for Sam, I mean Samantha

  13. i might hold a hunger strike, until lindsay come back to the hard and stiff!

  14. rough daddy's gay lover

    I am sorry if I offend my rough daddy, I want him to come back to the trailer park and into our bed and lie his bloated hairy crippled short body next to mine. I shaved for you dearest!!!!!!
    And yes I have heard of lockjaw. As in what you will be doing to my shit sword later toight baby!!!!!!!

    Love and asses
    Sweetums Brown (the new pink)

  15. LL

    The power of a woman to what? Fuck up her life just as much by marrying another chick as if she’d married a man? I mean, I’m sure Ms. Ronson is a decent person, but I think it’s a little soon to be talking marriage. WTF would you want to hitch yourself to the Lohan crazy train, anyway?

  16. morga

    You know….lately LiLo has looked the best that she has in a few years.

    Maybe she really IS a lesbian and has finally found true love.

    shocking
    (and hottt)

  17. obama bastard president?

    Will BaCrack Obama be the first bastard president? Both his daddy and mama rejected the jug-eared bastard.

  18. who can it be now?

    All these hollywood whores remind me of Obama’s mother who spread her legs for a filthy third-world caveman and popped out the unwanted, unneeded mongrel

  19. McCain is a disgrace and not qualified

    Wow I can’t believe a guy who finished 890 out of a class of 894 at naval acadamy is the best the repulicantards can offer. A guy with a low IQ and then an unfit mother to be his VP.

    AHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaa Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

    Right wing wackos!!

  20. alison

    Lovely, commenter #17/18, and quite on topic I might add! And some people question whether racism still exists in America.

  21. Jeff

    How can you doubt the expression “power of a woman”? Take Sarah Palin’s views and put them into a man and you’ve got…Pat Buchanan (literally: he agrees will all of her positions as stated…at this point…before her next reformatting by the men who control her). Put them in a MILF and you’ve got a political sensation that might win a presidential election.

  22. Prediction: Barry Obama will drop JoBi and ask Jimmy Carter to join the ticket

  23. jaime

    WTF? don’t lindsay, i have a really nice dick here for you, better than samantha’s dilldoe.

    i don’t think it’ll last, though.

    ps: kanye’s arrest got me thinking, aren’t cameramen and paparazzi supposed to get permission to air/print somebody’s face? which is why sometimes faces are blurred, because they don’t have written permission?

  24. Bigo

    #18 LOL third-world caveman… good one

  25. jaime

    #17/18
    you, sir, are everything that’s wrong with the USA.

    no, just kidding.

    no, i wasn’t kidding, you are an idiot!

  26. Sandy

    Like it or not, going all-fish with Ronson is the only “intervention” that has ever worked with Lindsay. It’s undeniable that this is the longest stable period of her adult life.

  27. havoc

    #1 nailed it. Oh, and add public backlash and a Britney-like descent into career ending hell….

    .

  28. Andrew

    I’m not going to criticize Lindsay for her lesbian relationship. I’m planning to vote for McCain, despite the memoir of one of his fellow POWs describing homosexual activity over the course of the 5 years McCain was held captive. It’s really not our place to judge this type of thing.

  29. Bob

    I figured it out! Ronson IS the dude because (drum roll) she has a secret penis. That makes sense since Lohan likes penis almost as much as booze.

  30. I love a mad Republican

    #’s 17 & 18,
    Another mean-spirited little slack-jawed hick Republican, I presume. If that trainwreck McCain wins it would just serve you right. Your stupid ass is poor and dumb, but you’ve got a nice tooth, there dude. Brush it, every once in a while, why don’t you? It’s a shame the rich Republicans just use you to make the richer Republicans even richer. Now go put some more lipsitck on that in-bred pig/Downs Syndrome wife of yours and lick your shrine to Bush and Cheney and Karl Rove, because you stupid Republicans are gonna need all the luck you can get once Barack is in office and starts putting all the Republican criminals who don’t get pardoned behind bars, you stupid-ass Republican.

  31. sixpack

    sex tape or this is all a hoax….although I’m not sure I want to see Sam’s nether region in any way, shape or form.

  32. Taylor

    I’ll bet after they’re married Linsay will still insist they’re just “really good friends”.

  33. comment

    She should change her name to Lindsay Bigtits.

  34. Sadie

    Hay all u h8rz y u b h8in on LiLo? Dont b drinkin tha naaaaaasty h8rade.

  35. mike

    @34 Speak English you retarded twat!!

  36. TrailerTrash Radar

    Wow, look Mom, trailer trash. Her mouth must taste like the bottom of an ashtray. Still, that’s probably better than the taste of Lindsay’s cooch – but who cares but SaMANtha Ronson, who apparently wants Lindsay’s cooch aftertaste in her mouth, for life.

  37. eddie slabaugh

    #30 – You are an idiot.

  38. Thighhighs

    Ok….for all of you bringing Obama and McCain into it…wtf? This is about Lindsay Lohan and her girl. If it’s all true congratulations to them and their upcoming marriage! And for those of you (especially #18…you jackass) that can’t find anything to say about the ’08 election and its cadidates other than their skin color or sex, do a little reading. Talk about the issues for once…and grow up.

  39. Jesse

    I disagree, the politics are totally relevant. Take a good look – Ronson looks like Obama and Lohan looks like Palin. And Palin definitely looks like the type of sheltered provincial white girl who’d LOVE to feel a truly big – so, black – cock inside of her, for once. I’m sure if their campaigns cross at some point, Palin will be in a hotel room with Obama on all fours with her big white ass up in the air.

  40. Jesse

    Of course, right now it’s McCain on all fours with his saggy hairy grandpa ass up in the air…for Palin and her mooseleg strapon.

  41. iwill let her suck myballs lindsay @ britney ya samantha play with her penis. ha ha ha .

  42. I love a mad Republican

    #37 – another unhappy Republican?

  43. I love a mad Republican

    Okay, I’ve got a conscience. I take back everything I saw about your in-bred pig/Downs Syndrome wife. It’s not her fault the Republicans have stooped so low to use Palin’s Downs Syndrome baby to try and get into the white house. Cindy McCain was probably the mastermind of that one.

  44. Kate

    SLUT!

  45. I love a mad Republican

    Okay, #17, 18, and 30 – I take back everything I said about your in-bred pig/Downs Syndrome wife. I’m sorry, but it’s not my fault she looks better with lipstick. It’s also not her fault that the Republicans have stooped so low as to use Palin’s Downs Syndrome baby to try and get into the white house. Cindy McCain was probably the mastermind of that one. Go ahead, vote for McCain.

    Yay #40! – Mooseleg Strap-ons for Everyone!

    Barack’s got more class than to go for Palin’s ass.

  46. I love a mad Republican

    #40 – Palin wearing a mooseleg strap-on is a “Palin in the ASS.” Get it?

  47. SaraPalinIsNotAMILFUnlessYouAreAMongrelDog

    The dudes that did Lindsay must of really reated her like crap to go this far the other way. I hope it calms her down and she wins an oscar.

  48. reated=treated

    reated = treated in previous post

  49. Jamie's Uterus

    I just don’t see Lohan chowing down on twat. I think she’ll go back to meat very soon, but go on a huge bender first, then rehab, then back on dick.

  50. shankyouverymuch

    it’s 9/11 bitches, 9/11 !!!

    On anther note … I’d love NOTHING more in the world then to spend an entire nite shank deep in every one of little Lindsay’s EVERY fine little orifices!!! Man what a fuck-fest treat that would be. :O)

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