Salma Hayek is engaged and pregnant

March 9th, 2007 // 121 Comments
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Salma Hayek’s rep confirmed today that she’s engaged to businessman Francois-Henri Pinault and that she’s also pregnant. The news came after these photos of Hayek showed up and people started speculating. Although it doesn’t take a master detective to deduce she was pregnant. The only other explanation for these photos would’ve been that she was training to become the newest addition to Sea World’s manatee exhibit.

superficial

  1. MadPet

    first time being first!!!

  2. TheMease

    Ha! first!

  3. bigponie

    she’s jump the shark…..twice already

  4. TheMease

    damn, I really thought I got it…

  5. MadPet

    next time Mease … ;)

  6. didey23

    yikes…why is she wearing a sheep dog on her head?

  7. Mispsp

    Is that Minnie Driver in the background? It’s like Highlights for adults.

  8. Truthseeker013

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    I’ll be in mourning now…

  9. bigponie

    To think that a few years back I actually wanted her to suck the blood from my cock.

  10. N'Arianne

    Is it just me of is the superficial a lot less fun these days than it was just a few weeks ago..?

  11. bedbugsandballyhoo

    She is going to be fat, sloppy, Krispy Kremes and supersize meals, let yourself go pregnant.

  12. Lucky fucker. Still, I had my money on the Penelope Cruz and the turkey baster.

  13. Chouli

    Pregnancy agrees with her about as well as it does Tori Spelling…she’s a bloated wreck.

    That purple tent she’s wearing is not flattering. She looks like Barney the Dinosaur’s slutty overweight cousin, Flabbitha.

  14. jrzmommy

    She’s not pregnant. She’s smuggling in one of her nieces.

  15. biatcho

    Why does Fudgie the Whale come to mind?
    Somebody get me a harpoon.

    i said poon.

  16. bedbugsandballyhoo

    @10
    Well, Britney’s in rehab, and Parasite is lying low because of all the trouble she’s gotten into lately, Stickole has a new man occupying her time, and Lohan is trying to convince everyone she is clean and sober, so that leaves boring people like Gaguilera, Madge, b-listers in bikinis, and pregnant models. No need to worry…one or more of them will break soon. Lohan is already showing signs of cracking.

  17. Chemicakitty

    Good boobs, bad hair.

  18. cole007

    this is not happening! No, Salma, NOOOOOOO!

  19. Let’s see her try pouring beer down her leg and into someone’s mouth when she’s 8 1/2 months pregnant. While wearing heels. Betcha it won’t be easy.

  20. chiris

    Middle eastern women tend to get fat when they start having kids… boy, do they get fat!

  21. lambman

    10- It’s not just you, perhaps its in direct relation to Selma’s attractiveness a few weeks ago and now.

  22. daylin

    Salma Hayek’s pregnant?! Wait shes Mexican right? I’m surprised she waited this long?! That Geo Metro ain’t gonna fill itself up with 8 kids, 2 grown women, and 1 grandmother.

    Salma looks much like my grandmothers foreign maid that used to leave erotic post-it notes in my bag, saying that she fantasized about bathing me in my blow up pool in the front yard!

  23. alaskanchicsickle

    Please Fish dudes, could you put up some sweaty mens with nobody to turn to but each other pics, aka McConaughey and friends. Cause I’m about to get my ass chewed out (not literally you pervs), and it would brighten my day just a bit.

  24. Ed Bambrick

    When she walks down the street, are there people yelling, “ALL HAIL DARK HELMET!” ???

  25. danielle

    that’s right, put in work
    move your ass, go bizzerk
    eat your salad, no dessert
    get that man, you deserve

    courtesy of “Kanye’s Workout Plan”.

  26. Shanipie

    Poor Salma, She’s gonna be all bloated the whole time, that sucks. I know I’m getting over a pregnancy now (like its a disease or something) although in her case it looks like that too

  27. Chouli

    @24 Awesome reference. Good one.

  28. Man, those shoes are hideous. When she has that baby, she’s gonna smother it when she breast feeds it with her HUGE knockers!

    P.S. Nice 80′s hair.

  29. vandelayindustries

    Wow, those sweater kittens are gonna be full blown sweater cats….soon they’ll be so large, they’ll have their own zip code

  30. jesseeca

    has anyone seen her fiance? it’s definitely not what i expected. but i guess when she walks around lookign like this, you take what you can get.

    i love the celebrity engagement/pregnancy combo announcements!

  31. S.P.F.R.S.

    She’s a beautiful lady, but now that someone has gone and planted a roast in her oven, she’s looking a bit portly & puffy. OOPS there goes another beauty.

  32. Fifth Stooge

    Lookit those big giant cans.

  33. jpjrocks

    Oh dude, ass in pic 3

  34. chris2

    That’s gonna be one lucky baby. I’d pay good money and kill my best friend to suck on them titties.

  35. jrzmommy

    She looks like the lady she’ll hire to take care of the baby.

  36. Cardinal Ximenez

    GOT MILK? Hell yeah!

  37. MrSemprini

    #29 I am thinking sweater panthers. In fact, I vow to call all boobies ‘panthers’ from now on.

    If they are that big now, how big will they get? FF? GG? HH?

    The mind boggles.

  38. jrzmommy

    Just how pregnant is she…..she looks overdue.

  39. beifiori

    jesseeca, yeah, he’s one ugly fucker, but then, he’s also one very rich fucker, and she can always close her eyes and imagine it’s still josh lucas and pretend when it comes to that much money.

  40. Jenster

    what the fuck, all of a sudden shes knocked up? when did she ever get a boyfriend?
    I thought she was dyking it out with that skinny ass Penelope Cruz

  41. RichPort

    Long time reader, first time troller. What the hell happened? Usually when I hear the name Salma Hayeck, I know my wang is about to become all huge-a-fied, but then this happened.

  42. PunjabPete

    She was doing so well too… 40 years old, still hot a hell and inspiring hard ons everywhere…. She can forget those days now… I predict she gets all Kirsty Alley and never comes back to hotness….

  43. bigponie

    This is a great example of “Shit Happens”.

  44. geniusscientist

    Oh, for — guys, that’s Salma Hayek in a FAT SUIT. Jeez.

  45. danielle

    Why in the hell is there a cocker spaniel on her head and two foreign cars on her chest?

  46. roflmao

    @20 – middle eastern? wtf

  47. supanigga

    holy tit.

    I would love to fondle those and suck some milk out of them.

  48. kirgurl

    *******I love this website, but jeez, give a pregnant woman a break. You get pregnant, your body swells. Big deal.

  49. NipsyHustle

    #30

    it doesn’t matter what you look like when you are a billionnaire. don’t you people get it? worrying about looks is for poor people who can’t afford plastic surgery. she’s marrying a billionaire. they probably fucking had the fetus designed by gucci. if the baby comes out looking like an alien, they can have it fixed to look like a supermodel in no time. you’ll be none the wiser cause that’s how ballin ass billionaire’s do it.

    the man has enough money to bring all of her family across the border. i’d marry a fucking three legged giraffe with pinkeye if it had a billion dollars. fortunate for her he’s rich because mexican women don’t snap back well after pregnancy.

  50. Fifth Stooge

    Waddle Waddle Waddle

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