Salma Hayek Met Gerard Butler. There Were No Survivors.

Sometimes pictures tell us everything we need to know about a story. Take this look on Gerard Butler’s face from a premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival where he met Salma Hayek . It’s the perfect mix of sexual delirium and anguished restraint. Adrien Brody was there, too, naively touching and groping Hayek as if to taunt Butler right to his face. They would later find Brody dead in the parking lot, lungs filled with a thick blue liquid. Witnesses stated shortly after the film began, a visibly aroused Butler burst through the theater doors with a large, squirming sack slung over his shoulder and sprinted in the direction of some nearby road construction. Only his tattered clothing and one of Hayek’s shoes would ever be found. In a statement, the Toronto police chief said “I’ve never seen anything this depraved in my 32 year career and I’ve attend all twelve of Rob Ford’s Annual Marshmallow and Crack Orgies.”

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Photo: Getty, VPA/Xposure/AKM-GSI