Ryan Seacrest is almost too straight

March 16th, 2007 // 101 Comments
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Comments (101)

  1. Ruby | March 16, 2007 at 1:07 pm

    FRIST!!!

    Reply
  2. Ruby | March 16, 2007 at 1:08 pm

    “ooogachuga ooogachuga!”

    Reply
  3. rrd | March 16, 2007 at 1:08 pm

    almost frist

    Reply
  4. bungoone | March 16, 2007 at 1:10 pm

    are those women’s yoga pants?

    you’re right, he’s “almost” too straight.

    Reply
  5. freak_show | March 16, 2007 at 1:11 pm

    Owwwwww, come on, guys! He’s not ready to come out of the closet yet! Stop trying to rip him out of it!

    Reply
  6. ponk | March 16, 2007 at 1:12 pm

    so that’s what wally looks like with clothes on.

    Reply
  7. whitegold | March 16, 2007 at 1:23 pm

    That second pic is too damn funny!!!

    But seriously, I don’t actual think he’s gay. Sure he’s metro and a bit of sissy, but something about him makes me think he still like’s tappin the ladies. Maybe he’s in to some other bizarre shit, like he likes to dominated or call his partner mommy or something, but still, I think he gets down with the woman, not the men.

    Reply
  8. bedbugsandballyhoo | March 16, 2007 at 1:23 pm

    Is he rubbing his butt in that second picture because it is sore? Hmm…must be from all that exercise, the “jogging” I mean. Yeah. That’s it. All the jogging.

    Reply
  9. bedbugsandballyhoo | March 16, 2007 at 1:27 pm

    @4
    I think he bought those velour sweats at J-Lo’s garage sale. I wonder what he did with the matching hoodie?

    Reply
  10. schack | March 16, 2007 at 1:27 pm

    devil horns and lobster claws. i’m confused.

    Reply
  11. GooniesNeverSayDie | March 16, 2007 at 1:32 pm

    Seacrest: Out.

    Reply
  12. Spindoc | March 16, 2007 at 1:36 pm

    Considering that EVERY single magazine reports on red carpet events….has he EVER brought a date to ANYTHING?! Hmmmm he hasn’t?

    Reply
  13. HollyJ | March 16, 2007 at 1:37 pm

    There was a old video on TV the other night (don’t remember which show but it was on MSNBC, I think) of Ryan Seacrest excitedly rubbing olive oil–yes, olive oil–all over this body builder while interviewing him.

    It was obviously an old video, but he was rubbing on that oil with excessive vigor.

    I didn’t actually think he could be gay until I saw that video, but I have to say… Liberace wouldn’t have looked that happy.

    Reply
  14. HollyJ | March 16, 2007 at 1:39 pm

    OMG – I didn’t know he was born in Atlanta GA.

    OF COURSE he’s gay. Atlanta’s the South’s San Francisco.

    Reply
  15. Jiimbo | March 16, 2007 at 1:42 pm

    What can you say about a guy that is spreading his butt in front of another guy other than he is a Mo!!!

    Reply
  16. Fifth Stooge | March 16, 2007 at 1:44 pm

    Butt buddies.

    Reply
  17. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 1:44 pm

    No, I’M FRIST!!! Ok, ok, I cannot wait for someone to be typing FRIST so fast that they accidentally type FROST!!! Then I’ll have to change my name to FROST!!! and all that.
    Anyway, yeah, he’s gay. He’s SO FREAKIN GAY!!! He used to date Terri Hatcher, and she looks like a transvestite, so…wait, who cares if he IS gay??? NEXT!!!

    Reply
  18. WTFiswrongwithUppl | March 16, 2007 at 1:44 pm

    Looks like they’re playing the air-saxophone in pics 1 & 3. The 2nd one…it’s pretty evident he’s batting for the pinkies.

    I’m not saying he’s gay, I’m just saying that his many attempts at a normal heterosexual relationship fail because he prefers men’s assholes.

    Reply
  19. HollyJ | March 16, 2007 at 1:46 pm
  20. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | March 16, 2007 at 1:46 pm

    He’s building endurance for hours of hot hetero sex with a female lady who has a vagina.

    Reply
  21. WTFiswrongwithUppl | March 16, 2007 at 1:49 pm

    Oh Holly that’s just fucking WRONG.

    I LOLed though!

    Reply
  22. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | March 16, 2007 at 1:52 pm

    I’m going to stab my co-worker with a fucking pencil in 3 seconds. Wish me luck.

    Reply
  23. bigponie | March 16, 2007 at 1:53 pm

    he’s just checking to see if he shit his pants and he’s asking the other guy to look down and check for bootie dootie.

    Reply
  24. HollyJ | March 16, 2007 at 1:54 pm

    22 LOL!

    Reply
  25. burningsensation | March 16, 2007 at 2:14 pm

    Christ, My monitor almost burst into flames.
    Hetero men do not “power-walk” together.

    Reply
  26. DrunkBlogger | March 16, 2007 at 2:28 pm

    Fuck you guys.

    -President, Ryan Seacrest Fan Club

    Reply
  27. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 2:30 pm

    Oh yeah #22? Come here and do my boss as well. I just found out that he can’t afford to PAY me!!!!! And today’s payday. I have freakin shitloads of bills piled up!!! KILL!!!!
    I’m serious, does ANYONE have a fucking quelude, I’m about to go the equivalent of “postal” only at a law firm. What should we call that?

    Reply
  28. Bugman4045 | March 16, 2007 at 2:33 pm

    those are flare legged jogging pants. I have only ever seen women wear flare legged jogging pants. FAG!

    Reply
  29. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | March 16, 2007 at 2:35 pm

    You’re working and not getting paid? Unless you’re a landscaper or you’re playing a gig at his nightclub, I’d say he’s your pimp.

    Reply
  30. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 2:49 pm

    WTF?!? I didn’t know I wasn’t getting paid…he always paid me before. Just the last paycheck was 6 days late, and this time I have to wait til Monday? This is why if you own a business, you pay your taxes EVERY year. You can’t skip a year and pretend 2003 never happened!!! What was he thinking?!? So the IRS is all up in his shit. Took all his money….blah blah, time for me to get a new job. Where’s my lude?

    Reply
  31. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 2:50 pm

    Wait, who cares, Ryan Seacrest is a HOMO!!! LOL!!!!

    Reply
  32. Mr. Poopillo | March 16, 2007 at 3:06 pm

    check out the picture i drew of him on my blog.

    hugs and poops,
    mr poopillo

    Reply
  33. schack | March 16, 2007 at 3:23 pm

    i’m sorry, frist. you SHOULD get another job. your boss obviously doesn’t deserve you.

    i live in a dream world.

    Reply
  34. schack | March 16, 2007 at 3:27 pm

    you’re so weird, poopillo. i get the concept. now you have to make the captions funnier.

    Reply
  35. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 3:38 pm

    Thanks, Schack…kinda looks like I HAVE to get another job…what a brilliant dumbass he is.
    And I agree, Poopillo, that’s gross and weird. To each his own.

    Reply
  36. TJH | March 16, 2007 at 3:49 pm

    C’mon, are there STILL any doubters out there?? Seacrest is dicksmoker, plain and simple. Questions?

    Reply
  37. ponk | March 16, 2007 at 3:56 pm

    @10 lol. that’s good.
    “like this?”
    “No, it’s like this”

    Reply
  38. troegs | March 16, 2007 at 3:56 pm

    I have the same problem with dingleberries, you must adjust. He’s bi at best.

    Reply
  39. outoftown | March 16, 2007 at 3:59 pm

    14, my queer hairdresser is from atlanta.
    gay gay gay!

    Reply
  40. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 4:03 pm

    #36, yeah…so do you think Seacrest is gay?

    Reply
  41. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:07 pm

    lmao. thanks for making me funnier than i am. i just couldn’t think of what else to write.

    frist- i was gonna do a PhD in Philosophy, but after watching my brother die over christmas, i decided I’m gonna at least TRY to change the systemic problems in health care before retreating into the universities to play intellectual ookie cookie with all the herd-hating academics. so i’m gonna wrap up Masters and start prepping for law school. if i make it, i’ll hire you just to sit around and talk to me :) it seems like we like all the same stuff

    Reply
  42. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:09 pm

    unfortunately that’s going to be a few years from now at best :)

    Reply
  43. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 4:13 pm

    Suh-WEET. But by the time you get done with all that, I’ll be a crazy cat lady living on the street, like the one on the Simpson’s that will throw a damn cat at you just for looking at her!!!

    But if not, I’ll totally come work for you!!!

    Reply
  44. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:14 pm

    p.s. that’s really what intellectuals do at top-universities… they sit around making fun of how stupid everyone else is

    Reply
  45. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:14 pm

    i love cats. especially fat ones.

    Reply
  46. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 4:15 pm

    Sorry about your brother…:(

    Reply
  47. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:17 pm

    well, he was never meant to live on earth anyway, if you know what i mean… but with psychiatry the way it is, he was a kid in a candy store. he went into status epilepticus, which means he was unconscious, and it started in his sleep… not too bad, i guess.

    Reply
  48. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:18 pm

    it’s like a never-ending seizure

    Reply
  49. FRIST!!! | March 16, 2007 at 4:22 pm

    Was he older or younger than you?

    Reply
  50. schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:24 pm

    he was 25. i’m 23.

    Reply

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