Ryan Seacrest gets bit by a shark, lives (C’MON!)

July 29th, 2008 // 38 Comments

Ryan Seacrest apparently was bitten by a shark on Sunday while at the beach in Mexico. It must’ve been a tiny shark because Ryan barely even noticed and found the tooth later in his leg, according to Page Six:

“He didn’t know what it was for a minute – he thought it was a stick,” said one spy. “He had no time to be scared. He saw it swim away, he got out, took aspirin and called it a day.”

Yeah? That’s nothing. One time I got bit by a shark disguised as an alligator. Okay, maybe it was a mosquito, but in my mind it felt like an alligator who later revealed himself to be a shark, so that’s what I’m telling people/chicks. Ball’s in your court, Seacrest.

superficial

  1. veggi

    Now the shark is HIV+

  2. Que

    Que noes!

  3. Does anyone believe this was a shark that bit him and not some cabana boy?

  4. ldsqtbea

    first !!!

  5. ldsqtbea

    lol that must have hurt

  6. The Force

    You are the funniest gossip writer of all the gossip writers.

  7. Bitten by a shark, takes aspirin and laughs it off?

    Not only is aspirin a blood thinner, which is bad when you’re bleeding from a shark bit, we’re not going to believe you’re straight just because you got bit by a shark and “called it a day” like a man.

  8. Beth

    “He didn’t know what it was for a minute – he thought it was a stick” and wondered why it wasn’t up his ass.

  9. What they don’t tell you is that the shark died later on!

  10. #4 – Oh by the way, you’re a douche

  11. #10 – Troll, I do agree that #4 is a douche, but I can handle those comments without your help. Thanks.

  12. asarmie6

    what’s funny is that it’s shark week on the discovery channel… and i think anderson cooper also almost got attacked.

  13. Kelly

    Sportsdvl – we dont care about your pointless postings. Thanks!

  14. jo smo

    Where are Shauna Sands pics………. c’mon fish….

  15. Apparently it’s Shark Week on the gay channel too.

    Troll #11 calls out troll #10 – how cute. Now, which one of you bit Ryan?

  16. sameshitdifferentyear

    I didn’t realize “shark” is the latest slang for “guy he just randomly met at a bar after-hours.”
    Thanks for the alternative-lifestyle vernacular update, Ryan. Feel free to continue ignoring stunning blondes walking alongside you again.

  17. Thanks Kelly, of course those were trolls posting but we all appreciate your comments and thoughts. Now, go fix your man a sandwich.

  18. dan

    shark = male counterpart to the cougar

  19. sixpack

    Aspirin AKA Vicodin. Or Percoset.

  20. Sid

    Don’t tell me, Ryan…the shark was very polite, right? And asked you if you wanted your stool pushed in?

  21. Creative

    Sportsdvl – quit being a prick man, these forums are for bashing celebrities not the people that post of them.

    No go back and make your man a sandwich

  22. Kathleen

    It’s a shame “the shark” didn’t kill him. Humanity would have gotten a glimpse of hope.

  23. Oh #21 – so someone can bash me but I can’t respond. Just like you did and that other chick. Classic. Somehow I’m guessing you aren’t a MENSA member……See, all I did was make a comment on Ryan and a cabana boy biting him. A troll commented and then some chick. See, it’s like the circle of life. Or, as you and Ryan call it “The circle jerk of life”

  24. let's hear it for the boy! (the baby boy...)

    “Oh #21 – so someone can bash me but I can’t respond. Just like you did and that other chick. Classic.”

    wah wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

  25. Tired of morons

    I wish #24 and his boyfriend #21 would just call each other and get off of this subject. There are numerous posters on this site who post a lot. If you can’t tell which is them and which is their trolls then you are fairly stupid. Sportsdvl (like others) make comments on the celebs and usually don’t poke fun at other posts unless it is some idiot saying “first”.

    Now, if someone attacks a writer on here then of course that person is going to write something back. Some people respond and actually do it in a humorous fashion (like sports did with his circle jerk comments). Now, if it is too hard to you to understand this then please find a different board to post on. Some of us “regulars” like to read the comments by sports, jimbo, frist, etc.

  26. So, you're a homo

    Looks like “baby boy” is sad that some people are making comments about his boyfriend Ryan Seacrest.

  27. I'm a shark

    I think “creative” and “baby boy” wish seacrest was the meat in their own private sandwich!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  28. haha

    nice trolling, sportsdvl (#25-27). confirms that you’re a total pussy.

  29. Sport

    The dude is still a metro fag. A 4 foot tall one.

  30. Where's Darkwing Duck?

    Yeah? That’s nothing. One time I got bit by a shark disguised as an alligator. Okay, maybe it was a mosquito, but in my mind it felt like an alligator who later revealed himself to be a shark, so that’s what I’m telling people/chicks. Ball’s in your mouth, Seacrest.

    Ha Ha Ha!

  31. Wow

    Wow nice Sportdvl, nice trolling man, seriously, good stuff. Classic! I love it!

  32. CJ

    Rejected by a shark….how low can you go?

  33. shar

    WHO CARES???????????????????

  34. Tapeworm

    At least she didn’t get bitten in her vagina. I mean he. I mean she.

  35. If he was a real man, he would have chased the shark only to bite him back. We now have conclusive proof that Seacrest is gay.

  36. Toonkinstein

    FISH!!! at least you tell your tale/tail (tomato toMAHto)…at least you talk to chicks…Seacrest doesn’t do chicks man!

  37. gena88

    Have you heard that Heidi, Ryan, Tom, Jeff and Howie are all hosting the Primetime Emmys on Saturday 9/21 on ABC? All of those personalities sharing the spotlight…. that now that will be interesting….

  38. When I saw the headline of this post, I originally thought ‘bitten by a shark’ was a reference about him ‘jumping the shark’, perhaps related to the Dina Lohan and Denise Richards reality shows he produced.

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