Katy Perry and Russell Brand arrived together for the John Galliano Fashion Show in Paris last week, and apparently Russell has cracked the greatest code known to man since the goddamn Enigma machine. Page Six reports:
The womanizing actor, who first locked lips with the “I Kissed a Girl” singer at an MTV Video Music Awards after-party, recently texted her a love poem he wrote himself, according to a friend. “It was cute,” our source says. “And the best part is that Katy responded by sending him a topless photo of herself.”
I think Russell Brand’s friend is full of shit. I’ve sent Katy at least a million “love texts” without a response, and I’m starting to wonder how much this is going to cost me. Let’s see, 10 cents per text times one million equals *punches in calendar* I have to sell myself into white slavery now. Awesome. Anyone know any non-rapey slave owners? I clean a mean window.
john | October 8, 2009 at 3:31 pm
is it just me or do they look the same?
JADE | October 8, 2009 at 3:33 pm
That dude is sooooo freakin ugly. He has like weird Charles Manson eyes.
Richard McBeef | October 8, 2009 at 3:33 pm
OK. What is so awesome about her again? Her boobies are big?
eh | October 8, 2009 at 3:34 pm
No not just you john. I know it’s the uncool thing, but I like them together they are both awful and yet not awful all at once.
claire | October 8, 2009 at 3:41 pm
wow, he has gotten fugly.
I smell crack!
Frank | October 8, 2009 at 3:42 pm
Russell, if you’re reading this, could you send us that photo, please?
DJ Sirloin | October 8, 2009 at 3:43 pm
How do you punch into a calender? Sounds painful, though if it was a Jonas Brothers 2009 calender I would understand….
Mac | October 8, 2009 at 3:46 pm
He looks so dirty.
Gab | October 8, 2009 at 3:46 pm
#1
LOFUCKINL!!!
They actually do!
Malcom | October 8, 2009 at 3:47 pm
Shrug, these pictures means nothing to me. I’m still convinced he’s 100% gay.
adam | October 8, 2009 at 3:49 pm
two thoughts:
1) Katy. Perry. Topless. Photos. -must have. who do I kill? Russell Brand? Done.
2) WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT STANDING BETWEEN THEM??? IT BURNS MY EYES WITH UGLY!
DJ Sirloin | October 8, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Also Anthony Kiedis isn’t looking so good in pictures 7 and 8
Haha | October 8, 2009 at 4:01 pm
Match made in heaven!
lizzy | October 8, 2009 at 4:01 pm
katy perry is bullshit. the only reason anyone likes her is because she has big boobs.
but her face is NASTY, just like that fucking awful dress she is wearing.
Ali Knievel | October 8, 2009 at 4:04 pm
Russell Brand: Douchebag Hypnotist. Looks like someone’s giving Chris Angel a run for his money…
Yooarel.com | October 8, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Dude’s got a way with words. That helps. And he’s hilarious (most of the time).
Jarrett | October 8, 2009 at 4:12 pm
Alanis Morisette is looking less burly than usual in the last two photos.
Fletch | October 8, 2009 at 4:18 pm
Quick, someone hack his cell phone
Am I the only 1 | October 8, 2009 at 4:31 pm
Am I the only one woman in the world that finds Russel Brand attractive? LMAO Yeah, I know he comes off as an ambiguous, arrogant, slightly homo douche. lol But he’s quirky, I love his hair and intense creepy stare, accent doesn’t annoy me too much, and he’s funny as hell. Ever seen Forgetting Sarah Marshall or Bedtime stories? Both characters he portrayed were weird but at the same time fukin hilarious! I’m only 22 but I seriously hope I don’t become one of those fag hags. I find androgynous men so sexy. LMFAOOOO@15
Rancid | October 8, 2009 at 4:47 pm
These guys look like Klingons. Paint the girl green, and we have a Convention here.
Rancid | October 8, 2009 at 4:50 pm
Okay, that middle guy is freaking me out!
Catch you with my deathbag
You may think I’ve gone insane
But I promise
I WILL KILL AGAIN!!!!!
melissa | October 8, 2009 at 4:50 pm
he looks like a dirty pirate lol.. oh, and he does have crazy eyes.
http://www.thefamousphere.com | October 8, 2009 at 4:51 pm
I christen thee Mr. Pube Chest
Jenna | October 8, 2009 at 5:13 pm
He SCARES the bitches into loving him! Hahahahaha.
Jenna | October 8, 2009 at 5:15 pm
I got a copy of the poem:
“Roses are red, so is your blood…
…leak to the press that you’re sending me nudie pics or I’ll suck your soul out with my ninja eye freak powers! Bitch.”
It’s romantic.
Tanzarian | October 8, 2009 at 5:18 pm
I knew the ladies liked greasy pirates on crack! I was just 15 years ahead of my time.
canadian goose | October 8, 2009 at 5:40 pm
The Brits have some fucked up looking celebs.
John Prime | October 8, 2009 at 6:02 pm
Since when did Weird Al start dressing like a sleazy Armenian Goth?
norton | October 8, 2009 at 6:09 pm
Ok kids…. HACK THAT PHONE!!!!!!!!!1
Sextoy | October 8, 2009 at 7:04 pm
Damn..the dude is a playa..
Sarah | October 8, 2009 at 7:21 pm
I don’t know about you, Fish, but I use a calculator, not a calendar, for my calculations.
Alanna | October 8, 2009 at 7:30 pm
Russel brand is hot. And the guy between them for all of you retards is John galliano, the head designer of Christian Dior. . Kinda makes sense they might be taking a photo with him. The guy’s a genious!!!
You're not the only 1 | October 8, 2009 at 7:38 pm
… who thinks that way only because he’s a celeb standup/host or whatever you want to call him. If he wasn’t a celeb and he stepped up to you at a club, you would act like a snot, laugh at him, run, or all of the above.
Typical female … wouldn’t give the greasiest, jacked up mofo’s the time of day -unless they have some type of celebrity & money. Then it’s all about, “I don’t knooooowwwww [insert giggle] there’s something about him, ya know?”
Whatever.
yank and wank rhyme for a reason | October 8, 2009 at 7:48 pm
@19 if you are American you can be fucking sure that YOUR accent will annoy him, nothing grates more than an American accent, even the best ones are nasal and whiny. YUCK>
therusskie | October 8, 2009 at 8:52 pm
Fish, I think you overestimated Katy Perry.
Seriously that guy... REALLY?!! | October 8, 2009 at 9:50 pm
First Mila Kunis gives it up to Macaulay Culkin, then Kristen Bell gives the open legs welcome to Dax (… go away I’m batin’) Shepard, Megan Fox & Brian Austin Green (he wanted to be Vanilla Ice back in the day) are still grinding, Anne Hathaway & however her last loser boyfriend was, and now Katy Perry and Russell Brand… WTF REALLY?! Let’s hear it for really hot chicks with low self esteem! SERIOUSLY is it the fame or do all these guys have 10 inch vibrating cocks, and better game then fucking Don Juan & Goerge Cloony combined! Seriously though this guy looks greasy… wtf?
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ppl | October 8, 2009 at 10:25 pm
old and ugly and talentless….
Mel | October 8, 2009 at 10:36 pm
Russell looks off his guts
dddd | October 8, 2009 at 10:41 pm
that guy in pic 7 is soo ugly.
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nessaja | October 9, 2009 at 6:14 am
I never liked him much before and I fucking hate him now.
Darth | October 9, 2009 at 11:30 am
Lol what do you get when you mix up the 80′s Michael Bolton with Jack Black?!
B | October 9, 2009 at 11:36 am
He’s wearing a see through shirt? And she looks at the cameras, not him? I don’t think they’ll hit their golden wedding anniversary.
Gando | October 9, 2009 at 11:38 am
@43
Katy Perry?
Galtacticus | October 9, 2009 at 11:48 am
I couldn’t believe Heidi Klum with Seal as well.
Kick | October 9, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Raaaandal….oh Raaaaaandallll…..
third leg | October 9, 2009 at 1:10 pm
he needs to write a book
All Women Stalker | October 9, 2009 at 1:13 pm
I wonder what the poem was for her to react that way. Hahaa
-meream
Jay | October 9, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Yeah, she looks completely happy! Kind of… not really.