Ron Jeremy grabs boobies

April 4th, 2007 // 69 Comments

Ron Jeremy could face battery charges after a woman filed a police report saying he grabbed her boob and signed it without her permission. The woman asked Ron for an autograph at the Exotica porn convention in Miami Beach, and he allegedly “reached towards the victim and stuck his hands under victim’s blouse. [He then] reached inside her bra and grabbed her nipple. He pulled the nipple up and took out victim’s breast and signed his name on it.” Ron responds:

“First of all, there was security around me at all times. If they had a problem, why wouldn’t they have said something at that point? I probably signed about 150 boobs that weekend, all of which I sign ‘RJ with a heart’ and if I would’ve touched a breast, I might have cupped it while I signed. Rules of the convention were that you can not expose a breast, so I never did. And if this was a couple, I always ask permission of the male to sign the breast before I do it. Some people waited an hour for me to sign their breast. My line was second only to Jenna Jameson’s.”

How do you ask Ron Jeremy for an autograph and not expect your breasts to be fondled? It’d be like asking Mr. T for an autograph and being surprised when he told you to stay in school and drink your milk, and then started off on a tangent about pitying fools.



  1. I have seen this man blow himself. He deserves all the respect in the world.

  2. TaiTai

    Living proof that looks aren’t everything.

    Hearing his name always makes me hum that song by Sublime.

  3. Carsten5577

    She’s at a fucking porn convention and she’s all offended because Ron Jeremy touched her breast? The bitch wants to get paid, me thinks. I smell out of court settlement.

  4. ESQ

    An old friend of mine met him years ago at a porn convention and he automatically grabbed her boobs and said to her, “Who is this little cutie?” What the fuck did this woman expect a male porn star to do at a porn convention? If it was a librarians convention then she would have reason to bitch..Just another low life looking for a pay out in a bullshit lawsuit..

  5. TaiTai

    Yeah I bet that’s what happened, she started singing, “uhhh, caress me down…”

  6. Mizcora

    Forgive the ignorance, but that fat bastard is a porn star? Surely you jest…

  7. bungoone

    from that detailed account, why would you allow someone to get THAT far & not stop them, unless you were paralized. seriously lady, if you cared, you would have done something sooner. she’s probably just lookign for money.

  8. Ron Jeremy is God.
    Albeit a fat, ugly god,
    but God just the same.

  9. GG1000

    “Rules of the convention were that you can’t expose a breast”?? At the Exotica porn convention? Whassamatta with these people – what are you supposed to do at porn conventions, then? Sheesh.

    By the way, that is one ugly dude! He’s a porn star? I’d rather watch a baboon have sex than him.

  10. delahaye


  11. jakebarnes

    “And if this was a couple, I always ask permission of the male to sign the breast before I do it.”

    I love how he asks permission of the men and not the women. And people say porn objectifies women! This is undeniable proof that it doesn…oh wait.

  12. woodhorse

    this is so stupid I am left speechless. I am going back to doing my homework before I fail because of this addictive web site.

  13. woodhorse

    God Have Mercy Fish!! I would sooner have Pete Doherty grab my boob and sign it than this thing you posted. That would just be too embarassing.

  14. woodhorse

    How slow were this woman’s thought processes that he actually had time to reach under her blouse, hold her boob, and sign it and then leave to go on to the next person before she could think to knee him in the crotch or gouge out his eyes??

  15. woodhorse

    Fish, you have violated every woman in America by posting this sloth with the moral standards of a salmon and making us picture his fondling…. oh, wait, that’s what you meant to do.

  16. What happened to the good old days when you could fondle or expose yourself to a stranger or co-worker without all the hassle.

  17. LadyJane

    Anyone else ever call hime The Hedgehog?

  18. Jillia


  19. Forbidden

    That woman is just a gold digger who wants to get as much money as possible out of Ron Jeremy.

  20. Jillia

    I don’t care how big it is, having sex with him would be shameful self punishment. However, I’d consider Val Kilmer in Wonderland.

  21. wedgeone

    #7 – he’s a porn star because his member is monstrously long. Google up a pic of him to verify it yourself.

    Slow day at work today, woodhorse? 4 consecutive posts and the best you can do is “Moral standards of a salmon”? WTFF?!?

    “Pulled the nipple up and took out victim’s breast” – wow, that probably hurt, especially if it was a big breast.

  22. NotTheMomma

    So let me get this straight.
    Ron Jeremy reaches up under a woman’s blouse, under her bra, pulls up her nipple, writes “RJ” on it, and draws a little heart. Removes his hand.
    At what point did the woman wake up and realize her boob was being written on? That whole thing would probably take about 10 seconds to do. It would take her half a second to slap his face when he went under her blouse. Of course, it probably took about 10 minutes, because if this woman is correct, I’m sure she fought Ron all the way. And even after kicking, screaming and biting, I’m amazed Ron STILL signed the boob.
    This woman is looking for a big payday. Period.

  23. NotTheMomma

    #12, jakebarnes
    If Ron asks permission from the guy she’s with, wouldn’t that mean that she asked Ron first?
    It would go like this:
    Woman: “Hey Ron, will you sign my tittie?”
    Ron: “Hey boyfriend/husband, do you mind if I sign her tittie?”
    Something like that. I don’t think a couple would just walk by Ron and Ron grabs the woman and says “Hey dude, lemme sign her tittie!”

  24. Hemlock Queen

    Whatever. Ron Jeremy’s dick isn’t even that big. It’s half flacid in his porns. Gross. I wouldn’t let that thing get within 500 feet of me. He probably has crabs ready to jump off on to his next victim.

  25. Hemlock Queen

    Not that I’m saying stupid woman with fondled tit is a victim. I’m in agreement with the gold digger sentiment. But shit, who would want that man to touch anything of theirs?

  26. Biznitch


  27. NotTheMomma

    #25 Hemlock Queen,
    You are 100% right. But at the end of the day, Ron has boinked some of the most beautiful women around, and he’s rich. I’m sure he’s taking his crabs, limp ding-dong and crying all the way to the bank.

  28. jus'stupid

    GO HEDGEHOG. This guy has been my hero for 20 years plus. It gives other fat hairy guys a chance to actually get some good butt. Of course the fact that is hung like a mule doesn’t hurt.
    At a porn convention, and waiting for an autograph from a porn star….He grabs a tit and signs it, and you are offended. I’m surprised he didn’t drop his drawers and beat her in the head with the willy.

  29. woodhorse

    #22 – it is the best I can do under the circumstances. The circumstances being that this post has left me “a deer caught in the headlights”

  30. Hemlock Queen

    #29, those “hot” chicks were paid to sleep with him. So no, it does not give other fat, hairy, creepy guys a chance for hot chicks.

  31. Cut the man some slack, he had to live in a house with mini-me and vanilla ice.

  32. NotTheMomma

    This is funny.
    Ron has a Master’s Degree in Special Education from Queen’s College.
    I didn’t know that.

  33. jus'stupid

    Ron is the poster boy for special education…
    31..He was also paid, but he was always just a squirrel trying to get a nut.

  34. woodhorse

    (1) Wally, you are the expert. If a woman comes home and says, “Honey! Ron Jeremy just signed my boob!” – does that make sex better that night? If so, how?
    (2) Fish: I have friends from Kenya who laugh at Americans for just this kind of crap all the time. They grin at me really cute, ask if something is really true, laugh, then make smart remarks to each other in a language I can’t understand, then laugh some more and ask me more questions, etc. etc. When you post this, you just encourage the rest of the world to laugh at us. I wouldn’t mind so much if that didn’t include France.

  35. Christina

    I saw him last night and he looked pretty depressed going over papers, maybe thats why.

  36. Whoever said they don’t know who Ron Jeremy is must live under a rock.

    And whoever said Ron Jeremy has a big johnson must be smoking rock.

  37. heyheyhey

    umm Superfish’s same joke about how something is more ridiculous than expecting Mr. T to not pity fools is getting VERY old…maybe it was funny the first time, but not the 28th

  38. Lowlands

    I even don’t want to know what he does when they want him to sign on their ass.

  39. who is ron jeremy?

  40. LoneWolf

    @ #33, not only that, but he was a teacher before he got into porn. Real name Ron Jeremy Hyatt, I believe. Wonder how many of his former students have seen “Mr. Hyatt”‘ on the big screen (that’s right, he’s been around since the pre-implant-and-shaved snatch days when porn was films with plots that were shown in theaters where guys jerked off under their coats on their laps.

    Not that I have any personal knowledge of that.

    Anyway, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was charging for autographs, just like the washed up sports guys do at baseball shows. He’s notoriously cheap (his luggage is literally a paper bag) and whatever earning power he had in his prime is long gone. Guys in porn make a fraction of what women do – they’re basically props.

  41. diplodufus

    I bet he wouldn’t be able to use that maneuver on Kirsten Dunst’s boobs. At least not without crying.

  42. iamsosmrt

    but he’s so ugly …

    The woman was at a porn convention and she approached this man who looks like a rapist and asked him for an autograph and was surprised that he groped her? NOPE, No money for you bitch.
    But then again the new trend seems to be to settle and give lots of money to stupid worthless idiots who should have know better(ie K-Fed) so maybe she will get her money after all. Someone should try to pull this shit with Doanld Trump just because I’d like to see some Karma for that fatty.

    Okay I am off to go spill hot coffee on myself at my local McDonalds.

  43. HughJorganthethird

    The Hedgehog should have whipped it out and bludgeoned that whinning bitch to death with his massive CAAAAAAK.

    I once saw a movie where the HH was going down on a tranny and her cock poked him in the eye and he had to stop.


    God bless his soul.

  44. Carsten5577

    That’s one ugly Jew. Jews have a long and distinguished history producing porn for the gentiles:

  45. I believe the sign over the door that said…..

    “Exotica porn convention”

    Should have given this woman an indication that there could be possible boob grabbage.

  46. Pikachelsea

    “This guy has been my hero for 20 years plus. It gives other fat hairy guys a chance to actually get some good butt.”

    No, I assure you, it doesn’t. He is the definition of disgusting. If you can’t figure out that he sleeps with porn stars because that’s what they’re paid to do, then… wow.

  47. WTFiswrongwithUppl


  48. no1justminda

    My nipples invert themselves, desperately seeking a hiding place deep within my chest cavity when Ron Jeremy is mentioned.

  49. jxbong

    and all this time i thought you had hemorrhoids,they were your nipple’s ?

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