Rob, did you know that every time you say actor or acting you lower your voice to a whisper?
He’s genuinely startled. “I do?”
Yes, so quietly it’s like you’re saying Negro.
He laughs, lightens up. “What if we were ‘acting’ like ‘Negroes’? Then we’d be fucked–we couldn’t hear anything. . . .”
Okay, before everyone starts calling RPatz a gay racist and suggesting John Mayer just got a boner, don’t pretend this wasn’t being yelled at the screen during showings of Twilight:
“Don’t you open the window, girl! He ain’t gotta stick it in. Aw hell no. Don’t be dry-humping no bitchass vampires. Wait- DAYAMN! His skin be sparklin’! His skin be sparklin’. That ain’t right. RUN, BITCH, ‘FORE HE STEAL YOUR GOOD SHOES!”
(In my defense, I could’ve sworn that theater was empty.)