Robert Pattinson is the choice of teens

August 10th, 2009 // 50 Comments

To absolutely no one’s surprise, Robert Pattinson and Twilight dominated the 11th Annual Teen Choice 2009 Awards last night with Broody NoShowersmith above winning awards for Best Actor Drama and Male Hottie. Had I known this was the kind of thing teenage girls went for, I would’ve spent less of my high school years trying to not look like I lived in the back of a freight car, and more time asking chicks if they want to see my hobo sac. Ah, the foibles of youth.

Photos: Getty
superficial

  1. Kim

    alright then.

  2. where the hell is buffy the vampire slayer when you need her.

    Get Wet with Eliza Dushku http://wet.bethsoft.com?fbid=7gWEIONu3au

  3. youwishyouwerefirst

    first like always, damn imgood

  4. gil

    vaginal infection

  5. gil

    his nose is broken

  6. Kim

    Haha # 3 now you just look like an even bigger douche!

  7. Ptentacle

    I probably would have went with “Broody McNoshower,” it tends to roll off the tongue better. But, far be it for me to tell you how to do you job….. Do it better. Don’t hit me!

  8. I’m sure the emo/goth community is pleased their demi-g0d has been praised by the teen community of fucktards. I must be the only person who can’t care enough to follow the twilight series or its homoerotic vampires.. Where’s Wesley Pipes as BLADE when you need’em?!

  9. Cark the Brave

    His head is bigger than Obama’s ears!! RUN!!

  10. Mr Obvious

    Illustrates just how dull and vapid teen girls are
    Dumb lil’ twats anyhow

  11. Deacon Jones

    Miley Cyrus pics Fish.

  12. Kris

    He is NOT attractive whatsoever…in fact he is downright nasty…what am I missing that every other girl seems to see?

  13. gil

    Up for sale at my ebay store AUTHENTIC Twilight clothing from the movie set with actors sweat atill on them BID NOW!!!

    http://shop.ebay.com/merchant/pukeman80_W0QQ_nkwZQQ_armrsZ1QQ_fromZQQ_ipgZ

  14. SoTe

    He’s so freaking hot.

  15. Jenna

    Hey # 12… I don’t get it either. NOT cute.

  16. Mj

    He Kia also the choice of 28 year olds. I think he’s really hot and just adorable

  17. #10

    Truer words have never been spoken.

    #13

    Thanks! I really like cleaning vomit off my keyboard and monitor. Just the thought of the radioactivity of this asshole’s worn underwear brings a nice dry heave to mind.

  18. echoechoecho

    I wonder how much cock he can fit in his ass?

  19. #16

    I could see him and K-Stew driving a Kia. Nice one.

  20. He looks like he smells like he tastes like pee.

  21. sgedg

    You’re all bitter fat fucks. Esp. the webmaster.

  22. This guy looks like a total fag.

  23. tcash

    Totally missing it. I hate the way this guy looks.

  24. #21

    6′ 1″ and 150lbs is not fat. And bitter? About what, taking a daily shower?

  25. cam

    I’d hit it anytime, anywhere.

  26. ha

    I like to call it the “Megan Fox Effect”. The more people find someone attractive, the more a small fringe group needs to loudly and unreasonably label them ugly.

    That man is gorgeous. He just is. I hate Twilight, I hate all things that have to do with the current teen culture, and I hate bad movies. But this man is as beautiful as males come.

  27. laughable

    #27, I call it the sheeple effect. The more media tells you someone is supposed to be attractive, the more you sheeple follow it, no matter how disgusting this person is or Megan Fox as you mentioned. Both look like trash actually, but the media tells you they are great looking and no matter how much it’s not true, you sheeple just follow the lead. I see better looking girls at bars every weekend than Megan Fox, without trashy tattoos on their forearms. This dude here could use a shower, brush his teeth and shave his unibrow down.

  28. ha

    @27

    No because I don’t find Zac Efron or Jake Gyllenhall (I don’t know how the fuck you spell that name) or Patrick Dempsey or Matthew McConaughey or Kellan Lutz or I don’t know, any of those other guys especially attractive.

    See my other celebrity crushes are Edward Norton and Synyster Gates, the axe in Avenged Sevenfold. So don’t call me a sheep or sheeple (?).

    I’m just saying you don’t have to insult these people. They’re obviously not ugly.

  29. heather

    He’s freaking hot, he just has some very peculiar facial expressions…

  30. gotmilk?

    he doesn’t look dirty to me, but whatever. and if he is, he can rub that dirt all over me all he wants.

  31. Amy

    He is my choice also. Fuck, he’s hot.

  32. Beetlejuice

    I can’t wait until Luke Perry 2.0 disappears as quickly as his first version did.

    I SEE IRRELEVANCE ONCE AGAIN IN YOUR FUTURE, LUKE.

  33. Dread not

    Oh, look, it’s the second coming of Hugh Grant. Will this return also include the eventual and completely staged police bust, where Robert will be arrested for trying to pick up a black hooker, so he loses that squeaky clean image? Where is Divine Brown, anyway? If she has a daughter, she might want to get her ass out on the boulevard to stake her claim on a corner. Her fifteen minutes of fame might pull up to the curb in the near future, and it will be wearing, Robert Pattinson’s face.

  34. bert

    @27, where do you live? I wanna live in a place where you see hotter chicks than MF every weekend at the bars! Seriously

  35. laughable

    #34, go to any college town where the school has an enrollment of more than 10,000 and you will see countless girls that blow Megan Fox out of the water. They even have brains too and if you are lucky you can find one without a trashy tattoo on their forearm.

  36. suck my dick

    A bunch of 12 year old girls think he’s hot. He must be proud

  37. Fati

    What’s this guy’s appeal? Whenever I see him, I get the urge to strip him, take a big rough sponge and soap, and scrape the hell out of him. Then take a razor, shave that ugly “beard” of his, and finally, comb his hair. Maybe he will be sort of good-looking. But with his current image he is just gross.

  38. Linda

    Seriously?!?!?!? Rob a hottie!!! I MUST be blind because I sure as hell don’t find this guy even a little bit attractive. He looks like a serial killer with that crazed look in his eyes!! SCARY!!

  39. Linda

    Seriously?!?!?!? Rob a hottie!!! I MUST be blind because I sure as hell don’t find this guy even a little bit attractive. He looks like a serial killer with that crazed look in his eyes!! SCARY!!

  40. Laura

    EWWWWWWWWW!! SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCK IS THE BIG DEAL WITH THIS GUY?! HE IS NOT SEXY IN THE SLIGHTEST. IN FACT HE LOOKS LIKE ONE OF THOSE SMELLY LOSER KIDS YOU WENT TO HIGHSCHOOL WITH. YOU KNOW, ONE OF THE KIDS WHO ALWAYS HUNG AROUND BY THE GARBAGE CANS, OR IN THE SCIENCE HALLWAY AT LUNCHTIME. SERIOUSLY, DO NOT WANT!

    LADIES, GET HIGHER STANDARDS IF THIS IS YOUR “CHOICE HOTTIE”.
    G-R-O-S-S

  41. Romantic Fool

    Robert looked nice in his jacket and shirt. His hair is gelled to keep it off his forehead but it is not dirty. Robert, unlike most movie stars, does not stare in the mirror 24/7. He is thrown together looking but he will improve as he becomes bigger. I think he has gone from unknown quirky guy to famous hot hunk rather well. Have you seen his interviews on You Tube…search funny interviews and his name…and also him with fans….his fan base is huge and growing

    He is also a very nice and down to earth guy…Jealousy is so uncool.

  42. Robert looked nice in his jacket and shirt. His hair is gelled to keep it off his forehead but it is not dirty. Robert, unlike most movie stars, does not stare in the mirror 24/7. He is thrown together looking but he will improve as he becomes bigger. I think he has gone from unknown quirky guy to famous hot hunk rather well. Have you seen his interviews on You Tube…search funny interviews and his name…and also him with fans….his fan base is huge and growing

    He is also a very nice and down to earth guy…Jealousy is so uncool. Just because this guy looks a little rumpled and like a typical bachelor is no reason to mock him. Unlike most stars, Robert is a modest genuine and beautiful soul.

  43. WTF

    agreed.

    hes down right NASTY!!!
    im sure ive seen him on a park bench somewhere muttering to himself.. fucking homeless!

  44. lol youre kidding me.

    Romatic Fool
    you really are pathetically a romantic fool

    i pity you.. shame shame shame..

    and i love your choice of words that you use.. “HUNK”.

    i cant make out whether you are incredibly YOUNG with no friends who should tell you NEVER to use the word “HUNK”
    or you are one sorry assface who hasnt gotten laid since ’93.

    the last time i heard ANYONE use the word “HUNK” was MAYBE (sorry if i am wrong) back when Dean Cain was still around.

    im really not mocking you in anyway..

    hell who am i kidding.. ofcourse i am!
    and now someones going to point out how retarded i must be cause they will note down all the grammar mistakes, punctuation, spelling.. that ive made here and how i dont capitalize my i’s. xD

  45. good looking teeeeeennn

  46. abba

    *smokes cigarette* was it good for you? (i speak to my right hand, of course)

  47. lori

    It simply amazes me how incredibly stupid and unwashed he can look at the same time in every shot no matter what day of the week it is.

  48. Panic

    He just looks like a troll, to me.

  49. renate

    All you Haters! All what you can do put him down on his looks???….He is an ACTOR ,he has more sexappeal and talent in his little finger than you jealous little dorks have all together. Move on if you don’t like him. Judgemental A…Holes

  50. I believe that emo / goth community of their demi-g0d fucktards will delight teenagers has been praised by the community. I the only person who care enough to or homoerotic vampire Twilight series .. Wesley Pipes can be followed where the blade as you need’em?

Leave A Comment