Robert Pattinson walked the red carpet last night for the world premiere of Twilight where he was reportedly deafened by 50 bajillion screaming teens who thought it’d be cool to scratch their necks all up to simulate a vampire bite. Ha ha. That’s our future, folks. I’m drowning myself in the tub. Us Magazine reports:
“They all just scream at me and now it just kind of feel like my job,” said Pattinson, who joked with MTV News that he’d gone “completely deaf” at the premiere.
Just the other day, Pattinson realized, “there were some girls who had scratched … the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature.
“They were like, ‘We did this for you.’ I didn’t know what to say. ‘Um, thanks guys?’”
Jesus, whatever happened to good ol’ fashioned getting high in your parents basement? If I ever had a daughter and she did something like this, I’d tell her she’s adopted. Of course, later on, I’d have to buy her a pony so she doesn’t stab me in my sleep. See? This parenting thing’s not so tough.
koala | November 18, 2008 at 2:28 pm
first?
Hunter | November 18, 2008 at 2:28 pm
first *shriek*
Rant | November 18, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Who is this jagoff?
Rant | November 18, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Is he the illegitimate son of comedian Richard Lewis?
veggi | November 18, 2008 at 2:37 pm
Smart man. When he starts collecting cherries, this whole “they made themselves bleed first” bs will come in handy…
annie | November 18, 2008 at 2:41 pm
I heard that he appeared on a millionaire & celebrity dating club ^^^^^^MillionaireLoving. C O M^^ ^^^^with a personal account there. Maybe you have the chance to talk to him online or meet some celebrities there. It is amazing.
erica | November 18, 2008 at 2:42 pm
He’s one of those guys who, no matter how unwashed, uncombed and disgustingly scruffy they try to make themselves, always has that pretty boy bone structure and complexion and therefore look like princesses. Not my cup of tea.
sarky | November 18, 2008 at 2:47 pm
I’m not usually one to post about celebrities – but I do find this guy extremely sexy. The fact that he’s fresh and not hollywoodified yet makes him that much more hot.
Sam | November 18, 2008 at 2:50 pm
In high school he was the kid who tried to cut your brake wires after you beat him up. But he set off the alarm and ran away. The next day you beat him up again.
Anyway, that was years ago. Theses days it’s nothing but acting and date rape.
Srsly | November 18, 2008 at 2:51 pm
I’d ride him like a first place show pony.
Sid | November 18, 2008 at 2:52 pm
In time he becomes Peter Parker’s arch nemesis.
crabby old guy | November 18, 2008 at 2:54 pm
He doesn’t know what to say? How about, “Hey, kid, I’m just an actor…while I appreciate your support and all, it’s just a movie.”
See, it really wasn’t all that difficult afterall.
Later today, I’ll be fixing that whole world financial collapse thingy – and preparing a lovely lasagna.
CaptainMorgan | November 18, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Who cares about this guy? I want Kristen Stewart! I’d suck on her neck etc. all day long.
Erica | November 18, 2008 at 2:59 pm
I love Twilight, just like every other teen girl. I’m going to see it on Friday, so excited.
lulu | November 18, 2008 at 3:00 pm
yuck..this guy is kinda ugly.
le fag | November 18, 2008 at 3:02 pm
will he pleeeeze tweeze that unibrow?????? and for chrissakes comb that greasy hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
teenager a lot ago | November 18, 2008 at 3:03 pm
he´s hot and u are not.period
dirty old guy | November 18, 2008 at 3:04 pm
He doesn’t know what to say? How about, “Hey, kid, howsabout coming back to my hotel room and lettin’ me do a little blood-letting”?
combustion8 | November 18, 2008 at 3:04 pm
movie looks dumb as hell.. whats with the “force running”?
thatlizkid | November 18, 2008 at 3:08 pm
he could have washed his hair at least before going to the premiere…
Rough Daddy | November 18, 2008 at 3:08 pm
Yeah, theyre all future strippers, these screaming meemies!!!
Like ZOMG! | November 18, 2008 at 3:09 pm
#17 – if you give it up to him I bet you’ll be the most popular.
JustSaying | November 18, 2008 at 3:13 pm
He looks like a grown up Haley Joel Osment (The kid who’s now grown from The Sixth Sense). I swear he looks 10 times better in Vampire makeup, he looks nothing like the movie. He always looks dumb in all his pics.
havoc | November 18, 2008 at 3:14 pm
I see Salma Hayek loaned him her eyebrows for the event….
.
teenager a lot ago | November 18, 2008 at 3:21 pm
22 no thanks not, I can be popular by my own self, Indeed I´m really popular right now with ur dad, he sends u regards!
Cliff Clavin | November 18, 2008 at 3:27 pm
#17 Like ZOMG! – BURN!!!!!
scene | November 18, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Robert Pattinson: “…and THAT’S why I bit your neck – I’m a vampire!”
Victim: “That wasn’t my neck.”
Robert Pattinson: “Well…nevertheless…I’m a vampire!”
Victim: “You bit my ass cheek.”
Robert Pattinson: “Yes, well, that’s what I do…I”m—”
Victim: “After licking my asshole.”
Robert Pattinson: “Um…yes, of course, it’s all part of how I seduce a young girl!”
Victim: “I’m a guy.”
Robert Pattinson: “Well…it was dark…I’m as surprised as you are, and I—”
Victim: “You told me to say ‘Fuck me, Tom Cruise, fuck me in the ass!”
Robert Pattinson: “Yes, well…”
SinDee | November 18, 2008 at 3:30 pm
“I´m really popular right now with ur dad, he sends u regards!”
O no u di’int!
langdon | November 18, 2008 at 3:31 pm
Holy shit that is an ugly dude.
michelle | November 18, 2008 at 3:33 pm
who? what?
what’s the hype about? i bet this movie sucks a big donkey wang.
Cliff Clavin | November 18, 2008 at 3:41 pm
I’ve seen the TV trailer only once – this was good movie the first time they made it – when they called it Lost Boys. Rip off.
Cliff Clavin | November 18, 2008 at 3:41 pm
I’ve seen the TV trailer only once – this a was good movie the first time they made it – when they called it Lost Boys. Rip off.
Dr. Phil | November 18, 2008 at 3:49 pm
He’s a classic type. Very delicate, with a bottom-homosexual’s softness, so when he plays the bad boy, he’s not sexually threatening at all. Young girls who want to experiment with sexuality but not get too scared would find him appealing. As far as older people…I’m sure the aging queens would find him “delish.”
jrz | November 18, 2008 at 3:50 pm
He looks like his face got caved in. What an incredibly fucked up lookin’ dude.
Shit For Brains | November 18, 2008 at 4:01 pm
He looks like someone just sucked his brain out through his asshole. (Could that be the new vampire?)
Who sucks their cheeks in for added sex appeal anymore anyway?
Idiot.
Chauncey Gardner | November 18, 2008 at 4:02 pm
He looks sort of chinky-linky, like DiCaprio. They both look like fucking Dragon Ball Z characters, like they should be gritting their teeth and having “action lines” behind them in every photo.
dew | November 18, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Back in the day — before half the population was disgustingly fat — there were so many healthy fit guys that there were choices about who was actually hot.
This guy’s not hot, he’s just average (except for the dufus haircut). But young girls have such a smaller selection of healthy guys to choose from, that even average guys are now swooned over.
Chauncey Gardner | November 18, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Oh, and the chick is kinda sexy, but I get a serious lesbian vibe from her.
Clem | November 18, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Nope, I just don’t get it. I can appreciate handsome men – Hugh Jackman for instance but tis guy?…does not compute.
Kaboom! | November 18, 2008 at 4:22 pm
“not hollywoodified ”
Are you fuckin kidding me?
Jenny | November 18, 2008 at 4:30 pm
he gives me the creeps
NY Ted | November 18, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Who cares about pretty-boy…who is the sexy hot young tarty tart with him….???
I’d like to give her some of my Vampire blood…..!!!!
Gigidy…gigidy…gigidy….Oh YEAH!
me | November 18, 2008 at 5:07 pm
it looks like someone hit him in the face dead on with a board when he was a baby
Fernanado Narcos | November 18, 2008 at 5:10 pm
Wil Wheaton called.He wants his face back.
weird | November 18, 2008 at 5:18 pm
They seriously look like siblings. LOOK AT THEM. Same color hair, same color eyes, same giant chin.
BunnyButt | November 18, 2008 at 5:41 pm
That was nice of him to take his aunt to the premiere.
czarina | November 18, 2008 at 6:12 pm
This guy must smoke so much weed–he looks baked in every single photo I’ve seen of him. He’s definitely not hot.
me | November 18, 2008 at 6:21 pm
It creeps me out when the main characters who are supposed to be all sexy with eachother LOOK THE SAME. Like this movie. Why did they have to cast two actors that look like they are twins? It’s creepy to watch.
Another example is Sweeny Todd. Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Crater have an uncanny resemblance.
not impressed | November 18, 2008 at 6:22 pm
who is that ugly clingy chick?
of course he’s stoned. he prolly toked up right before the premiere.
still not impressed | November 18, 2008 at 6:25 pm
her dress is horrendous. i hope she shoots her stylist after this one.