Robert Shapiro Quit

July 20th, 2010 // 39 Comments

Here’s Lindsay Lohan‘s assistant yanking clothes out of Robert Shapiro‘s Sober House yesterday while he excused himself as Lindsay’s attorney after barely four days of representing hers. Turns out she was an absolute terror to deal with at his rehab facility which is shocking. Truly shocking. E! News reports:

Though ostensibly a positive step, it may have been Lohan’s brief stay at the Los Angeles residence that made things worse. A source tells E! News that Shapiro was not happy with her behavior there.
“She was unruly,” the source says. “She was having people over at all hours of the night. She acted like she ran the place.”
The actress was apparently out of the facility Monday. Her assistant was spotted there late in the evening, removing some of the star’s personal belongings, but there was no sign of Lohan aside from a smart-alecky Twitter posting.
“The only ‘bookings’ that i’m familiar with are Disney Films, never thought that i’d be “booking” into Jail… eeeks,” the onetime Parent Trap star tweeted Monday.

So basically Lindsay found out this rehab stunt wouldn’t keep her out of jail and started pretending she’s famous again. Got it. What surprises me the most is that someone in the past 12 hours hasn’t found a chewed-off Scram outside the closest bar to her house. Then again, I probably shouldn’t rule out Lindsay showing up to court with enough coke on her face to look like the goddamn Joker. “Heath and I were soulmates, don’tcha get it?” *sniffff*

Photos: Splash News


  1. oooaaahhh


  2. leah

    That’s awesome. Fish you made my day.

  3. its me fuckers

    Now her old lawyer has stepped up to rep her this morning… SCH deserves a medal for repping LL. Shapiro got the publicity for his sober living house and dropped her like a sack of rotten potatoes. Do you blame him?

    • Cock Dr

      Not at all.
      I congratulate him on his quick escape from LiLo lunacy land.
      Is this a ploy…..LiLO thinks that if she doesn’t have a lawyer with her today she’ll be given more time before her incarceration to come up with one?
      God I hope not!

  4. fuuuu

    well she really is jailbait now isnt she ahh to see Disney stars grow up

  5. not sure he could have been her attorney all along as the other attorney hadn’t signed whatever release there needed to be.

  6. Commented on this photo:

    How does the girl have an assistant? And for what?

    “The star…..” she’s no star, just a spoiled little bitch who gets her photo taken for being a train wreck…

  7. At least she is already use to living out of a trash bag… stay classy LiLo

    • Booya

      I laughed at the trash bags, lol…

    • Large Master

      I guess that she can’t afford any luggage. Spending all of her cash on her “prescription” meds?

      • RaraAvis

        Seriously, how much coin do you think she could have? Funny thing about cash – it tends to run out. Especially when your reputation precedes you and the free shit stops flowing in.

        She’ll be giving blowjobs for cigs in three, two, one…

  8. You know…generally I make stupid comments about these people because I find their behavior entertaining. Seriously, though, this woman is completely incomprehensible to me. It’s been explained to her ad infinitum that she’s causing herself shit-tons of trouble. Is it really that hard to calm the fuck down for a few weeks? Seriously, if she hadn’t been such a toe-head, she wouldn’t be in this situation. It’s not stupidity, it’s some form of obliviousness…it’s like she can’t see that she’s fucking herself over.

    *sigh* At this rate we’ll never see her gobbling rod as Linda Lovelace.

    • MariC38

      Well said…I dont understand what is wrong with her.

    • It’s a delusional sense of self-entitlement. How much the coke and booze amplify that is anyone’s guess. She’s special, the rules don’t apply, and when anyone tres to apply them, why, she’ll just “explain” herself (ii.e. lie) and cry and people will realize her specialness and let her continue to do what she wants because she deserves to. Having a delusional grasping mommy who wants to be you and hitting fame at an early age can fuck you up. She’s had far too many industry wakeup calls and second, third and fourth chances; her name is a synonym for addiction and theft; her career is so deep in the shitter the sound of the actual flush is only a distant memory, and she still clings to the illusion she’s above it all because that’s all that’s left to her – acknowleding that she’ll be working in WalMart in her 30′s is something she can’t deal with.

  9. AtomicCoffee

    You can have guests over at rehab? For what? Dinner parties?

  10. Nameless

    After Lindsay checks into the jail, the guards can just throw the key away after locking her up in her cell. No one wants her back out. and doing the same exact shit 90 days from now.

  11. Rhialto

    I’m surprised but on the other hand i’m not surprised.That’s quite confusing.

  12. welp she just walked into the courthouse, lets see if the judge brings up the fingernails..

  13. Anonymous

    Checking LL into rehab on Friday knowing she is going to jail on Monday was a stupid idea to begin with… exactly what help could she gotten over a 3 days.

    Her focus was on the all you can eat lesbian buffet she’s gonna have for the next 90 days.

  14. timbo

    Her assistant better cash and left over payroll checks quickly.

    It will be tough to pay an assistant on 11 cents per hour.

  15. Robert Acquafresca

    Shapiro is a first class douche bag looking for the same publicity Lindsay is. This is just another example of him stepping forward to represent someone and after he gets a little pub and realizes he cant make a plea deal in five minutes, he either leaves or turnes the case over to a better lawyer all while pretending to be in charge. While the real work is going on, he is teaching the client to write a will or steer them towards rehab into his fish and chips facility. No wonder his son turned out the way he did.

  16. jt

    lindsay lohan is an assistant? for what?

  17. Ha ha! Let the mad, Firecrotch Fisting Festival begin!
    (I loves me my alliteration.)

  18. Max

    The article says the assistant removed the belongings “late in the evening” but the picture was obviously taken at noon. So which is it? (I know it doesn’t matter, I just the discrepancy was interesting.)

  19. Booya

    I wonder what it is exactly she is hooked on? Booze? Meth? Crack? Coke? What?

    I know there are some people who will do anything they can get their hands on, but most addicts do have a drug of choice.

    • Cock Dr

      She’s hooked on prescription meds first, along with booze, possbily coke & Ecstasy.
      Hope to god she’s off that dilaudid some fool MD prescribed her. That shit will kill you….especially mixed with other drugs.
      Any Dr prescribing anything to LiLo at this point should have their practice investigated.

      • lindsayslovechild

        hope that she’s OFF it? Fuck that! PUT HER BACK ON IT!

        Miley Cyrus will be the drug-hag of choice very soon, therefore any entertainment Lindsay offers on that front will pale in comparison. Put her in the ground and lets start on the next generation!

  20. ktb ( . )( . )

    I’ve been reading that her actual time behind bars will be something like 23 days. Suck it up, get out and fake your way through rehab.
    Sadly, this is not rock bottom for this stupid little girl.
    She’ll be out in no time and overdose during her release party.

    What? A girl can dream, can’t she?

  21. Thedork

    WTF? She has an assistant? I’m a good person and I don’t have an assistant. I’ve never even been to celebrity prison (not real prison i.e. no FFF). America is so damn skewed.

    • What, did you oversleep the morning they were handed out? I have one, every other good person in America has one, too. Because that’s the way the world works – we’re all rewarded for goodness on earth and we live in an earthly kingdom where everybody has exactly the same things as everyone else. Don’t you dare blame America just because you’re a loser who hit the snooze alarm on the wrong day.

  22. captain america

    ………..he saw “The Light”, folks?

  23. Diane

    I think her main problem is that she is terrified to give up her drugs.

  24. Kerri

    who the heck packs that much to go to a sober living house? was she going to change her clothes every five minutes in case she bumped into photographers in the common room? what a loser.

  25. jojo

    Over a year representing OJ – less than a week representing Lindsey. she might want to rethink burning bridges with the guy who beat the biggest slam dunk murder case in american history.

  26. Abzirv

    Why Americans loving so much to see suffering?

    The TMZ show all week is laughing & joking how she will be raped and tortured.

    US has more % in jail than old Soviet Union & even apartheit South Africa.

    It is big business called corrections industry and very recommended investment because it always is growing.

    Also the business industries of weapons, tasers and other torture equipment, is all the taxpayers want to buy!

    Every day they are bombing in many countries, and even torturing to their own people with taser!

    Their belief is that it is freedom, to sacrifice even their children and their future so that the world will be more afraid of America

    They are very successful and their wish came true.

    The whole world is very afraid of America!

    • agentofgoldstein

      If you are so afraid of America do us a favor…kill yourself. But please, get a camera and let us watch, since we all seem to be addicted to schodenfreudistic tendancies. But before you go/die, please remove yourself from an entertaiment website and head on over to, where you can be ignored and riddiculed in true American fashion.

    • Wiley

      Abzirv, you’ve been told about spilling your guts to the public and now we have to come for you! We want your wife, parents and children too! No use resisting because we are the US!

  27. Cody

    1 u need 2 learn english. 2 u no wat ul get & u trashin USA NEway? How stupid Ru??

    U r wy we need weppons doochbag. 2 stamp out nsergentz like u & protect or fredom.

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