Robert Pattinson’s Banging Elvis’ Granddaughter

Here’s Elvis granddaughter Riley Keough who, according to the Daily Mail, is dating Robert Pattinson, so right off the bat you know she passed the first test of hates cunnilingus. That said, people are trying to say she looks like Kristen Stewart which a. huh? And b. is probably one of the worst things you can say to a woman, and that’s coming from a man who’s spent the past three years accusing of Reese Witherspoon of being pregnant every time she retains water. Water that’s clearly amniotic fluid, but you get my point.

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